Category: Twitter
A BAFTA Producer Defended Ariana DeBose’s Opening Rap After Twitter Dragged It
Sunday night’s BAFTA Awards featured a opening musical number performed by Oscar-winning triple threat Ariana DeBose. After host Richard E. Grant (mmmm [just me?]) kicked off the show with a monologue, 32-year-old Ariana burst onto the stage with her back-up dancers and sang “Sisters Are Doing It For Themselves” and “We Are Family”. OK, sure! But it’s what happened next that shook viewers to their core. Ariana transitioned into an original rap saluting the award show’s female nominees. By this point, our gal was out of breath. As she struggled to spit out lyrics like, “Hong Chau, Dolly de, Kerry and Carey with a C!”, the BAFTA director insisted on cutting to every woman Ariana namechecked. Their reactions ranged from unimpressed (Ana de Armas), concerned (Kerry Condon), to politely supportive (Emma Thompson). Even though the performance was a damn mess, the BAFTAs believed it was “iconic,” and posted a clip to their Twitter page. Big mistake, HUGE. Twitter did what Twitter does, and completely eviscerated poor Ariana and the rap. Continue reading
After Elon Musk’s Super Bowl Tweet Flopped, He Made Engineers Change The Algorithm To Boost His Tweets
During Sunday’s Super Bowl, Elon Musk tweeted, “Go @Eagles!!!” with a bunch of American flag emojis. A couple of hours later, he deleted it. Was Elon embarrassed the Philadelphia Eagles lost? Nope. He was embarrassed that his tweet only got 9.1 impressions (views), while Joe Biden’s pro-Eagles tweet got 29 million. That night, a pissed-off Elon flew his private jet back to the Bay Area to “demand answers” from Twitter employees. According to Platformer, Elon threatened to fire his remaining engineers unless they built a system to promote his tweets. On Monday afternoon, when people who hadn’t blocked Elon Musk (fools!) opened Twitter, their timelines were filled with Elon posts. To quote the original Buzz Lightyear, “You are a sad, strange little man.”
Beyonce’s Multimillion Dollar Cell-Phone Restricted Performance In Dubai Was, Of Course, Leaked To The Public
Beyonce is about to make zillions off of her upcoming tour, but that’s still not good enough for her. Since we know her first love will always be a check, Beyonce packed up Jay-Z and the rest of their brood for an exclusive VIP performance at Dubai’s brand new hotel for high rollers, Atlantis The Royal. And in an attempt to keep the riff-raff (ie, “poor people“) from experiencing such opulence, the hotel put a restriction on anyone trying to use their cell phones to capture a glimpse of Beyonce’s performance. Of course, that didn’t work at all.
Twitter Is Going Crazy Over A Rumor That Aaron Taylor-Johnson Cheated On His Wife With Joey King
SO. There’s an Internet rumor going around that Aaron Taylor-Johnson had an affair with his Bullet Train co-star, Joey King. Neither party is single: 23-year-old Joey is engaged to 30-year-old producer/director Steven Piet, and as we all know, 32-year-old Aaron has been with his wife, 55-year-old director Sam Taylor-Johnson, for 13 years. Now, when a celebrity cheating rumor breaks, people tend to take the side of the cheated-on (see: John Mulaney and Anna Marie Tendler). But Sam has long been criticized as a “groomer” because she pursued Aaron when she directed him in the 2009 film Nowhere Boy (POWER IMBALANCE). He was 18, and she was 42 (AGE GAP). Sam offered Aaron the role in the movie following a private audition at her house (WEIRD). The couple announced their engagement in October 2009, and Sam gave birth to their first daughter the following summer (FAST). This is all to say: Twitter hates Sam, and they’re pretty much throwing a party over these totally unfounded Joey-Aaron rumors.
Chrissy Teigen Wanted To Know If Getting A Bikini Wax While Pregnant Was Way More Painful, So She Asked Twitter
As we know, Chrissy Teigen is pregnant again. Her and John Legend’s baby should be here any day now, and she must be bored, in need of attention, or a combination of the two; because she recently took a break from ripping off cake mixes to take to messy-ass Twitter to ask 12.9 million of her closest pals if getting her pregnant fur-burger waxed would hurt just a little bit worse than normal or excruciatingly worse. She got a mixed bag of answers–and I got a definitively icked bag of mental images.
Cardi B Responds To People Who Say She Has No Right To Complain About The Rising Price Of Groceries Because She’s Rich
Long gone are the days when you could go to the grocery store and purchase eggs and bacon without it costing $150. And these overly inflated prices aren’t just affecting those of us surviving on ramen and crumbs shook from the toaster. The high prices are also eating away at the rich, summoning constant champion of complaining Cardi B to inform us she, too, is one of the people. Well, not really, since “the people” aren’t worth tens of millions of dollars, but according to Cardi, that’s almost as much as what it costs to feed her family, and she thinks it’s absolutely ridiculous. But of course, Twitter isn’t here for her whining, so she responded in true Cardi fashion.