If you ever have trouble sleeping at night, you can always try the tried and true method of closing your eyes and counting Jenelle Evans’ children. Just picture them hopping over a fence, carefree and safe from the terrifying circumstances at the home of Jenelle and her (alleged) dog murdering, weapons stockpiling, confederate flag loving husband David Eason. Radar reports that a “North Carolina judge ordered all of the children in Jenelle and David’s home be removed from their custody”. Nugget’s ghost (Nugget was the family pet whom David alledgedly beat and shot to death) can finally rest easy knowing all the kiddos are safe. For the time being. And according to People, Jenelle would also like a break because she’s “SO sick of this drama. Everyone wants a piece of my life … like why tho?”. Oh, c’mon Jenelle. No guess at all?
Last week, we heard that David Eason, the husband of Teen Mom’s Jenelle Evans, earned himself a first class ticket to Hell after he shot her dog Nugget. Nugget nipped and David and Jenelle’s daughter Ensley, so he claimed the dog was violent and he had to put Nugget down. Well, David is now being investigated by multiple agencies.
Jenelle Evans got her tubes tied making it the first time in Teen Mom history a womb has retired. Thank you for your service ,sweet womb, and for going out on a high note (no, that wasn’t a pun about Jenelle’s meth ways, or was it?) and not allowing Jenelle’s gun toting, homophobic husband to create anymore children with you!
Us Weekly reports that Bristol Palin announced on Instagram that she has quit the show she never belonged on in the first place. Pour out some Highmark Nickel Back Apple Jack… …down your throat–and get ready to drive some snowmobiles and fight with each other! It’s gonna be a true Alaskan goodbye!
Alaskan spawning salmon Bristol Palin is joining the cast of MTV’s Teen Mom OG for their upcoming eighth season. Despite Bristol not being a teen (she’s 27) or an original member of the 16 and Pregnant/Teen Mom cast, she’ll be front and center on MTV’s long-running reality show about the lives and loves of surly young women, their dumb and/or beleaguered sperm donors, and their unfortunate children. And she’s being paid $250K for the privilege! That’s a lot of bail money to cover the aftermath of the Palin family’s next drunk-ass snowmobile hoedown. Continue reading
MTV knows that the best way to get over losing one extremely messy attention-loving former teen mom is to replace her with an equally-messy attention-loving former teen mom. And lucky for them that Bristol Palin answered her phone when they called! No, really – she’s probably spent the past month screening her calls so she doesn’t have to listen to her mom whine about getting tricked by Borat.