Sienna Miller And Brad Pitt Supposedly Flirted With Each Other Last Week

It took long enough, but someone finally matched up the former Homewrecker Queen of Hollywood Sienna Miller and noted cheating tramp slut Brad Pitt. Brad Pitt is an executive producer on The Lost City of Z and Sienna Miller’s in that shit. The movie had its Hollywood premiere last week, and Page Six says that at a dinner afterward, Sienna and Brad were “seriously flirting.” If Sienna was “seriously flirting” with Brad while he was dressed like this, she was either drunker than me after doing my taxes or she really gets the down-low tingles for pepaw clothes.

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Panty Creamer Of The Day: Charlie Hunnam In A Suit

After a day of posts about Lyme disease fakers, Suge Knight shit, Shia LaBeouf going nuts again and the death of Don Rickles, what we all need is a dose Charlie Hunnam in a suit. I won’t even ruin this moment by copy and pasting a new quote he dribbled out about ignoring his girlfriend for months for the sake of his art. Not today.

Charlie, seen above working a Parasite Hilton wonk eye, put on his best movie star drag for last night’s Hollywood premiere of The Lost City of Z. Charlie has a true Hollywood glow about him and I’m talking about that damn thick bronzer. Charlie’s makeup artist must’ve set the bronzer gun to “Real Housewife At A Reunion Show” and went wild. Trick looks like he’s been making out and rubbing his face against Mr. Jay from America’s Next Top Model, and yes I want pictures.

Charlie is also the opposite of Stephanie “Excuse My Beauty” Yellowhair, because while she likes tans on her legs, not face, he likes tans on his face, not the rest of his body. Charlie is new-ish to this movie star thing, so I’ll forgive him for not matching his hands to his face.

And here’s more pictures from last night’s premiere including Robert Pattinson (working hair that I’m guessing was cut by a hyperactive toddler with safety scissors), Sienna Miller (who wore a dress made of crib skirts) and a skinny Brad Pitt who was dressed like a grandpa going to an off track betting place.

Pics: Wenn.com

“Now Iz Ze Time On Schprockets Ven Ve Dance!”

In case you didn’t know that Robert Pattinson and FKA Twigs are still together, he made it perfectly clear that they are by wearing outfits that she obviously laid out on the bed for him.

RPattz is at the Berlin International Film Festival, pimping out his movie The Lost City of Z, and at a photo call yesterday, he dressed like an insomniac hacker in a Dystopian thriller. And at the premiere of his movie today, he showed us that you can take the trick out of the vampire movies, but you can’t take the vampire look out of the trick. It looks like Edward Cullen moved to Berlin where by day, he sleeps in a coffin in the back room of the art gallery owned by an older woman, who is also his new lovah. And by night, he plays the keyboards in a Soft Cell tribute band and sells drugs at goth clubs. I don’t know whether I want him to glamour me or sell me Ecstasy in the last stall in the bathroom.

And if I was anywhere near RPattz, I would’ve said, “Now Iz Ze Time On Schprockets Ven Ve Dance!”, because I’d want to see him serve up these hot malfunctioning robot moves:

Nearly every dude in high school who was really into The Cure wore RPattz’s look to the prom. FKA Twigs needs to keep laying his clothes out for him, because this is the look, all the way. And here’s more of RPattz giving you vampire Zoolander as well as pictures of Panty Creamer Hall of Famer, Charlie Hunnam, in a suit and Sienna Miller in Dior boxer briefs.

Pics: Wenn.com

Ben Affleck Is Reportedly Ready To Hang Up His Batfleck Cape

Ben Affleck’s standalone Batman movie hasn’t even started shooting yet and it’s already turning into a bigger wreck than Batman & Robin (although, it’s one of my favorite thanks to Vivica A. Fox’s important cameo appearance as Ms. B. Haven). When The Batman was first announced, Warner Bros. said that Ben would be writing, directing and starring in it. But then Ben dropped out as director and Matt Reeves was brought in as his replacement. Now there’s a rumor that Ben doesn’t even want to star in it anymore and is done with playing Batman. “You’re late to the party, bitch, we were done with you playing Batman the day it was announced,” screamed millions of tricks to Ben.

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A Thing You Needed To Know: Casey Affleck Used To Touch Himself To Vicki The Robot

No, that is not a screen shot of Ben Affleck making the face that his brother Casey Affleck made while jacking it to Vicki the Robot from Small Wonder. I don’t hate you that much.

Ben Affleck was on Jimmy Kimmel Live! last night to whore out his Prohibition turd, Live By Night, and during the interview he pretended to be highly offended over his brother Casey Affleck not thanking him at the Golden Globes on Sunday night. Ben got revenge on Casey for not giving thanks to the trick who made it all possible by burping up embarrassing facts about his brother. One of those embarrassing facts about Casey included him fapping while watching Small Wonder. I blame Casey Affleck for the reason why Jamie Lawson went on to live under a bridge.

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Balthazar Getty Says Cheating With Sienna Miller Made His Marriage Stronger

Now let’s go all the way back to 2008 when Sienna Miller was inducted into the Famous Homewreckers Hall of Fame after getting with actor and Getty heir Balthazar Getty. Back then a single Sienna hooked up with Balthazar who was very married at the time to the mother of his four kids Rosetta Getty. Eventually Sienna and Balthazar called their affair off, and he went crawling back to Rosetta.

Some would think that leaving his wife and four kids – FOUR KIDS – so that he could bang Factory Girl on a series of expensive boats would be enough for Rosetta to leave her dead marriage in the morgue, but the opposite happened. She took him back two years later.

Balthazar – who is now a DJ, apparently – recently spoke to the Evening Standard (via Daily Mail) about The Sienna Years. Balthazar considers what happened with Sienna seven years ago to be “ancient history” and he doesn’t like to talk about it anymore. What he would like to talk about is how Sienna’s cooch should seriously consider getting certified as a couples counselor, because his marriage to Rosetta is “stronger” than before. Balthazar also released this nugget of cheater enlightenment:

“Without going down, you can’t rise again.”

Poor Sienna. “Going down?” What did she do to deserve such barely-subtle shade? Oh, right. But like Balthazar is one to talk: rising and going down on someone other than Rosetta was what got him in trouble in the first place.

Here’s Balthazar looking like a barber from The Matrix with his wife at a charity event last month.

Pics: Splash, Wenn.com