Category: Rolling Stones
Keith Richards Quit Smoking After 55 Years
In a shocking turn of events, Keith Richards is no longer a smoker. 78-year-old Keith revealed the news in a recent interview with CBS Sunday Morning. Keith says that he quietly quit two years ago, after 55 straight years of ciggie-suckin’. A reminder that, back in 2018, he announced he’d essentially given up drinking (save for the occasional glass of wine or pint of beer). He also quit cocaine in 2006 and heroin in 1978. Which means Keith Richards is… straight edge?! Great, yet another sign of the Apocalypse.
Charlie Watts Of The Rolling Stones Has Died At 80
It was announced earlier this month that Charlie Watts, founding member of The Rolling Stones and the band’s only drummer, would not be a part of the Stones’ upcoming tour because he needed time to recover from an unspecified medical procedure. Charlie was treated for throat cancer in 2004. And today, the band brought news that’s sadness wrapped in more sadness by announcing that Charlie Watts died today in London. He was 80.
I Didn’t Know Gollum Was A Rolling Stones Fan
The Rolling Stones performed a secret show at the 650-capacity Echoplex in the Echo Park neighborhood of L.A. last night and it brought out Johnny Depp, Amber Heard, Bruce Willis, James Woods, Gwen Stefani, Ke$hit and the Olsen Trolls. Everybody is talking about how Amber and Johnny held hands at the show, but that’s what hos do when they’re doing each other full-time. They hold hands in public places. Well, unless you’re doing me full-time and then you only agree to meet me at night, in a Denny’s far from your apartment where nobody knows you and the waitress won’t give a shit that you’re sharing french fries and chocolate pie with me. But yeah, Amber and Johnny eat each other’s butts all the time, so it’s not surprising that they’re holding hands.
But what everybody should be talking about is how the Olsen Trolls showed up looking like twin be-weaved Gollums on heroin. When you make Ke$hit look like a crystal clear dew drop sitting on top of the petal of a freshly bloomed wild flower on the peak of a mountain top that has never been visited by man, maybe it’s time to take a shower or at least let a bitch hose you down on the driveway.
