Nerds

Ninja Vigilantes Busted In New Jersey

The streets of Clifton, NJ are a little less safe today after cops arrested two vigilante ninjas who were trying to rid the area of drugs dealers. Cops found Tadieusz Tertkiewicz, 20, and Jesse Trojaniak, 19, sitting in their car, dressed like ninjas. The Detective Captain said they were "wearing tactical vests and armed with knives in sheaths at their waists along with Ninja throwing knives, Chinese throwing stars, four-pointed tacks, swords, bows and arrows." I'm sure all their weapons were plastic and can be found at your local Toys 'R Us.

The sad pair told cops they are known on the streets as The Shinobi Warriors. They were on their way to deliver menacing letters to drug dealers. One of the letters said that the “Shinobi will stop your cruel and sadistic intentions with justified yet, merciful force" and accused dealers and junkies of committing "sins of passing impurity." It's not known how many letters were left on the doors of drug dealers and users. The dudes said that if they were ever confronted by a dealer, they would use their awesome martial arts skills and weapons on them!

Oh and one of those threatening letters was delivered to Tadieusz's ex-girlfriend. A nerd with a broken heart is sad thing.

They were both charged with weapons possession. Tadieusz was also charged with harassment. He's still in jail on $20,000 bail. Jesse was released.

First of all, what do you expect from a dude who has a Vanilla Ice haircut. Second of all, this is exactly why video game nerds should never leave their parents' basement. There's a reason why they spend the rest of their lives playing video games, eating Hot Pockets and getting yelled at by their mom for leaving chunky skid mark stains on their chonies. When they enter the wild, shit like this happens!

Source

Thanks Marcia



Trekkie Love

The teaser trailer for the new Star Trek movie leaked. It's playing before Cloverfield. It's just a teaser, so nothing to burst your nerd wad over. I screwed a few Trekkies over the years, so I consider myself an official one. If you have had at least 5 Trekkie dicks in you that means you are official. It's in the rulebook. Check!

The movie comes out this Christmas and stars that dude from Heroes as Spock.


Source: NewsRadio

Thanks Jay



Not The Kind Of Wood I Had In Mind

That's not the wood I wanted to see Owen Wilson! Get a clue.

Owen is in Hawaii with Woody Harrelson and his wife. Owen's trunks were way too loose. His body's nothing to cream to, but I'm more interested in seeing the real butterscotch stallion. Where's the tent?

Splash



"Ah Stole Sumpin!"

 
TMZ has a video of Brit Brit paying for some gum at a gas station. She starts to leave, but quickly turns around and grabs a lighter and walks out saying to the camera "I stole something, Oh I'm bad!" ARREST HER!
 
The lighter costs $1.39 and the owner of the Chevron told People he wants his money. "Yes, Britney stole a blue lighter here last night. The lighter is $1.39. I'm hoping maybe the next time she comes back she will pay for it. I know she can afford to pay for it, but I'm not planning to file a police report. It's still not right for her to steal the lighter. I hope she will do the right thing the next time she comes here."
 
I say file a police report and arrest the bitch! KFed's lawyers are probably adding this to their "DUMBASS" file on Britney.
 
Click here to see the video
 
 


Fabio Is So Effin Classy

 
Ever since Fabio got a little more fame for that George Clooney spat, he just won't let go. Fabio spoke to OK! Magazine about the whole ordeal. Such a drama queen. Save it for your romance novels.
 
“I was doing a charity for the 11-99 Foundation, which benefits the widows and children of officers killed in the line of duty." Saint Fabio!
 
He goes on to say that a drunk Clooney started insulting a woman at his table and flipping them off. He said he got up and told Clooney what's what and Clooney "got a little scared." I don't blame him. Fabio is such a macho man. He's about as macho as a pair of pink, fuzzy dice. 
 
And he goes on, “He has no class. You have to be a low-class, scumbag to start calling a woman a name. If you’re a man, you should never. You should be a gentleman. These women were with me and as a man I defend them. He was lucky he ran out of the restaurant. He’s not even half a man.”
 
When I read Fabio's quotes I totally read it in his Italian accent. It kind of turns me on that way. If Clooney's not half a man then Fabio is a full donkey. That didn't make any fucking sense, but you get it.
 
 


The Greatest Lawsuit Of All-Time

 
A South Carolina inmate has filed a $63 Billion lawsuit against NFL star and dog fighter Michael Vick. The man claims that Michael stole his pitbulls and sold them on eBay to buy missiles from Iran reports Fox News.
 
The dude filed the handwritten complaint last month.
 

The man alleges that Vick stole two white mixed pit bull dogs from his home in Holiday, Fla., and used them for dogfighting operations in Richmond, Va. The complaint goes on to allege that Vick sold the dogs on eBay and “used the proceeds to purchase missiles from the Iran government.”

The complaint also alleges that Vick would need those missiles because he pledged allegiance to Al Quaeda in February of this year.

“Michael Vick has to stop physically hurting my feelings and dashing my hopes,” Riches writes in the complaint.

Riches wants $63 billion dollars “backed by gold and silver “ delivered to the front gates to the Williamsburg Federal Correctional facility in South Carolina. Riches is an inmate at the facility serving out a wire fraud conviction.

Hey, I believe him. Award him the $63 Billion! Click here to see the rest of these documents. It's art, HIGH ART. It seriously belongs in a fine museum.

 

 



Spot The Douche!

 
How could these morons all gather in the same room? I would think the joint would explode from the extreme "toolism." Yes, that's KFed, Pete Wentz, DJ Steve Aoki, Benji Madden, Cisco Adler and Joel Madden in Brett Ratner's basement!
 
They shot this picture to go along with an article in Vanity Fair , yes VF, about how hooking up with startlets have taken these dude's fame to the next level.
 
You can read the article here , it's damn six pages long. What the hell is there to say about these asses that takes six pages?! I would think it would only take six letters: DOUCHE.
 
VIA ONTD
 
 


Patrick Dempsey Is A Pretty, Pretty Princess

 
Pink is definitely not Patrick Dempsey's color. Oh the things you do for a check! Patrick was photographed in NYC while shooting his new movie "Made of Honor." It's about a dude who's in love with an engaged woman and tries to win her love when she asks him to be her maid of honor. I liked it better when it was called "My Best Friend's Wedding" and starred Julia Roberts. 
 
 
Splash
 
 
 


Ugh, My 3-Month Old iPod is Already Ancient!

iphone1.jpg

As expected, Apple announced the new iPhone today. Steve Jobs introduced the touch-screen phone that will integrate features from the iPod with a mobile phone. The phone does everything from play music, search the web, wipe your ass, slap your kid, fight with your mom and serve you corndogs in 9 different flavors.

Visit Gizmodo to hear all about the 1,998,444 features this thing has to offer.



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