Royals

 

Well, it didn't!  

 

Finally Prince Hot Ginge is free to be with me! That's if you believe The News of the World anyway. They claim Chelsy Davy ended her 3-year relationship with Prince Harry over the phone this week. 

 

Chelsy was reportedly fed up with Prince Hot Ginge getting drunk and fooling around with other chicks. Just hours after being dumped Harry was seen "canoodling" with another chick at a club. 

 

A source close to Hot Ginge said, "He and Chelsy have come to a crossroads and sadly have decided to go their separate ways. Harry has got a lot to give to the army and his charities and that will be his main priority."

 

A friend of Chelsy's said, "Chelsy just couldn't put up with his antics any more. She feels they've fallen out of love. She was sick to the back teeth of Harry not putting the maximum amount of effort into the relationship. "

 

Hot Ginge is too much tool for one woman. He's a young douche and those types never stay true. Perhaps one day he'll grow up to be a tampon, but right now he's too busy getting into trouble.

 

 

 

Someone tried to blackmail the Royals and Scotland Yard is on the case. Back in August 2 dudes allegedly demanded $100,000 for a sex tape involving one of the Royals. Scotland Yard set up a sting where the two men came and played a clip from the tape for them. The dumbasses thought they were meeting with private staff of the Royals.

 

The tape shows an aide giving oral sex to a Royal. The men also claims to have evidence proving this Royal gave a bag of coke to the aide.

 

The dudes have been charged with blackmail.

 

I need it to be Prince Harry! Firerod! I mean he'd be the only one that'd let a staff member polish off the Royal sceptor. With our luck it'd be someone nasty like Prince Charles. The last thing I need to see is someone sucking on that slug's tail.

 

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Here are some of the pics taken from a video of Prince Harry snorting vodka through his nose while on vacay in Namibia last November! When news of the video surfaced , medical official hos were all pissed off saying Prince Harry could've killed himself by snorting booze!  

 

It was all part of some drinking game Harry played with his friends reports The News of the World .

 

This is typical frat douche behavior! Normally I'd say that a picture of shirtless young men with wine glasses on their titties was gayer than a pink unicorn laying down on a bed of cotton candy, but this isn't gay at all. This is just straight morons being straight morons.

 

Although I did get a little tickle in the no-no area from seeing Prince Hot Ginge licking some dude nip!

 

Prince Hot Ginge for King!  

 

 

 

 

 

This story is a couple of days old, but this is the first I'm hearing of it. I'm glad I did! Prince Harry was reportedly caught on tape snorting Vodka into his nose! The video was taken while 23-year-old Harry was on vacation with his girlfriend Chelsy last November.

 

The Sun reports:

 

In the footage — seen by The Sun — pals egg the royal on as he first takes a SWIG of booze, then SPITS it into the bottle top.

 

Harry — wearing a Crocodile Dundee hat — covers his right nostril with his finger before taking a huge SNIFF through the other.

He throws back his head to take the full “hit” of vodka — and then reels in shock. The Prince is seen shuddering as his friends cheer.

 

The Duchess of Cornbread, Camilla Parker Bowles, had apparently been dreading going to the memorial service for Diana this Friday. Prince Charles apparently wanted Camilla to be there. Sources say the two had many a fight over attending the service on Friday.

 

A source said, "All eyes would have been on her. We would have been thinking, 'What's Camilla doing? Is she crying? Is she feeling awkward?'

"It would have been awful for her. It was madness to think she should have gone."

The Queen allowed Camilla not to attend. Cams issued this statement: ""I am very touched to have been invited by Prince William and Prince Harry to attend the thanksgiving service for their mother Diana, Princess of Wales. I accepted and wanted to support them, however, on reflection I believe my attendance could divert attention from the purpose of the occasion which is to focus on the life and service of Diana.

"I'm grateful to my husband, William and Harry for supporting my decision."

Awkward! I would be afraid people would throw vegetables at my ass and shit! It's a good thing Camilla can stay home and watch "Murder She Wrote" with a slice of Sarah Lee pound cake.

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Prince Harry's army pals have nicknamed him "Ginger Bullet Magnet" and even bought themselves red wing so the enemies would have a hard time figuring out which one's Harry. The Prince's chick has even started calling him "Big Ginger."

How sweet. Speaking of red wings. Do you think Harry has earned his. UGH! Why the hell do I keep grossing myself out. If you don't know what "red wings" are....you don't want to know!

 

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Is anybody watching this right now? It's actually getting to my cold, black heart! The Concert for Diana is going on live right now from London. You can catch it on VH1 now or NBC tonight at 8pm. They are also showing it on VH1.com .  So far Nelly Furtado, Fergie, Tom Jones, Joss Stone, Lily Allen and Duran Duran have performed. Fergie's such a royal lady, so it's no wonder she's there. I'm just glad she kept her bowel movements under control.

 

If the Princes give another speech, I don't think I can keep it together.   

 

 

 

 

 

 

A top British official said that because of specific threats made to Prince Harry and his crew, he will not be going to Iraq after all. Prince Harry was said to be excited and would have been the first British royal to serve in a war since 1982.

 

The 22-year-old is said to be upset, but will not quit the army. When it was announced that he would be going into Iraq, it drew some criticism with some saying that by him being there he's putting other members of the army at risk. 

 

Ironically, Prince Harry hs been trained as a front line solider. Now he's a front line soldier who can't fight!  

 

 

 

 

 

Princess Beatrice of York is the new love of my life. She left a SoHo club in London the other night with vomit or coke on her cheek. She looks like Igor from the Frankenstein movies. The 18-year-old ran up a $10,000 booze bill before she left. $10k in booze?!!!!! Are they selling coke at that club as well.

 

Bea is the daughter of Fergie (not Fuggie).

 

Isn't she so beautiful and elegant? I really need to move to England.

 

Source: Daily Mail