Despite all the Bible studies, goody two-shoes brunches, and “we’re just fraaaands” hangout sessions, Justin Bieber has apparently still not made it official with ex-boo thang Selena Gomez, but her hearts knows what it wants (sorry, too easy)…and that could mean hopping back aboard the Bieber peen…I mean…dating Justin again! Continue reading
There’s nothing that brings all the tweens to the yard than some passive aggressive social media maneuver. Back in my day, all we had were obscure Hanson lyrics to post as an AIM away message, but kids these days can do all sorts of stunts like blocking, unfollowing, and…GOING PRIVATE! So when Selena Gomez took her Instagram to private mode for a mere 130 million of her closest fans and followers, the same number of Detective LaToyas popped up looking for answers. Continue reading
Selena Gomez was recently named Billboard’s Woman of The Year. Along with that auspicious title comes a fun photoshoot and a long sit-down interview. In the interview Selena discussed, among other things, puppies (she got one while she was with The Weeknd, his name is Charlie!), horses (she did equine therapy), her new kidney and teddy bears (unverified, but probably a gift from Justin Bieber because he’s exactly the kind of dude who thinks an oversized teddy bear is an appropriate gift for an adult woman. Spoiler Alert: The teddy bear gets mauled by Charlie in the end). The interviewer was so taken with Selena’s thoughtfulness and maturity that she was moved to write:
There is no fidgeting, no hesitation, no searching gazes as she speaks — only a kind of openness that makes it easy to forget Gomez is only halfway through her 20s.
Well, to a point. There was one question that came up that seemed to derail Selena’s tranquility and calm demeanor: Why would you fuck with Woody Allen?
One month ago, Selena Gomez and The Weeknd called it quits after she was rumored to have gone crawling back to her first Canadian boyfriend, Justin Bieber. This situation has gotten just a bit more interesting for those who get off on petty drama (raises hand). The Weeknd has allegedly wiped all traces of Selena from his Instagram page. But according to Selena Gomez, she and The Weeknd are still jacket-sharing friends.
While Pink seemed to sing live while busting out some Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark shit on the side of a building like a crazy person, Selena Gomez seemed to have given her vocal cords the night off and chose to Britney it instead (although TMZ denies it, claiming she only used a backing track). But in Selena’s defense, she got a kidney transplant this past summer, and if I had a kidney transplant this past summer, I’d still be in bed and making my friends and family wait on me. “Michael, it’s been fifteen years since you’ve gotten that kidney. Don’t you think you should get out of bed already and stop making me get your favorite comfort meal of Popeye’s chicken with KFC sides?”
Selena and that handless coffee mug (that ain’t a marshmallow, stop it) performed their song Wolves at the American Music Awards last night, and well, it was something that happened. Selena, who is now a greasy shade of Bieber blond, moved her mouth on a mic while looking about as out of it as a still drunk me when I get up in the middle of the night to piss. As a bruised and busted up Selena stumbled around her wrecked car, a chorus of sister wives in Keds let the devil take over their bodies while they busted out moves choreographed by Regan from The Exorcist. I think the shrug at the end pretty much sums the whole thing up.
Selena looked dazed and confused, and that might have been part of her performance since she’s supposed to be a car crash victim and shit. Or maybe, right before her performance, she was suddenly hit with the realization that she’s boning Justin Bieber again and is a member of a “church” whose leader looks like a Terry Richardson fanboy.
Pics: ABC, Wenn.com
First Again comes love, then comes a PR-staged marriage, then comes Selena pushing Bieber in a baby carriage. Okay, that’s not how it goes but it seems like Selena Gomez is taking a post-The Weeknd rebound ride aboard some Canadian bacon. Continue reading