John Mayer

I Want To Want It

John Mayer is hot on paper, but I just don't want any of that. I guess I can't lick any Wonderland that Chestica Simpson's traveled on. I mean he has this sort of hot, 70s, homeless man thing going on....but for some reason my asslips don't tingle at the sight of him. Oh who am I fooling?! I'd still tap that.

Here's Johnny M in August's GQ.

Posted by: Michael K

150 comments •

John Mayer

John Mayer Paints Pretty Pictures

John Mayer painted this beautiful picture of two horses in a romantic embrace. I'm guessing he painted it during his time with Jessica Simpson. The horse on the right has her mouth.

VIA Best Week Ever

Posted by: Michael K

55 comments •

John Mayer

Jessica and John are Back On...Sort Of

Jessica Simpson and John Mayer are currently on a little vacation in Cabo San Lucas, but things don't look so happy. The two look like they are in a deep conversation with Jessica nagging his ass! Ugh, those "relationship" talks are the worse! He should just push her ass.

Source: Flyne t

Thanks E

Posted by: Michael K

101 comments •

Jessica Simpson • John Mayer

Chipmunk Loving Back On?

Are Jessica Simpson and John Mayer already back together? Just when John was starting to look attractive he's tappin' that mess again. Sources at InTouch Weekly say they saw John leaving the SoHo Grand Hotel in NYC today where Jess is saying.

A friend of Jess' said, "They definitely went on a date last night,. She still loves him, but he's not stable. He's scared of commitment. He breaks up with her and then regrets it and then begs her to get back together."

John is vaginatized by that?! Actually, these two chipmunks deserve one another. Will they get married already and just go away! The both of em!

Posted by: Michael K

53 comments •

Jessica Simpson • John Mayer

Mayer's Anti-Simpson Search

Newly single John Mayer was spotted in NYC this past weekend hitting on girls that were the opposite of Jessica Simpson. Witnesses say that he was seen trying to "canoodle" with super-skinny girls and seemed to hit it off with an Asian chick.

One source close to the couple said they wouldn't be surprised if they got back together since they are always breaking up. John apparently doesn't like the way Jessica dresses. FAG!

He probably didn't like the way she dressed, because she dresses like a damn drag queen and it stirred the homo feelings within. Can't fight the ass tingle John!

Source: NYDN

Posted by: Michael K

47 comments •

John Mayer

Improvement

It's amazing what a little hair chop can do. John Mayer ALMOST looks do-able. There's still something about him that puts me off. Perhaps it's the thought of him with a mouthful of Chestica Simpson's fake-tanned lady parts that grosses me out. Here's Johnny at last night's Time's 100 Most Influential Hos of 2007. There was no Chestica in sight. She's too dumb for Time.

Posted by: Michael K

63 comments •

John Mayer

Hot?

John Mayer and Jessica Simpson have brought their chipmunk love to Australia where John went shirtless on the beach today

He's not hot in my book, but some of you may be into that sort of thing. The fact that he's dating that annoying wench also makes him not very attractive.

That dumb broad needs to stop opening her mouth! Nothing good can come of it.

Image Sources: JJB , People

Posted by: Michael K

156 comments •

Jessica Simpson • John Mayer

Jessica's a Screamer

Jessica Simpson and John Mayer are on like a World Tour of Fugly and arrived in Australia over the weekend. Before that they were in Italy where hotel guests were stunned at her cries of passion in the night. Vomit.

A source said, "Jessica and John got back fairly early and stayed in all night. But by the sounds of it, they didn't get to sleep for a long time.

"This woman was saying she couldn't believe Jessica sounded like she was getting it on so loudly in the room next door."

The woman screaming loudly was probably John. You know these two look fine on their own, but together brings out the ugg in each other.

Image Source, Story Source

Posted by: Michael K

107 comments •

Jessica Simpson • John Mayer

Chipmunk Love

Jessica Simpson came to NYC to watch her man, John Mayer, in concert at MSG last night. The pair later partied at Stereo. Is it just me or do these kind of look like each other? They look like two chipmunks and not the cute, fresh chimpunks either. They look like the city ones that are beat and probably addicted to crack! I mean there's enough grease between them to fry up taters at McDonald's for the next year.

Posted by: admin

133 comments •

Jessica Simpson • John Mayer

John Mayer is Turning Japanese

Grammy-winner John Mayer, kept things Japanese when Ryan Seacrest asked him about Jessica Simpson on the Grammy awards red carpet. When Ryan asked what the real deal was, John answered in Japanese and then said, "Take it to another room, find a Japanese person, decode it, and you'll have an answer."

Of course what John said was translated into, "She is very beautiful – and you're the last to know."

Okaaay. Jessica did not escort John on the red carpet, but the two met up at the Sony/BMG party where they made no secret that they are a couple. Jessica also made no secret that she has shoulders built for the NFL. Damn, I didn't know she was built like that!