Denise Richards

Wednesday, January 30th 2008

The Worst Bond Girl

Entertainment Weekly has named Denise Richards as Dr. Christmas Jones the worst Bond girl of all-time. I agree, but Pierce Brosnan did have the best Bond line ever thanks to Christmas Jones. It was at the end of the movie when Bond and Christmas are doing it on a building or something and he says, "I thought Christmas only came once." I spit out my Mr. Pibb in the movie theater to that line.

Here's the rest of the worst list:

10. Maud Adams as Octopussy in Octopussy
9. Lynn-Holly Johnson as Bibi Dahl in For Your Eyes Only
8. Lois Chiles as Holly Goodhead (amazing name) in Moonraker
7. Cary Lowell as Pam Bouvier in License to Kill
6. Britt Ekland as Mary Goodnight in The Man with the Golden Gun
5. Karin Dor as Helga Brandt in You Only Live Twice
4. Maryam D'Abo as Kara Milovy in The Living Daylights
3. Corrine Clery as Corrine Dufour in Moonraker
2. Tanya Roberts as Stacey Sutton in A View to a Kill
1. Denise Richards as Dr. Christmas Jones in The World is Not Enough

And the best:

10. Carole Bouquet as Melina Havelock in For Your Eyes Only
9. Jill St. John as Tiffany Case in Diamonds are Forever
8. Lotte Lenya as Rosa Klebb in From Russia with Love
7. Michelle Yeoh as Wai Lin in Tomorrow Never Dies
6. Famke Janssen as Xenia Onatopp in Goldeneye
5. Barbara Bach as Anya Amasova in The Spy Who Loved Me
4. Eva Green as Vesper Lynd in Casino Royale
3. Diana Rigg as Tracy Di Vicenzo in On Her Majesty's Secret Service
2. Honor Blackman as Pussy Galore in Goldfinger
1. Ursula Andress as Honey Ryder in Dr. No

Where's Grace Jones, Jane Seymour, Kim Basinger and Teri Snatcher?! Kim, Jane and Teri can all go on the worst list. Grace definitely needed to be on the best. She really should have played James Bond instead, but her Bond girl was one of my faves.

Denise as the worst is on point. Denise as a research scientist? She can't even spell that.

Image: Rope of Silicon

63 comments
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Wednesday, January 23rd 2008

Denise Is Victorious!

Denise Richards is allowed to whore her kids out despite the fact that their father disagrees with it. Denise took Charlie Sheen to family court yesterday after he refused to give permission for his two little girls, Sam & Lola, to participate in a reality show with Denise.

Denise somehow convinced the judge to let her do the show with her girl, but he set certain restrictions. It's unknown what those restrictions are, but Denise is apparently happy with hit.

Oh and I know how she "convinced" him. The same way she "convinced" Charlie to rescue her from Heidi Fleiss' harem!

I want to know the premise of this reality show, because Denise is about as exciting as a warm plate of diarrhea.

Source: iVillage

70 comments


Tuesday, January 22nd 2008

Charlie Won't Let Denise Whore Their Kids Out

PageSix.com reports that Denise Richards is taking Charlie Sheen to court this morning after he refused to allow his kids star in her reality show. Denise is in talks for her own show and wants her two young daughters to co-star in it. Charlie is opposed to this, so they are taking it to Family Court.

Poor Denise. Shouldn't she be allowed to whore out her kids for a quick buck? Denise needs to leave her kids alone and fast forward to where her career is really heading...late night Skinemax flicks! Shannon Tweed isn't getting any younger and she needs a successor. Denise is that bitch.

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Friday, October 26th 2007

Call Girl From The 70s Or Denise Richards?

 
That's a trick question, because wasn't Denise Richards a call girl in the 90s? That's the word on the internet! Anyway, I loooove this hair. All she needs is some terry cloth shorty shorts and a tube top and her look would be complete!
 
Here's Denise at Dr. Rey's shit product launch yesterday. I'm guessing she also visited Dr. Rey earlier for a little plump in the lips.  
 
 
 
 
54 comments


Thursday, October 4th 2007

Charlie's Love Letters To Denise

 
Charlie Sheen recently sent some lovely and touching e-mails to his ex, Denise Richards. Denise included these beautiful sentiments in documents she filed last week in the couple's custody battle.
 
These words are just so beautiful. Charlie is truly an eloquent man. If he wasn't an actor, he should've been a poet. The next Shakespeare if you will.
 
"You are a pig. A sad, jobless pig who is sad and talentless and sad and jobless and evil and a bad mom, so go fuck yourself sad jobless pig."
 
Thoughtful!
 
"You are an evil piece of shit. I can't wait to tell the world what a piece of shit you are. You don't get a fucking dime till this is resolved."
 
Lovely! And that's just some of it! I really hope Charlie puts all these e-mails together one day for a book about love. It will be a Valentine's Day best seller!
 
