Sean Spicer will not be appearing on Dancing With The Stars as was previously speculated. If you were hoping to see Spicy decked out in tight sequined pants taking his podium for a spin on the dance floor, cheek to mic in a passionate and fiery paso doble, sorry, that dream is canceled.
As you may know by now, Sean Spicer is the Gerber baby in comparison to new White House Communications Director Anthony Scaramucci. While The Mooch even had my B-hole quivering at his Jersey Boy charm on Day 1 at the podium, he’s since made us all, including his wife, take a hard look in the mirror. Because we’re suddenly left defending people we never thought we would have to!
We all knew that just because Sean Spicer quit those bitches at The White House, he wasn’t going to go gentle into that good night. Spicey is ready to cash in his chips and get that paper now that he’s been unchained from his podium in the fortress of solitude, or wherever he’s been hiding out these past few months. Sean hasn’t been wasting time either.
You’d have thought that turning in his resignation and getting the fuck out of dodge would bring Sean Spicer some much needed peace and a break from the blaring media scrutiny. Sadly, it seems that his petty behavior is following him out the door.
The carousel of destruction that is our American political system under the Trump regime seems to spin faster and faster with each passing day.
This week, Donald Trump fired his FBI director who, coincidentally, was currently heading up an investigation into his ties to Mother Russia. In an effort to assure us that we’re not crazy and everything is definitely in a state of WTF, Melissa McCarthy and Alec Baldwin reprised their press secretary Sean Spicer and president Donald Trump impressions on Saturday Night Live last night. At least we’ll have something to laugh about as everything crumbles around us, right?
Melissa McCarthy is hosting Saturday Night Live for the fifth time tomorrow night, and it looks like she’s bringing her too-perfect impression of White House hide-and-seek enthusiast Sean Spicer. Melissa as Spicey was seen rolling down 59th Street in NYC earlier today on a motorized press podium. I can’t believe nobody tried to hop on the back of that thing and ask how much it would cost to go to LaGuardia.
— Sherrilyn Ifill (@Sifill_LDF) May 12, 2017
That’s a surprising amount of road rage coming from Spicey (I expected much more, to be honest). He definitely seems like the type who would steer with his knees just so he could keep one hand free to flip off drivers and the other hand for shoving gum in his mouth.
NBC News doesn’t know what Melissa was doing out there on the street, but they made the obvious assumption it’s probably for a sketch. I wonder if when they were done, Melissa decided to have a couple laughs by staying in costume as Sean Spicer and taking the shoutmobile down to Trump Tower to freak out Melania Trump. No, that would almost be too mean. Melania would lose it if she saw a member of the White House staff cruising up to her penthouse. “Oh nooooo, don’t tell me they’re moving the White House to New York. Shit shit shit. Maybe if I lock the door and duck behind the couch, they won’t think I’m home.”