The return of The Hills is on its way and Stephanie Spratt is working hard to make it seem like the revival is more interesting than watching beige paint dry by telling us about her totally not scripted storyline involving her brother Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag. Stephanie went on her podcast The Pratt Cast and stated that “no one knows the real Heidi” and that “before the new Hills, the Beginnings, my mom , my brother and I all sat down and said, “we will not let this ruin our family again.” Well, Spencer’s got crystals to buy and Stephanie’s fillers bill ain’t going to pay itself, so commence the broken family storyline!
Because a check is a check and Mischa Barton really needs a check, she’s doing what anyone in her position would do: “reality” TV. Heidi and Spencer Pratt and the rest of the people on The Hills whose names you can never remember showed up to the MTV VMAs this year and promised a reboot was in the works. Brody Jenner and Whitney Port somehow signed up for this, but news dropped today that one Marissa Cooper…aka Mischa…will be jumping from fiction to, uh, fiction-that-is-called-real-life and be (presumably) the Lauren Conrad/Kristin Cavallari role.
Last night at the MTV VMAs, the drips and bowls of bland oatmeal from The Hills came back together to announce that MTV is bringing back the series that launched the careers of all the people not in attendance for the reunion.
Every now and then when I see a Lauren Conrad anything at Kohl’s, I get wistful and this strong desire hits me to flip through Teen Vogue and go for after work drinks and bitch with my biddies at Les Deux. Sadly, Teen Vogue no longer cranks out something to flip through, and Les Deux is closed, but thank GAWD Heidi Montag is a media whore and gives us our daily dose of The Hills. This time around it’s to tell us how her love of plastic surgery nearly sent her to the afterlife for good. Continue reading
There’s been talk of a reunion of The Hills, and you’ll never guess which former cast members would jump at the chance for attention, extended relevance, and a paycheck. But others, like Lo Bosworth, aren’t here for it.