In case you didn’t know that the week leading up to Christmas is usually slower than a coked-up sloth’s cum shot, take a look at that headline again.
The beef of our time started yesterday when 27-year-old Sarah Hyland (she’s the brown-haired daughter on Modern Family who isn’t my style icon Ariel Winter) Crisco’d up her face, put razors in her hair and had a friend hold her bag so she could drag CVS out onto the Twitter yard and fight them. Sarah called CVS out for closing before she could pick up some very important medication. That led to CVS apologizing to Sarah, which led to her accusing them of not caring, which led to them saying that they do care, which led to Sarah posting several videos about the situation. It’s times like these when we should thank Twitter for existing so that celebrities like Sarah can publicly bitch out a corporation for fucking her over and us bloggers can make a long post about it during a slow pre-holiday week. Thank you, Baby Jesus, for giving us Twatter!
Rose McGowan has been spitting hot truth on Twitter for a while now, but the implosion of Harvey Weinstein’s career has caused people to really pay attention. As it turns out, Twitter hasn’t been so crazy about what Rose has been serving, and they suspended her account.
While promoting her upcoming album Witness earlier this month, Katy Perry strongly implied there would be no bitchy follow-up to Taylor Swift’s Katy Perry-hating song Bad Blood. It was almost as if Katy had matured out of their tired middle school fight. Hahahaha, how silly and naive we all were! But of course Katy still wants to scratch at Taylor.
Not that I’m hating on Andy Cohen’s shit-stirring antics, because they do give me something to post about. So shit-stir on, you shady bitch.
This past election was such a horrifying shit show (not that the current state of crap is any better) that it destroyed lives, ruined relationships and caused gingers to turn against each other. Mega example: The Queen of the Bernie Bros., Susan Sarandon, and Ride Or Die For Hillary team leader, Debra Messing. Their Twitter feud all started before Hillary Clinton won the Democratic nomination. Susan said that if the presidential showdown came down to Trump and Clinton, some Bernie Bros. would not be able to vote for Clinton. Also, while perched on her rich lady throne, Susan said that Trump’s win could bring on the revolution. Debra dragged Susan for that and it was on. One month after Susan and Debra’s Twitter fight royale, Susan was on Watch What Happens Live where she said that Debra needed a hobby. Susan was on Watch What Happens Live again on Monday and Andy Cohen brought out a microwave-safe dish to reheat the ginger beef between her and Debra.
The picture you see above was taken several years ago. I’m pointing this out, because after what happened between Kid Cudi, Kanye West, and Drake on Twitter last night has probably killed any chance that Kid Cudi will ever be on the same stage as a smiling Kanye West ever again. Although I feel like neither of them are dabbing at tears with their hankies over that thought.
Just when this whole Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne breaking up ESCANDALO was dying down and the media was moving on, Kelly Osbourne has stepped onto the stage and has kept it alive by dousing it with gallons of pure liquid foolery. If this entire thing really is a shameless stunt to promote The Talk and Black Sabbath’s tour, then Sharon Osbourne should give Kelly a huge bonus, because she sicced her followers on her dad’s supposed ex-side ho and has screamed “ELDER ABUSE!”