Sienna Miller
The White Zone Is NOT For This Shit
The white zone is for immediate unloading and loading only, it's not for slut canoodling! Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty to need unload nuts on each other or drive the fuck off! Of course, the nobody is bothering their asses!
The last time I picked a bitch up from the airport, I had to wait a quick minute for them to run out to the car from baggage claim. It was like 2 seconds. But of course, some traffic officer had to give me lip about it! Bitch even told me to get out of the car. HELL NO. Ho could've had a taser! I'm not going to knowingly walk into a situation that will most likely involve me getting fucking zapped. That's what would've happened to. He would've said some shit, I would've rolled my eyes and ZAP! Just like I'd have mini pork rinds for ass lips. If only Sienna and Balthazar got their asses tasered. The world is not fair.
And I'm trying to stick by my fellow whore with no morals, but she is making it hard by continuing to suck on that bag of dicks! I mean, can Balthazar's peen deep clean her teeth while she's sucking on it? If it can't, then the dick is not worth it. It's a sad day when a big whore gets dickmatized. Do the dick, don't let the dick do you. Stupid bitch!
Here Comes Sienna....
Sienna Miller's vagina of destruction is about to wreak havoc on Manhattan! Playbill has confirmed that my favorite happy homewrecker will make her Broadway debut in Miss Julie this fall. That shit is about fucking in old timey England or something like that. Just expect a lot of nipple slips from Sienna and maybe she'll throw in a crotch slip to really guarantee a Tony nomination.
There's no point in the wives of NYC twisting their husband's dicks like a pretzel and putting a padlock on it. Nope. Sienna Miller's Cloverpussy can bust through chains. Bitch has got the MacGyver of coochies. She can pick a lock with her clit and untie a knot with her labia lips. Skills.
I can't wait for the sluttery that Sienna will bring to NYC.
Sienna On The Loose
When us mega sluts aren't sucking dick in between subway cars after rush hour (sometimes there's nowhere to go), we're getting absolutely wasted. It's a life! Sienna Miller did a little of the latter last night in London. And her ball and chain peen Balthazary Getty was not around. So when the peen is away, the pussy will play.
Sienna left a club with Cillian Murphy and some "Michael Kors after Jenny Craig-looking" gay. If Cillian's wife was smart, she would've put The Club on her husband's dick before he went out with Sienna. Or at least stuck a Lojack in his ass. You know how Sienna plays. When she sees a shiny wedding ring, it's just a matter of time before she's wearing it on her clit.
Russell Crowe Is Too Fat For Sienna Miller
Russell Crowe's movie about Robin Hood is falling apart, because he's a fat old sack of fugness. That's what Page Six claims anyway. According to their sources, Russell's movie Nottingham is a fucking mess, because the bitch is not losing the chunk. Shooting was supposed to start in February, but now that's been pushed to April, because mega slut Sienna Miller quit that bitch.
A source said, "Russell never lost the weight he put on for 'Body of Evidence' - and so the love scenes between him and Sienna would have been laughable. He's so old and fat and she's so young and gorgeous. It's just . . . gross."
A love scene between Sienna and a Seawolf (Russell does kind of look like one) would be believable, because she has a nonpartisan pussy. Sienna has a gift that most sluts would give up their no gag reflex for. She has the ability to make any fuck session work despite any odds. They need to give the whore the credit she deserves!
Anyslutty, the producers are now looking for a fatter, older ho to play Maid Marian. Um. Harvey Fierstein is available!
The movie also has other problems thanks to Russell. He demanded a complete rewrite so that most of the movie's focus is on his big ass. A source said he's also trying to get director Ridley Scott fired.
A studio bitch confirmed that Sienna busted out, but said Ridley is staying.
This is easily solved. Work with what you've got. Bring in Kristie Alley, change the title to Eatingham, rename Russell's character Robin Food, and instead of a Kraft services table, get Claim Jumper to cater that shit. BAM! Problem solved.
Sienna, Sienna, Sienna...
I just want to take Sienna Miller's labia lips in my two hands, shake them and then scream "Wake up, you stupid bitches! Wake the fuck up!" Why in dickmatized hell is this slut still eating on Balthazar Getty's dick cheese?! She is really beginning to piss me off. Earlier this month, Sienna said her party vagina was back on the scene ready to claim more victims and here she is out with Balthazar in London last night. The Sun says that bitches have also seen them holding hands and acting couple-like in London.
This bitch is a disgrace to all shameless whores! She needs to rinse her coochie and mouth out with a mixture of Listerine, holy water and vinegar, so she can get rid of Balthazar's musty peen scent and move on! Any respectable slut would not keep the same dick around this long. Especially married dick. Please, Sienna, let me help you. I'll take you to a dick buffet, so that you can see all the good peen you've been missing out on.
Sienna Miller Is Back On The Prowl
Dig out the chastity belt from the attic and strap it onto your husband immediately, because Sienna Miller's bulldozer vagina is back in business! Sienna told UsWeekly that she finally detached Balthazar Getty's hair peen (I'm assuming) from her snatch after only a few months together and she's single now. Single and ready to mingle...with your husband's dick.
