Category: The Rolling Stones

Keith Richards Quit Smoking After 55 Years

March 16, 2022 / Posted by:

In a shocking turn of events, Keith Richards is no longer a smoker. 78-year-old Keith revealed the news in a recent interview with CBS Sunday Morning. Keith says that he quietly quit two years ago, after 55 straight years of ciggie-suckin’. A reminder that, back in 2018, he announced he’d essentially given up drinking (save for the occasional glass of wine or pint of beer). He also quit cocaine in 2006 and heroin in 1978. Which means Keith Richards is… straight edge?! Great, yet another sign of the Apocalypse.

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The “One World: Together At Home” Concert Happened Last Night

April 19, 2020 / Posted by:

The One World: Together at Home global concert event happened last night, featuring a ton of celebrities who, at some point, got tired of staring at the wall and instead decided to mic up, find the part of their house that looks the least opulent, and croak out some of your favorite karaoke tunes (mostly, sans fards) in real-time. It raised more than $127 million to fight coronavirus, and yes, Ellen DeGeneres found a way to piss people off… during a charity show. It’s a gift!

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The Rolling Stones Have Postponed Their North American Tour So Mick Jagger Can Get Medical Treatment

March 30, 2019 / Posted by:

Normally-very-spry elderly person Mick Jagger, 75, is sick so his band The Rolling Stones have had to postpone their upcoming North American tour, according to Rolling Stone. The Stones reportedly have a combined age of 294. No one is saying give it up but maybe preserve those so far unbroken hips by simplifying things a little with some acoustic guitars and perhaps some stools to sit upon.

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