We’ve been shitting up post after post from last night’s Adele Appreciation Ceremony (Featuring Adele Appreciating Beyonce), but another awards show happened yesterday. Two weeks before Hollywood gets dressed up in $15,000 gowns to lick each other’s taints and jack one another off at the Oscars, they got into $15,000 gowns to lick each other’s taints and jack one another off at the BAFTAs last night.
100% manly masc man Russell Tovey, who was in Looking and Being Human, is currently on Broadway in A View From The Bridge. There’s a point in the play when the audience gets several eyefuls of Russell Tovey’s nipples and cum gutters after he takes his shirt off. Well, the theater should start selling smelling salts at the bar because Russell’s body is giving people the major vapors.
Playbill says that there’s some seating onstage and during the nighttime performance on January 29th, a man in those seats collapsed about three quarters into the show. The audience members around the man thought he was having a heart attack so they screamed for a doctor. Three doctors were in the audience (because doctors are the only ones who can afford that shit!) and they treated the man as best as they could before the paramedics showed up. The man was taken to the hospital and the play picked back up. A spokesperson for the show said that the man has a heart condition but he didn’t have a heart attack. He fainted and is fine now. Page Six says that Russell Tovey should name his nipples Holly and Holm because they knock tricks out. They claim that Russell’s shirtless butch manliness was too much for the audience member to take!
…a male audience member, in the onstage seating section at the Lyceum Theatre, fainted at the sight of actor Russell Tovey as he took off his shirt.
The patron passed out in the middle of a scene with Tovey and co-stars Phoebe Fox and Mark Strong.
Early Sunday, Tovey received a tweet from the faint-hearted audience member apologizing if he “disturbed the performance.”
Tovey’s washboard abs can be seen onstage eight times a week. Just remember to breathe deeply.
Russell Tovey’s publicist really deserves a huge bonus for leaking that oh-so-real tidbit to Page Six. And I don’t know why I’m writing words, because I doubt you’re reading them since you’re passed out on the floor after the sight of Russell Tovey’s hotness knocked you out. I know how you feel. I have that picture open on my desktop as I put this post together and I’ve passed out five times while writi
If you’re looking at the name “Russell Tovey” and are thinking to yourself, “Harpo, who dis woman,” I have two things to tell you. 1. You need to say, “Harpo, who dis manly masculine man,” instead, because Russell ain’t no fem. 2. Russell is an openly gay British actor with perfect blowjob handle ears who is currently on HBO’s Looking and was a wolf in the UK show Being Human for 4 seasons.
One of my first memories of a grown up throwing a curse word in front of me was when I was around 4 or 5. I was playing in the front yard and my dad was doing something in the garage. His friend, who lived across the street from us, walked up the driveway and said to me, “You’re such a fruit.” I thanked him, because I thought he was giving me a compliment. But my dad stopped what he was doing and shouted at the dude, “Say that again and I’ll fuck you up.” Well, if anybody called Russell Tovey a fruit in front of his dad, his dad probably wouldn’t threaten to beat a trick for it. He’d be too busy dragging his son to gay conversion therapy.
Russell did an interview with The Guardian to promote his new BBC show Banished and the big quote making the rounds is the one where he pretty much says he’s glad that he can answer all the Grindr profiles with the words, “MASC4MASC ONLY NO FEMZ” in them. Russell wanted to go to a theater school when he was a kid, but his dad wouldn’t let him. Russell’s glad his dad spit and shat on that idea, because if he went, he might’ve turned into a glitter-farting, sissy big girl queen instead of the big butch Brawny Man he is today.