Category: Sam Smith
Sam Smith Received A 6-Foot Tall, 2-Ton Marble Penis Statue As A Gift From Ed Sheeran
If you’re friends with Ed Sheeran, it seems like an unsolicited dick statue may be the new unsolicited dick pic. I’m just going to pretend that Ed’s chums got sick of opening his texts only to find his fiery bush and limp fuck parts, so it was time for him to start thinking outside of the box, which led to this brilliant idea: Ed is known among his friends and acquaintances for having big, hard dicks delivered right to their doorsteps, with Sam Smith being the proud new owner of one of the biggest schlong statues yet.
Much Like The Socially Distanced Celebrities, The Fashions Of The MTV EMAs Were All Over The Place
The MTV European Music Awards were yesterday and the show was a virtual socially-distanced affair like most award shows these days. It was not held in one single city and instead film from locations all over the world. Even though award shows look different now the celebrities have quickly acclimatized and have started perfecting the green-screen red carpet. As such the celebs stunted from their mansions and garages and private islands (I’m just assuming) to serve award-show chic!
Sam Smith Did A Beauty Video For Vogue And Revealed They Got A Hair Transplant
Sam Smith has been very open about their body image issues. At the tender age of twelve, they got liposuction to remove extra fat from their mammaries (boob area). I mean, that particular preteen trauma takes the cake, but I think we can all relate to hating our bodies at that age.
Now the singer is following in the footsteps of Cheyenne Jackson and confessing they got hair transplant surgery. Sam dropped this tidbit in a recent video for Vogue that details their personal beauty routine. If you’re interested, it’s a mere sixteen minutes long and not once do you have to use your brain! Continue reading
Sam Smith Got Kicked Off A Dating App For Looking Too Much Like Sam Smith
Since I have a great respect for both my time and my ears, I don’t listen to Sam Smith. But it’s mostly because the only thing I think of when I see their face is the time they won an Oscar for singing some James Bond theme song, hopped up onto the stage, and proclaimed to be the first gay person to win the award (despite that being so unbelievably not true). So, needless to say, when Sam Smith makes a proclamation that doesn’t come with a CVS-length roll of receipts, I tend to be a little skeptical. But anyway…Sam says that they recently got kicked off of a dating app––and not for allegedly fat-shaming his matches or making sweeping statements about how much Michael Jackson sucks. This reason was much more believable.
Richard Madden Isn’t Saying Whether He And Brandon Flynn Are A Couple Or Not
Richard Madden was recently seen quasi-embracing openly queer actor Brandon Flynn while they were buying doobies together. So they’re obviously fucking. Or not. Richard Madden ain’t saying.
Richard Madden And Brandon Flynn Had Their Arms Around Each Other (GASP!) After Buying “Marijuana Cigarettes” (DOUBLE GASP!)
Thousands of gays, and people who get into Scottish daddy on Yankee twink action, were hospitalized yesterday with severe dehydration after they slobbered gallons of bodily fluids from all their holes after seeing pictures of Panty Creamer Richard Madden (of Bodyguard, Rocketman and Game of Thrones) and Brandon Flynn (of 13 Reasons Why) getting all cozy in Los Angeles over the weekend. Richard and Brandon were papped with their arms around each other after buying “marijuana cigarettes” (REEFER MADNESS!). So of course, many now think that Richard Madden is bi and that he and Brandon are totally doing it, and after they bought those “marijuana cigarettes” (yes, the year is 1966) they went home, got naked, and Richard blew “marijuana cigarette” smoke into Brandon’s b-hole before doing him. Get me a wet vac and a stretcher, because I just slobbered out a lake from that image and I now need medical attention.