You know those stories you read that make you think to yourself: “Wow, my life could be going much worse.” Well, Wynonna Judd has a story for you. People reports that 22-year-old Grace Pauline Kelley, Wynonna’s daughter with first husband, Arch Kelley, has been in lock up at West Tennessee State Penitentiary serving hard time since April. Grace ended up in prison for violating the probation she was on for pleading guilty to meth charges. Continue reading
I thought I felt a little earthquake this afternoon and now I know it was from dozens of people in Las Vegas falling over and hitting the ground when Naomi Judd knocked them out with her glamour and gorgeousness.
The temperature in Las Vegas went up at least 100 degrees today and it’s all Naomi Judd’s fault for serving up so much piping hot elegance and exquisiteness at the launch of The Judds’ residency at The Venetian. It even looks like Wynonna Judd’s face melted a little from being so close to her hot mother. Naomi Judd’s face gets straights As. I don’t even care if it looks like her left eyebrow took a bite out of her right eyebrow. Her eyebrow game gets an A+, her lip liner game gets an A++ and those spider lashes get an A+++. Naomi Judd looks like the most opulent Christmas tree topper of all time. Liberace would so put her on top of his tree. There really are no words. This is perfection and everybody in the world should strive to look like this!
File this under: The Judds are still a MESS!
I didn’t think anybody was regularly checking for Ashley Judd (see: movie producers, her agent, voters in Kentucky, etc…), but I’m wrong as usual, because her own sister was. Well, she was checking on her car anyway. The Tennessean says that last month Ashley Judd told the police that her sister Wynonna Judd put a GPS tracking device on a silver Mini Cooper she owns. Ashley filed a police report and in it she says that she, Wynonna and another person, whose identity was kept out of the report, are going through some kind of drama. TMZ says the other person is Wynonna’s 17-year-old daughter Grace.
Ashley told police that Grace took her Mini Cooper to a repair shop in Franklin, Tennessee and the mechanic found a black box behind the passenger seat and inside that black box was a GPS tracking device (DUN DUN DUN). The cops later found out that the GPS tracking device was registered to a private investigator in Nashville. Ashley told police that she thinks Wynonna snuck that shit in there and is trying to track a ho the same way Ewan McGregor tracked Ashley in her greatest movie of all-time Eye of the Beholder.
TMZ says that Wynonna told police that it was all just one big misunderstanding. Wynonna wasn’t trying to track Ashley. Wynonna was trying to track her daughter Grace who regularly drives that Mini Cooper.
I don’t know why Wynonna’s trying to track her daughter’s every move, but I do know she needs to get better at it. Who leaves a black box lying behind the passenger seat like that? Even the Detectives Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen wouldn’t make that mistake. Why bother hiding a GPS device in your kid’s car to stalk them when there’s an app for that?
These Judds. So messy. So dramatic. The pristine blossom of the Judd family, Naomi Judd, needs to take off her wig and slap both of them with it.
And James Patterson will turn this shit into a novel in 3..2..