Sadness

James Garner underwent surgery this week after suffering a minor stroke. His rep told Reuters that 80-year-old James is currently recovering at a Los Angeles-area hospital. James underwent surgery on Sunday and he's concious and responsive. His rep said he will hopefully be released soon, but she didn't have anymore details on his stroke.

Not King Marchand from Victor Victoria! Anybody but him.

The city of Memphis has decided to cut ties with A&E's "The First 48" which means one of Dlisted's Hot Sluts of the Week, Caroline Mason, won't be on TV anymore.

Memphis has become one of the favorite featured cities on the show. The show's executive producer said she didn't know why Memphis broke up with them, "I really have no idea. I mean the people of Memphis seem to love it."

The Memphis Police Department said the homicide detectives need a break. NO! Caroline doesn't need a break. She is not done sharing her glamour and detective skills with the country. A&E better take this tragedy and turn it into a TV show. A TV show starring St. Caroline Mason! Think Columbo, but with more lip liner and elegance.

City leaders say being on the show has given Memphis a bad rap! "Memphis is not unlike any other urban city where we have our challenges, but it's certainly a great place to live, and we want to advocate that to others and encourage them to visit our city."

Bad rap?! I'm tempted to move to Memphis just to be closer to Sgt. Caroline Mason! I will miss her. Below is a fan video of Caroline's best moments.

Source

Thanks Blake

Nooooooooooo! Talk Sex with Sue Johanson will end its run at midnight this Sunday on Oxygen. This is also when I'll be ending my life. Couldn't they give a bitch some kind of notice?! This has been sprung on us out of nowhere.

Sue started giving practical sex advice in 1984 on a Canadian radio station. The TV call-in show started on Oxygen six seasons ago. The show ending has nothing to do with its rating. This season delivered their best ratings ever.

77-year-old Sue said, "It's been part of my life and I just love it. I'm going to miss writing scripts. I'm going to miss having to read books. I'm going to miss playing with sex toys."

"I have been on television for 32 years. I think it's time. I figured if we haven't got it by now, we're not going to get it. We've got to make room for somebody else."

Sue isn't retiring. She will continue to give lectures. The show will still be available on Oxygen's website on demand.

Sue can't do this to us! Sue has taught me so much about sex and sex toys. I feel like she's my second abuelita. Oxygen better not even think of replacing this ho! She's irreplaceable. Well, unless they replace her with Bea Arthur, but only Bea! She knows nothing about sex, but it would be hot to hear her talking about "lubricating the vagina" and "feces on the penis."

Below is a clip of Sue explaining to a pregnant woman named "Britney" that it's not possible for the penis to hit an unborn baby's head during sex. Yes, her name is BRITNEY.

Source

For some reason I watched the Kentucky Derby today and watched as Filly Eight Belles finished second behind Big Brown. Eight Belles collapsed moments later with two broken front ankles. An ambulance reached the track and euthanized her on the spot.

The on-call vet told the AP, "There was no possible way to save her. She broke both front ankles. That's a bad injury." Sadness.

R.I.P. Eight Belles

Gary Coleman's appearance on "Divorce Court" concluded today with talk about sex, TruTV and Shannon Price's dogs. Gary basically wants more fucking in his life. He called their sex life "mediocre." Shannon is completely fine with the way that things are in the bedroom.

He said that they have physical issues that makes it hard for them to be intimate. Shannon has three dachshunds in the house, so she's busy "with that." Ewwwww...she's totally fucking her dachshunds.

In the clip below Judge Toler finally asked them if they consummated their marriage. Gary answered, "I...yeah...well...yeah....it's a little bit complicated."

That means he couldn't reach. Get that man a step stool! He needs to get laid.

The show ended with Judge Toler giving the couple "homework." She basically told them to be positive and to come back in 6 months. Some fucking homework assignment. She should have given them my advice, "Get a step stool!"

Shannon and Gary promised they would not get a divorce and they will work on their marriage.

Oh and Gary's still broke. He even mentioned that he had to call the mortgage company to tell them he could only pay half of this month's bill. Can't Mr. Drummond give him a loan?

Today was the first part of Gary Coleman's appearance on Divorce Court. Gary and his wife, Shannon Price (no relation to Phoebe), came to Judge Toler to discuss all the issues in their 7-month marriage.

In the above clip, 22-year-old Shannon tells a story about a fight she had with Gary over a conversation they had with a stranger. The stranger claimed to know the exact date the world was ending. Shannon disagreed with the man and she was upset with Gary for not supporting her. WTF! Shannon's story basically sums up their relationship. Tweeeeeeeekers. Meth much? Stranger my ass! Dealer is more like it.

Here are some of the other things they discussed:

Gary doesn't want children - He said, "I didn't like children when I was one."
Gary and Shannon are up all night and they sleep all day
Gary has anger issues and if he doesn't get his way he throws tantrums like a 5-year-old
Gary leaves the house at 3am and doesn't come home
Gary doesn't want any friends

The saddest part came when Gary said, "I have low-self esteem. I don't feel successful in life. I want the world for her and I get very frustrated that I can't bring it to her. I don't feel financially secure and a lot of time I feel like I'm wasting her time." He was on Diff'rent Strokes! You're not a failure if you were on Diff'rent Strokes!

Tomorrow, Judge Toler will tackle their issues about sex. Can't wait......

And the changes begin! EW is reporting that Project Runway will move to Los Angeles for its sixth season which will debut on Lifetime in November. The show's fifth season was shot in NYC and will start in July on Bravo.

A Lifetime spokeswhore denies the change, but EW claims they have two well-placed sources.

What the hell is next? Tim Gunn replaced by Carson Kressley? Blech. Elle Magazine replaced by Redbook Magazine? Heidi Klum replaced by Heidi Montag? Seriously, it's possible.

I better not give Lifetime any ideas.

First of all, at least ten zillion people sent me this which makes me feel like a real crackhead. For the broken record, I have never taken LS....ok....even I can't finish that sentence.

Albert Hofman, the swiss chemist who discovered LSD passed away from a heart attack at his home in Basel. He was 102. This only proves that LSD does a body good. He lived to be 102!

Dr. Hofman created LSD in 1938. He discovered its effects when he accidentally took some. He said, "Everything I saw was distorted as in a warped mirror". He tried to argue that it could treat mental illness, but it eventually became a street drug in the 60s.

Let's all bow our heads and have a flashback in his honor.

Source - Image: Tripzie

Thanks Josette

Japan's only giant panda, Ling Ling, died of old age today at Tokyo's Ueno Zoo. Ling Ling was 22 years and seven months old. This is the equivalent age of a 70-year-old human. Mourners said a pray for Ling Ling and placed flowers at a makeshift altar near his enclosure. Ling Ling was removed from public viewing two days ago, because he was suffering from heart and kidney failure.

The zookeeper said, "Ling Ling was a representative of our zoo. He died peacefully. I think he lived a full life."

Ling Ling was the only giant panda owned by Japan. There's 8 giant pandas in Japan, but they are all being leased by China.

R.I.P. Ling Ling!

Source

It was nice while it lasted. Nicole Richie's bodacious pregnant chichis are completely gone now. We barely knew each other. She's back to looking like a surf board. I just want to grab her ass, head to the beach and catch a wave.

And is this ho moonlighting as a night nurse in the maternity ward? What the fuckity fuck is she wearing? It's probably from Katherine Heigl's medical uniform collection.