Jessica Alba
Monday, July 30th 2007
Cash Is A Dumb Bitch
Friends of Cash Warren claim that Jessica Alba dumped his ass, because he wasn't ready for marriage and she was.
A source said, "It's simple as that. It's kind of cold that the press is saying she was just finished with him, because it isn't like that."
This source went on to say that seeing Eva LongWHORIA get married made Alba realize how much she wanted a wedding. "Seeing Eva get married made Jessica wistful. That was the reason Jessica seemed to be in a terrible mood in Paris."
If this is true, he's a dumb bitch. Cash is not living up to his name. I say marry her, take that money and dump her ass! I know...I know...he probably has morals.
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Wednesday, July 25th 2007
Jessica Alba Isn't In Love With Cash Warren Anymore
UsWeekly claims Jessica Alba called up her boyfriend of 2 1/2 years, Cash Warren, and told him "I'm not in love with you anymore." Jessica is currently overseas promoting "Fantastic Four." Hours after telling him she was done with him, Jessica had her assistant in Los Angeles go to her home and pack all his shit up.
A friend close to Cash said it happened out of nowhere. "[Cash] thinks it's for another guy but doesn't know....he's totally devastated. But it was all her."
Jessica has been rumored to be dating 50 Cent, but who knows? Her career is taking off, so she probably wants someone more high-profile.
There were also rumors that she "interviewed" for the role of Mrs. Tom Cruise before Katie. HAH!
Saturday, July 7th 2007
It's Finally Over!
After a million months of hearing about it, Eva Longoria's huge wedding to Tony Parker is finally over! The pair married for the second time this week in front of 250 guests at the Church of Saint Germain l'Auxerrois in France.
Eva wore wore a couture Angel Sanchez mermaid gown made of silk wool, with silk gazar metallic embroidery, a scoop back and a long train. Yeah, snoozeville. I hope they made a chiffon muzzle, because chick likes to talk.
Guests included Felicity Huffman, Nicollette Sheridan, Felicity Huffman, Teri Hatcher, Sheryl Crow and Jessica Alba. After the ceremony guests headed for a fancy castle outside of Paris for some grub.
Guests were also asked to hand over all cell phones and cameras before entering. Eva and Tony have a signed a strict deal with OK! Magazine for the exclusive photos for a whopping $2 million.
I would've snuck a camera in my poop shoot and taken pictures of her just to foil her plan! If pictures of Eva in her gown leaks before the magazine comes out, she's screwed!
Nicollette looks way hot. Probably hotter than the bride. What a bitch!
Thursday, June 14th 2007
Jessica Alba Got Paris Fired?
Did Jessica Alba get Paris Hilton's ass fired from her agency? Ok! Magazine reports that Jessica wasn't happy she had the same agent as Paris and ordered she be dropped. Apparently other A-listers followed Alba in wanting Paris out.
A source said, “They were getting a lot of pressure from bigger clients to get rid of Paris. None of them wanted to have the same agents as Paris; she’s an embarrassment to any real artist.”
“Jessica is the anti-Paris — a real star who hates the silly L.A. party scene that Paris reigns over. She made it clear to the folks at Endeavor — either Paris goes or she goes.”
Alba also showed her hate for Paris when a reporter told her that her hair in The Fantastic 4 looked like Paris Hilton's. Jessica was heard telling her handler, "Was he telling me I look like a jailbird? That was just so out of order."
Now if Alba can just use your bitchiness and hotness to keep Paris in jail for life! That would make her a real life superhero.
Saturday, June 2nd 2007
Jessica Alba Looks Like Shit
Clown face alert! Jessica Alba usually looks pretty hot, but at the ALMA awards last night she looked a mess. She looks like she had her make-up done by Krusty the Clown. Ugh, this bitch is played out.
Thursday, May 31st 2007
STFU Alba
Jessica Alba had an interview with Parade Magazine and I wish she didn't. I kind of like her and just when I'm letting my guard down, ho starts spewing crap.
Alba on being a sex symbol:
“I don’t really pay attention to all that. It’s only when people start to treat me like one that it really freaks me out. Most days I wake up and look in the mirror and go, ‘ugh.’ I don’t really think I look all that great.”
Alba on working in a man's world:
“I’m in a business that’s completely driven by white males. The majority of writers and directors are men. And even though I’m not, like, such a huge feminist, I do want to produce movies on my own that are female-driven and empowering to women. Variety is good. The woman’s voice really isn’t present in Hollywood.”
Alba on the paps:
“I could give two sh-ts about them. They’re so lame, I can’t even believe that’s a real job. I can’t imagine they even pay taxes.”
Feminist? She's a regular Gloria Steinem that one! I haaattte when hot chicks don't know they are hot. I mean she has to know it.
When I look in the mirror in the morning Alba, I vomit and then I cry and then I try again and then I vomit again. So I guess going "ugh" isn't all that bad, now is it?!
Source: US Weekly
Saturday, April 21st 2007
Over for Jessica & Cash?
Jessica Alba and Cash Warren are said to be done. The longtime lovers apparently ended their love affair over a week ago according to JanetCharlton.com . Friends of the couple say that Cash was too busy working and Jessica was always away. Cash was supposed to take Jessica to Coachella later this month, but that's off. They two were hoping to keep it civil, but apparently aren't talking.
Other sources claim the couple are still together. I don't know what to believe?! Do I care? Not sure.
I'm sure Jessica isn't crying. She just signed a $5 million deal with Revlon. She won't have a problem finding a new dude.
Monday, January 8th 2007
Is She Helping Her Dog Shit?
*Images removed by request, but here's some other images of Jessica at the dog park*
Even the hotness that is Jessica Alba isn't afraid to get her hands dirty (with dog poo poo) while she hangs out with her furry friends and man at a dog park in Los Angeles the other day. Hey, even dogs needs a little help popping the doody bubble.
Image Source: Splash
Tuesday, January 2nd 2007
Is Cash Warren Hot?
Jessica Alba and her longtime boyfriend, Cash Warren, spent their holiday in Miami. You know I can't ever figure out if I think Cash Warren is hot. I mean the Alba is really hot, but is he hot? I mean is her hotness just transferring to him? Is he just average. I'm so confused. Ugh, who am I fooling? I'd hit it harder than Britney hitting the floor on New Year's Eve.
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