Category: Susan Sarandon’s Daughter
Eva Amurri And Her Estranged Husband Welcomed Their Third Child
Eva Amurri, Susan Sarandon’s daughter and nepotism actress turned mommy influencer, announced in November that she and her husband of 8 years, Kyle Martino, have split up, and she made that announcement as her and Kyle’s third baby grew in her body. Being the professional over-sharer that she is, Eva let us know earlier this month that her baby, a son, was coming any day now, and when he finally knocks knocks knocks on her coochie to let her know he wants out, her estranged husband will not be allowed in the birthin’ room. Well, Eva gave birth last week. I know, I’m surprised that baby didn’t stay quarantined up in his mom’s womb over coronavirus, and also want to wait to come out until after the election is over since his newborn ears are too delicate to deal with Grandma Susan rage-screaming over Bernie Sanders losing primaries. Baby is brave.
Kate Winslet Worshipped At The Altar Of Susan Sarandon’s Tits Last Night
I find myself staring at Susan Sarandon’s tits in that picture too and mainly because every time I look up, I see Michael Shannon throwing a creepy grin like, “Don’t tell your mother,” and it makes me want to scream for an adult.
Go ahead and file “Touching Susan Sarandon’s 69-Year-Old Chichis In Front Of A Camera At The SAG Awards” under shit that Kate Winslet doesn’t think is vulgar. I bet that this morning, the muscles in Kate Winslet’s neck are sorer than Kanye’s asshole after spending a few hours alone with a finger vibrator, because she strained every single one of them while resisting the urge to get into those titties and motorboat until her face got chapped.
Susan wanted to bring no sags to the SAGS so she put her chichis into a freakum granny bra from Frederick’s and walked the red carpet with her daughter who also brought the titty game. Forget wasting your money on that breast enlargement cream, Susan proves that what really makes your tits plump and luscious for a long time is some ping-pong boytoy jizz.
