Category: Smash
Open Post: Hosted By The Elephant Who Smashed His Head Into A Thai Woman’s Kitchen To Find Snacks
Last weekend, a Thai woman named Ratchadawan Puengprasoppon (รัชฎาวรรณ ผึ้งประสพพร) was woken up in the wee hours of the morning to crashing and banging sounds. She bravely went downstairs to investigate and was shocked to find an elephant had smashed into her kitchen. “Oh, did I wake you?” The elephant, Boonchuay, lives in Kaeng Krachan national park. Apparently, he decided to take a midnight stroll through Ratchadawan’s nearby village of Chalermkiatpattana in the Hua Hin district, got hungry, and, rather than attempting to stick his head through a door or window to steal food, he opted to Kool-Aid Man himself into poor Ratchadawan’s kitchen. This is a lesson for us all: never leave your dirty dishes out overnight if you’re in elephant country!
The City Of West Hollywood Voted In Favor Of The Permanent Removal Of Donald Trump’s Star On The Walk Of Fame
In what might turn out to be a wholly symbolic act, the city of West Hollywood issued a resounding “Fuck You, Mr. President” and passed a resolution to remove Donald Trump’s star from the Hollywood Walk of Fame. In a unanimous decision, the West Hollywood City Council voted to ask the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce to allow the star to remain a pulverized pile of dust, instead of being spit-shined and reinstalled on the Walk of Fame.
Somebody Took A Pick Axe To Donald Trump’s Star On The Hollywood Walk Of Fame
Somebody has had it, and that somebody is all of us. Well, most of us. Every couple of weeks or so, Donald Trump says or does something egregiously awful or we learn about something he already did or said that was egregiously awful, or he’s caught in an egregiously awful lie, and we all hold our breath for a moment, hoping upon hope, that this is what finally does him in and then… nothing. Red, White and Blue balls for everyone! So when CNN got hold of one of the Michael Cohen pre-election, secret recordings of The Donald discussing a cash pay-off to kill a story about an alleged affair he had with Playboy Playmate Karen McDougal, people braced for impact.
Unfortunately, instead of hearing the exuberant strains of 20 Mariachi bands, the USC marching band and The Vienna Boys Choir all exalting together, we got one, dented sad trombone fart. Nothing (has) happened (yet). Well one of us had had enough with the bullshit and took it upon himself to brave the 3:00 AM Hollywood Blvd creep parade and take a pick axe to Donald Trump’s star on the Walk of Fame.