At the Hollywood Dominoes event in London, the happy homewrecker said, "I'm single at the moment, and I'm completely happy with that. It's nice not to have a relationship that the press constantly want to scrutinize and discuss. I'm cool with being on my own."
And the slutty angels in heaven are singing "Whore-a-lujah!"
Balthazar's dick was getting stale and too complicated, so this shit was long overdue. Let the man with the cartoon villain name go back to his wife and let Sienna go back to doing what she does best: sluttin'! I'm really fucking happy to hear this, because I was starting to think that she was actually...um...dickmatized. Note to sluts of the world: The minute you get dickmatized, immediately put your genitals into rehab and cease all contact with said dick. Dickmatization + a shameless slut = DISASTER!
Below is Sienna in her "dick huntin'" dress at that Domino event on Friday night. If you put your ear to the monitor, you can actually hear her vagina crying tears of joy at the fact that it's getting new peen!
Wenn, Wireimage
Sienna Miller Needs To Move On To New Peen
Shameless slut Sienna Miller has given Balthazar Getty way too many hours with her vagina. It's time to fucking move on. What's the point of being a big whore if you're just going to do the same dude over and over again? Sienna might have finally woken up and smelled the jizz, because the Daily Mail reports that she's taken her slut act back to London. However, she didn't leave Balthazar because her cooze was craving new peen, she left after he refused to divorce his wife.
According to friends, these two hos have been fighting constantly in Los Angeles and she's scared that he's going to go back to his wife. " There have been some pretty unpleasant rows, largely over Balthazar’s reluctance to commit. She has really wanted to be able to step out as a couple but Balthazar is very torn over his children and it looks like he might be wanting to go back to his family. Sienna is devastated."
Sienna is devastated, but her vagina is probably jumping for joy and humming "It's Raining Men."
Balthazar still being married isn't the only problem. Sienna wants to booze and party all night, while he would rather stay home and be boring. Balthazar is a recovering drunk, so he's having a hard time dealing with Sienna's ways.
Sienna is surprised that her married boyfriend still wants to be married and he's surprised that his party whore girlfriend still wants to be a party whore? Ugh. Slap them both with a flaccid peen.
Sienna needs to stay in London and re-read the slut's handbook. Specificially, chapter 7: "Married Men are Only Good for Fucking."
Don't Mess With An Über Slut
Leave it to Sienna Miller to turn the pap attention from her homewrecky ways into a money making opportunity! A judge in Britain gave her ass $27,000 in damages after the Daily Star publishes these pictures of her doing dry sex to an elevator door. Okay, she was really trying to hide from the paps. Sienna said she was in "distress" at the time the pictures were taken and the paps were clearly harassing her. Shortly after the pictures were published on September 11th, Sienna's lawyers filed a lawsuit.
In addition to the $27k, the Daily Star was forced to say they are so sowwy for acting like big meanies. They published this statement this morning:
"We accept, as we said in the article, that Ms. Miller was extremely harassed and distressed by persistent pursuit and intimidating tactics adopted by numerous paparazzi in seeking to obtain photographs of her, including the very photograph that we published."We apologize to Sienna for publishing this photograph."
I'm a little disappointed that Sienna sued over this shit. A true hardcore slut would get revenge by fucking all of the editors' spouses, male or female. She could have used that bulldozer vagina of hers to get the last queef! Oh well. Now she can use that $27k to start the Sienna Miller Foundation for Needy Sluts.
Source: E! Online
Double The Crowe
It was already known that Russell Crowe's voluptuous ass would play the Sheriff in Ridley Scott's "Nottingham," but now he's also playing Robin Hood. Ridley said that Russell would play both roles, but he wouldn't comment any further. He only said that Russell as Robin Hood and the Sheriff would be “a good old clever adjustment of characters. One becomes the other. It changes.” Sybil for the Middle Ages!
Ridley also confirmed that shameless slut Sienna Miller is playing Maid Marian. Russell's wife better lock his dick up and pour a little holy water on it to keep it safe from Sienna.
Ridley and Russell should take this concept a step further. Russell should play all the roles. He definitely has the belly of wonder needed to play Friar Tuck. He also has the huge titties for Maid Marian. And Russell likes to sing, so he can easily cover Bryan Adams' "Everything I Do (I Do It For You)." Win!
That's More Like It
It's nice to see that Sienna Miller isn't covering her ho face and cowering in the corner like a shamed hooker. This is exactly how she should carry herself. Eff all those bitches who don't understand the way of the slut. Their genitals will never do the things your genitals can do and they know it!
Here's Sienna and some jolly helper leaving a medical center in Beverly Hills yesterday. You can draw your own conclusions on why she was there. She was probably just getting her vagina rotated and oiled. It's a monthly chore, but all sluts have to do it.
Wenn

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