I haven’t checked yet, but I’m assuming that right now, the Palestinians and Israelis are holding hands after declaring peace. Because they figured that if LeAnn Rimes and Brandi Glanville can call a truce for at least one second, so can they.
Mariah Carey Has Been Hit With Another Sexual Harassment Lawsuit Threat, And This One’s From Her Ex-Manager
Late last year, one Mariah Carey’s ex-bodyguards Michael Anello threatened to sue the unicorn one for almost $750,000 for not paying invoices and sexually harassing him by bouncing around him in see-through lingerie that exposed her Hello Titty nipples to him. That lawsuit hasn’t been filed yet, but Mimi’s lawyers got a new legal threat to deal with. Stella Bulochnikov used to be Mimi’s manager, and when she wasn’t allegedly causing everyone to hate her, she was orchestrating great career moves for Mimi, like that scripted turd of a reality show. Stella and Mimi broke up last year. At the time, the story went that Stella quit Mimi, because she couldn’t deal with Mimi acting an erratic mess (which was probably from her bipolar II disorder). But it turns out that Mimi quit Stella, and now Stella is threatening to sue for breach of contract and sexual harassment. Just like Michael Anello, Stella claims that the Elusive Chanteuse is elusive when it comes to covering up her parts around her employees.
Satan is probably not shivering his frozen ass cheeks off in Hell today. And Harvey Weinstein has not been seen flying over Arizona (no offense to actual pigs, they deserve better than that). So Karl Lagerfeld answered a question about #MeToo in exactly the way you’d expect Karl Lagerfeld to answer a question about #MeToo. Kunty Karl couldn’t hate the #MeToo movement more if it was a Pippa Middleton-faced fat Meryl Streep fan.
Two of Donald Trump’s alleged side pieces, Stormy Daniels and Karen McDougal, both said that he raw-dogged them. So I doubt that one layer of shock covered the face of anyone who read the rumor about how he’s got a secret love child out there. Shit, because Trump seems to be into busting raw orange nuts into his side tricks, I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s got a whole secret love child army out there. And yes, that’s the face he makes when he busts a raw orange nut into his side tricks. I hope you weren’t in the middle of eating slightly curdled cream of pumpkin soup.
But the story isn’t that Trump maybe-boned a secret love child into one of his mistresses. It’s that The National Enquirer may have once again bought a story and killed it to protect him during the 2016 presidential election.
It’s been 10 years since Daddy Spears used his Velveeta grits-stirring wooden ladle to weave some magic around and save his double deep fried pork rind fritter from further sliding into a messy puddle of tragicness during her mental breakdown. Britney Spears’ dad Jamie Spears became the boss of her life in 2008 after she shaved her head, tried to murder a pap’s SUV with an umbrella and did a barefoot walking tour through all the gas stations in Los Angeles County. Yes, it’s been 10 years. We’re really going to need a “Where Are They Now?”, because I lay awake at night sometimes and think, “For where art thou, Assistant Carla?”
UsWeekly is hearing that Daddy Spears is looking into taking a sledgehammer to his 36-year-old daughter’s shackles and set her free.
THE QUEEN loves to guzzle down the sweet nectar, so I figured that she spent many a night bonding with her ginger grandson by doing shots of the good stuff in between crank calling Camilla and gently putting Prince Philip’s hand in warm water after he passes out on a pile of Corgis in the corner of the throne room. So I always figured that Prince Hot Ginge was the ginger apple of THE QUEEN’s eye, and it was 100% confirmed this morning when her official announcement of consent was released.