Category: This Is News

IMPORTANT BREAKING NEWS: Prince Hot Ginge And Meghan Markle Went Christmas Tree Shopping

December 13, 2016 / Posted by:

Believe it or not, but when Prince Hot Ginge wants a Christmas tree, he doesn’t command his henchmen to gallop deep into the forest, find the most majestic fir tree and evict all of the woodland creatures from it (by order of the ginger prince!) before cutting it down and bringing it back to the palace. PHG shops for a Christmas tree like a regular, because he’s real like that.

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BREAKING: Jennifer Garner And Ben Affleck Are Still Doing Beverage-Holding Pap Strolls Together

November 28, 2016 / Posted by:

When we last left the never-ending boring vanilla saga that is Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck’s separation, he was reportedly itching to officially put his man tits back on the market by divorcing her. Ben probably wanted to divorce Jennifer right away because his mid-life crisis isn’t fully complete until he quickie marries a 19-year-old Instagram model in Las Vegas. Jennifer was supposedly trying to push back their divorce plans and probably because she’s just not ready to do coffee runs in front of the paparazzi by herself just yet.

Yet another “Ben And Jen Reconcile!” headline was born this weekend when the two took their kids to church. They also got coffee together at their favorite place Farmshop in the Brentwood Country Mart this morning.

Something in Farmshop’s half & half ain’t clean about this…

I refuse to believe that there’s two rich and separated Hollywood types out there who have the ability to actually play nice for the sake of anything including their kids and images. Maybe Jennifer has been secretly getting revenge on that (alleged) nanny fucker by spiking his Farmshop coffee with breast enhancing vitamins. That would explain his luscious chichis. Yeah, I’ll go with that. And I bet that Farmshop hopes these two never ever get divorced. It seems like they get coffee there together every damn hour, so the second they divorce and go their separate ways, Farmshop will have to declare bankruptcy.

Pics: FameFlynet, Wenn.com, Splash

Corey Feldman Is Sorry For Dropping The American Flag

October 14, 2016 / Posted by:

During Corey Feldman’s triumphant comeback performance on Today yesterday, many were so mesmerized and hypnotized by his artistry and graceful moves that they didn’t even notice that he committed an unforgivable attack on this country by dropping the American flag. I noticed, and figured it was either nothing or Corey was declaring his allegiance to Russia. But some who did notice, immediately went into OUTRAGE mode and tweeted that he needed to apologize for being so damn disrespectful or take his commie ass out of this country!

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Hmmm… I Guess Taylor Swift Needs More Material For Her Next Album

September 29, 2016 / Posted by:

And that is definitely the look from a swan pool toy who so badly wants to throw itself off of that edge.

A couple of weeks ago, Calvin Harris released what many thought was a Taylor Swift diss track, and for reasons that only her PR Team knows of, she didn’t respond by rushing out her new single: a cover of Hey Mr. DJ called Hey Mr. DJ, Go Fudge Yourself (she’s not trying to get that parental guidance label). But TMZ says that the two julienned pieces of unseasoned cauliflower stalk don’t hate each other anymore. They’re texting each other again and the texts from Calvin don’t say: I h8 U and if we did more than hump each other over our bed clothes I would’ve given you THE CLAP and been happy about it!

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