Oh and Denise also claims Charlie used to visit gay porn sites featuring underaged boys. Oh Denise it was just research! Research for a very special episode of "Two and a Half Men" featuring Chris Hansen from Dateline. 
 
Source: Page Six
 
 
 
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Thursday, September 20th 2007

Give It A Bone!

 
Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen are still fighting. Denise's call girl ass asked a judge to protect her kiddies from Charlie. He fought back by saying Denise doesn't own their children. Good comeback.
 
Denise's attorney said, "She believes that Charlie has significant personal issues which he has failed to address and which require her to take action to protect her children. This is not a vindictive action. Any responsible parent in Denise's shoes would go to the ends of the Earth to protect her children." 
 
The filed papers indicate that Denise is concerned about Charlie's attraction to underaged girls as well as his "illicit behavior" on the internet including showing his dick and bits to people he's chatting with.
 
Um...why haven't we seen these pictures? I wouldn't be opposed to seeing some Charlie Sheen peen. I'm sure it's heavily damaged due to all the action it's gotten with skanky hookers. A peen's a peen though.
 
Charlie denied her accusations and said, "The truth will prevail. It always does." 
 
They need to learn a thing or two from Brit and KFed about how to put together a truly theatrical and dramatic custody battle. This shit is boring. 
 
Source
 
 
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Tuesday, August 7th 2007

Too Much Information

 
Yesterday, it was rumored that Denise Richards asked Charlie Sheen for some of his baby batter to make a third brat. Ewww...I just said baby batter. Denise denied this claim.
 
Charlie confirmed to Entertainment Tonight and The Insider that she wanted some of his stuff. "There was a request for a donation. Without getting into it here. There is a specific document relating to this that I am going to reserve for a court."
 
When asked if he would ever do it, he responded, "I would sooner, in exactly what I'm wearing, walk on the surface of the moon. Does that answer it?"
 
I don't get it. What was he wearing. Does that make any sense? I would like to walk on the moon. That's not every very unpleasant really. Now if he said "I'd rather fuck my urethra with a knife"...then that would make sense. But walking on the moon is cool.
 
Ewww....I still can't get over the baby batter. Nast.
 
 
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Monday, August 6th 2007

No More Mr. Nice Twat

 
Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards are no longer playing nice when it comes to custody and visitation rights of their daughters. Charlie wants to see Denise's call-girl ass in a court to try and get his visitation rights loosened. He no longer wants supervised visits. Denise has demanded that her nanny is at all the visits and friends of Charlie said this is so she can spy on him.
 
Another source said that Denise is jealous of Charlie's new fiancee and that Denise has even asked Charlie to father another child for her. They also claim that Denise loves the spotlight and claimed she sent flowers to Charlie's fiancee after learning about their engagement, but never did.
 
"Denise set it up. Brooke never got the flowers, but she did get a call from Denise saying, 'It's an emergency, come meet me now.' When Brooke met her, there were four paparazzi waiting to take their picture. After the pictures were done, Denise told Brooke, 'It's been taken care of.' "
 
Denise told Page Six that the problem is Charlie and he's trying to mess up the custody agreement. "My mom is going through chemotherapy and I asked Charlie if my mom could see the kids before she got really sick. That's a valid request. He doesn't stick to the schedule he has with the kids - that's not my fault."
 
"I don't want another child right now. I have my hands full and am focusing on my children, my mother and my career. I thought I was past all this stuff."
 
Who do I trust?! I'll go with Denise. Her performance in "Wild Things" moves me to tears everytime.
 
 
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Wednesday, July 11th 2007

She's Lying

 
Charlie Sheen is engaged to his girlfriend of more than a year, real estate investor, Brooke Mueller. He's 41 and she's 29. Denise Richards was asked about the engagement and she had nothing but nice things to say. She was probably clenching her jaw the entire time.
 
She said, "I am genuinely happy for the two of them. In fact, I sent them flowers to congratulate them both. I've spent time with her, and my girls really like her. That's all that matters to me." 
 
Denise was recently dumped by Richie Sambora in Hawaii. She also denies that she paid a match maker $50k to help her find a man. Poor Denise!
 
She may be unlucky in love, but she says hot things. I watched some red carpet interview with her on Access Hollywood or something where they asked her about love advice and she said "I'm the wrong person to give advice. I stole my best friend's husband!"
 
That bitch is hot.
 
Source
 
41 comments


Saturday, June 23rd 2007

Sam Doesn't Look Happy

 
Denise Richards brought daughter, Sam Sheen, out to the opening of "Ratatouille" in Hollywood yesterday. First of all "Ratatouille" is like the dumbest movie title ever, second of all I love the major wonk Sam's sporting. Gives a girl some character. Homegirl doesn't look happy.
 
 
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