Morning Wood

When even Iggy Pop is dry heaving, it's time to stick an Ensure Drip into your arms - Daily Mail

Newsweek asks a very important question, but they could've gotten the answer just by looking at her face - Celebitchy

Yeh, I'm sure the "ladies" don't mind Gerard Butler's voluptuous fopa - ICYDK

Sienna Miller has some competition in the category of "British bull dozing vaginas" - Holy Moly!

There are nekkid pictures of James Spader out there - SOW

Why is Kelly Clarkson singing into an empty french fry cone in her new video? - I'm Not Obsessed

Brangelina go to McDonald's and order "The Aniston Break-Up Special" (4 chocolate milkshakes, 2 caramel sundaes and their entire stock of Oreo McFlurries) - Socialite Life

And then a strong wind came which blew Posh's skinny ass right off that swing. I think she's floating around somewhere in Asia now - ICYDK

basement. baby. is. angry. about. haters. hating. on. her. shaved. head. - I'm Not Obsessed

Dear Gilles Marini, we've all seen your skin baguette in HD, so stop being such a tease and show us again. Wink. - Celebitchy

Bird poopy on a newspaper - SOW

Kelis deserves $50,000 a day from Nas after going through a zillion hours of labor - The Fab Life

Tara Reid still exists. And she has a new boyfriend (who has registered an 8.7 on my gaydar scale) - Socialite Life

I think this is what Emily Bronte wore to her book signings too - Queerty

Bianca Gascoigne's weave needs an IV drip - Holy Moly!

First, Beyonce takes away Basement Baby's freedom and now she's taking away her wigs! STOP THE INSANITY! - Daily Mail

The Melrose Place cast gets Photoshopped into oblivion - SOW

Cokeyhead calling the cokehead cokey - Celebitchy

Your hourly pictures of Shia LaDouche walking - ICYDK

Thankfully for Paula Abdul, Cheryl Cole is dumb when it comes to making career decisions - Holy Moly!

Buffy's baby bulge - Socialite Life

Nick Lachey doesn't have a girlfriend anymore, so he went out and picked up five hos. I know! WHAT AN ASS! - I'm Not Obsessed

The Jonas Brothers come out of the plushie closet - SOW

Nora the musical genius pussy made her orchestra debut - OMG Blog

Mischa Barton will be freed from the loony bin in the next few days - I'm Not Obsessed

Kiefer Sutherland's will not be persecuted for his headbutting shenanigans - Holy Moly!

Yeah, we all know what's really in HoHan's lollipops.... - ICYDK

KFat of Fail - Celebitchy

Somewhere in the world, a thieving bitch now has the largest collection of black dresses ever. Call Guinness! - Socialite Life

It's a good thing Peter Andre didn't fall on his mug or Harvey would've gone completely hoarse from laughing so hard at it - Holy Moly!

And all Latina women think all David Arquettes are dumb fucks. I asked them all and that's what they said - Celebitchy

Robert Downey Jr. is horny - I'm Not Obsessed

Marion Ross' wig game is still on point - SOW

Christina Milian to become Mrs. The Dream, which sounds like a nightmare to me - Popeater

Fuggie Fug came untucked. Bitch is kind of hung - Socialite Life

The police better expect to get thousands of "bomb scare" calls from people who have just seen The Ugly Truth - ICYDK

CODE BLUE! Vanessa Bryant is smothering her fat chichi balls - Moe Jackson

Tony Romo went cougar hunting after he dumped Jessica Simpson - Celebitchy

Fatty the dog probably ran away in the first place because his owner named him "Fatty" - Popbytes

Can Bethenny Frankel take the Discountess with her? - Gay Wired

The role Johnny Depp was born to play! - ICYDK

Yoko Ono's #1 fan is going to be in the third Twilight movie - Socialite Life

Click. Flash. Pink. Crash. Photo. Shop. Fakery. - I'm Not Obsessed

If Donald Trump is unable to walk Ivanka down the aisle, I think her old nose should do the honors - Popeater

BROW SUFFOCATION: Kim Kardassian needs to be arrested for eyebrow abuse - I'm Not Obsessed

Justin Timberlake wants to skip through RPattz's enchanted unicorn patch - Celebitchy

I co-sign this: Russell Brand dresses like a cross between "Osama Bin Laden and MC Hammer" - Holy Moly!

Miley Cyrus will play a fairy in a movie. So this is how she's going to get Justin Gaston back - Socialite Life

The cover of Life & Style should read: "Photoshop helped me lose 20lbs in four minutes" - ICYDK

It won't be long before Maddie Briann starts asking if she can have a drag after downing a Bud - TMZ

LL Cool J quarantined! - Popwrap

Lock up your rapey-eyed son, Tamra! Here comes The Real Housewives of Orange County's newest gold digging blonde ho - E! Online

Gerard Butler needs to stop with the lie-telling! - Celebitchy

Neve Campbell will be back. Bitch needs a check - ICYDK

You would be crying too if your mother had a turkey's ass on her head - Socialite Life

If Jo slaps Asshole Simpson in the mouth at least once, I'm okay with this - SOW

Remind me to never get pregnant - I'm Not Obsessed

Little Bunny Poo Poo - Holy Moly!

The hottest vagina addict around takes his nipple for a dip - Popbytes

She-Douche and He-Douche leaving the Hollywood Bowl - ICYDK

Aw. Johnny Depp just wants to ride the rides without crazy fangirls trying to ride him - I'm Not Obsessed

Everybody hates Kara DioGoAwayAlready's ugly song - SOW

Needs more CHICHIIIIIS - Moe Jackson

It sounds to me like David Beckham is hypnotized by St. Angie's holy vagina. It's got him tongue-tied! - Celebitchy

If you squint and believe, you might see George Clooney and Robert DeNiro on a yacht together - Holy Moly!

Jon Gosselin is not going to make your baby look like an a-hole....for now - Socialite Life

Jon Gosselin's 22-year-old (HA! and HA!) refined girlfriend is a perfect role model for his ten million kids. I'm being totally serious. Shit, bitch is my role model! - ONTD

Shiny happy topless people with iPhones - Pink is the New Blog

Ryan Gaycrest has become one of the richest queens on TV - ICYDK

Lady CaCa is actually looking sexy hot here - SOW

Another boy bander admits to having a taste for the peen. Wake me when one of the pieces from Color Me Badd comes out - Holy Moly!

There goes the neighborhood - I'm Not Obsessed

Not since Wolverine has a movie with a gay main character made this much money at the box office - Socialite Life

If Eva Longwhoria really wanted to turn us on, she'd tie up her lips with silk scarves - Celebitchy