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Local roving news reporters are comedians! In case you missed it, here's a clip of a totally hot news reporter going off after something flies into his mouth. Did one of Parasite Hilton's vag maggots grow wings, fly to the country and right into that dude's mouth, because he acts like he's just tasted death. I mean, I've had some fucked up things in mouth and I've never given that kind of reaction.

"I'm dying in this fucking country ass fucked up town!" He should write for the movies!

Thanks Char & Soulgrrl

Tricia Walsh-Smith, YouTube superstar and warrior, is back fighting the good fight. This time she's making her videos from her new London apartment. In this edition of the "Crazy Eyes Diaries, " Tricia talks about her career, her booze addiction and the comments she's received from women-hating men.

Skip to about 3:25 to watch Tricia bust a move like a virgin at their high school prom. Tricia starts breaking it down to a song called "Bonkers." Methinks she hears this song in hear head 24/7. That would explain her magnificent bulging eyeballs! She screams, "I'm going bonkers" at the end of the song. No truer words have EVER been spoken.

At the end of the video, Tricia gives us the information for her new PayPal account to send her money to cover her court costs. She's saying this from her gorgeous and probably expensive London apartment.

That being said, I'm totally sending her a $1!!! Love this crazy-eyed hotness!

Thanks Rory

Bill O'Reilly is a dick and guess what? Billy has always been a dick! Here's a little behind-the-scenes clip from the old days of Billy getting his diapers in a bunch on the set of Inside Edition over some words on the teleprompter. Billy goes through several takes, but finally explodes and screams, "FUCK IT! Do it live! I'll write it and we'll do it live! Fucking thing sucks!" Hahah. I like it when Billy gets mad. His little cotton candy hair bounces up and down.

You know the next day the teleprompter read, "Fuck you Bill! Do it live!"

VIA Gawker

Thanks Ghost

What the fuckity fuck did I just watch? Am I high? Did somebody slip me an acid tab?

I watched this mess at least 5 times and I still have ten thousand questions.

Okay, this short movie was made from the 20s or 30s. It's apparently a series of shorts. This one is called "Trouble" and stars Queenie the dog as some sort of tart who finds herself in a situation with some gangster dog. By situation I mean he's assaulting her ass. The most disturbing thing about this little clip, is that the dogs walk on their hind legs the whole time. I don't even want to know how they got the dogs to do that.

I must go and cuddle with my dog now and promise him that I'll never make him wear clothes again.

VIA Best Week Ever

YouTube's newest superstar sensation, Tricia Walsh-Smith, is no longer allowed to make those mesmerizing YouTube rants.......in her Park Avenue apartment. The judge said Tricia can continue to make the videos and say whatever she wants as long as it's not in the apartment she once shared with her husband, Philip Smith.

Yay! Tricia is going on location!

Mr. Smith's lawyer told The New York Post, "If there's a way we thought we could stop [Walsh-Smith], we would do so." There's no stopping crazy eyes! Sorry. Well, maybe if they squirted a little glycerine on her eyes.

77-year-old Mr. Smith is divorcing 52-year-old Tricia, because he claims she treated him like shit. He is also having her evicted from their apartment. In her latest YouTube video, she asked viewers to take up a collection for her to buy a tent.

I don't give a fuck if she shoots her videos in a tent, subway bathroom, Charles Manson's prison cell or Clay Aiken's lingerie closet. I just care that she continues to make these videos for YouTube!

Here crazy eyes have hypnotized me into adoring her.

Image: Fame

Tricia Walsh-Smith and her crazy eyes have returned! Tricia is the socialite who went on YouTube a couple of weeks ago to rant about her husband, some rich bitch named Philip Smith, who is evicting her from their multi-million dollar NYC apartment. In the first video, Tricia went on about her husband never fucked her. If you haven't seen it, click here to watch it. It's a must.

Tricia has put out a sequel and it's just as amazing. I don't understand why Tricia just doesn't look her husband in the eyes and hypnotize his ass with those crazy eyes of hers. Shit, she's almost got me hypnotized. I'm ready to empty out my checking account for her.

Tricia is also sick of being "slagged" and "slandered" by commenters. I love her ass! If Tricia gets evicted, she can come live with me. I will use Tricia's crazy eyes to hypnotize my super into finally fixing the water pressure. Tricia can do anything!

Remember Matt's ex-boyfriend on "Melrose Place" that came to visit him for a few episodes? The dude turned about to be a closeted Navy lieutenant. I think the dude even told Matt he was HIV positive. Matt learned something about himself from him and blah...blah...blah.. Life lessons. It was a "very important" Melrose Place. So.......that dude made this YouTube video cursing Scientology.

Jason Beghe was a member of Scientology since the 90s. He even appeared in some promo spots. Well, he's escaped Tom Cruise's clutches and now he's speaking out. In this 3-minute video, he says shit like, "Scientology is destructive and a rip-off."

He also said, "It’s very, very dangerous for your spiritual, psychological, mental, emotional health and evolution. I think it stunts your evolution. If Scientology is real, then something’s fucked up." Jason uses Scientology lingo in the video and claims he was a top Scientologist or OT 5. Jason said the higher he went up in the church, the worse it got.

Jason spent a lot of cash and time on Scientology and it hasn't delivered what it promised.

The video is just a teaser to a much longer video that is coming out soon.

I'm glad I have lovely memories of Jason as Matt's gay Navy lover on Melrose Place, because those are probably the last memories I will have of him. Jason better be living in some underground city, because bitch is in danger.

He also does the best Tom Cruise impersonation at around 2:27. Something tells me Tom isn't laughing about this video now.

Gawker posted this video from the famous Charleston Fashion Week of a woman falling through a catwalk. I've watched it a dozen times and laughed each time. I'm pretty sure the woman is not a model, but probably the designer. She sort of wanders out onto the catwalk like someone's pushed her out. She takes her bow and tries to cross to the other side of the catwalk, but ends up falling through. And then she totally disappears!

She totally ended up in Narnia.

This mindless shit is perfect for hangover Sunday. It's from the German show "Wetten, dass...?" and features a dude crushing cans with his shoulder blades over and over again. I think I've watched it 20 times. It's doing wonders for my hangover. This was on the biggest show in Germany! Seriously, I need to move to Berlin already.

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Thanks Klatsch

Obama has that hot chick as his Obama Girl and John McCain has these lovely ladies. It fits. These are The McCain Girls and they put out some shit on YouTube of them singing along to one of the gayest songs in history: "It's Raining Men." They cleverly changed the title to "It's Raining McCain."

My favorite of the three is the woman that looks like Bonnie Brindle from "Small Wonder." First of all, her pants are melting into the green screen. Second of all, she barely knows the lyrics. Those two other chicks probably needed a third and nobody would do it, so they kidnapped poor Bonnie Brindle from the local supermarket and brainwashed her to shake her granny ass for John McCain! Bonnie definitely doesn't know what she's doing.

I couldn't get through the whole thing, because I had to turn it off once one of them washed her face with John McCain. That's crossing the line of decency.

VIA Gawker