Both Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are serious actors now, and in an alternate universe they could probably pay someone to wipe the memory of the Twilight films from everyone’s brains. But here in this universe we will always remember that garbage, so their only option is to acknowledge and embrace how corny it was.
After a day of posts about Lyme disease fakers, Suge Knight shit, Shia LaBeouf going nuts again and the death of Don Rickles, what we all need is a dose Charlie Hunnam in a suit. I won’t even ruin this moment by copy and pasting a new quote he dribbled out about ignoring his girlfriend for months for the sake of his art. Not today.
Charlie, seen above working a Parasite Hilton wonk eye, put on his best movie star drag for last night’s Hollywood premiere of The Lost City of Z. Charlie has a true Hollywood glow about him and I’m talking about that damn thick bronzer. Charlie’s makeup artist must’ve set the bronzer gun to “Real Housewife At A Reunion Show” and went wild. Trick looks like he’s been making out and rubbing his face against Mr. Jay from America’s Next Top Model, and yes I want pictures.
Charlie is also the opposite of Stephanie “Excuse My Beauty” Yellowhair, because while she likes tans on her legs, not face, he likes tans on his face, not the rest of his body. Charlie is new-ish to this movie star thing, so I’ll forgive him for not matching his hands to his face.
And here’s more pictures from last night’s premiere including Robert Pattinson (working hair that I’m guessing was cut by a hyperactive toddler with safety scissors), Sienna Miller (who wore a dress made of crib skirts) and a skinny Brad Pitt who was dressed like a grandpa going to an off track betting place.
Charlie Hunnam admitted a few months ago that while he was filming The Lost City of Z in Colombia, he went method by ignoring his girlfriend Morgana McNelis. At the same time Charlie was pulling his method acting antics on Morgana, his co-star Robert Pattinson might have been running the same game on him.
During an interview with Screen Daily, Charlie admitted that before they started filming The Lost City of Z, he had a few rehearsals with Sienna Miller, but none with Robert because he wanted their relationship to evolve naturally on screen. Charlie says that he doesn’t think he said more than ten words to Robert off-camera.
“I didn’t know if he was just ‘in that zone’ or if he genuinely didn’t like me. There was a real distance between us. But it creates the right dynamic on screen.”
But don’t worry, they’re sort-of friends now.
“He’s reached out to me subsequently, making overtures for us to be friends now, so I think it was about the work.”
Since asking someone if they’re method acting seems to be just too difficult, maybe actors should be required to have some kind of signal to let everyone else on set know that they’re decided to go method. Just so that no one is awkwardly standing around, scratching their heads and wondering what they did to piss so-and-so off. They could wear little vests like service dogs that say: “PLEASE DON’T BE OFFENDED – I’m not being a dick, I’m just method acting.”
Here’s Charlie looking like he’s auditioning for the role of ‘Cocky College RA from 2003′ at CinemaCon in Las Vegas yesterday.
In case you didn’t know that Robert Pattinson and FKA Twigs are still together, he made it perfectly clear that they are by wearing outfits that she obviously laid out on the bed for him.
RPattz is at the Berlin International Film Festival, pimping out his movie The Lost City of Z, and at a photo call yesterday, he dressed like an insomniac hacker in a Dystopian thriller. And at the premiere of his movie today, he showed us that you can take the trick out of the vampire movies, but you can’t take the vampire look out of the trick. It looks like Edward Cullen moved to Berlin where by day, he sleeps in a coffin in the back room of the art gallery owned by an older woman, who is also his new lovah. And by night, he plays the keyboards in a Soft Cell tribute band and sells drugs at goth clubs. I don’t know whether I want him to glamour me or sell me Ecstasy in the last stall in the bathroom.
And if I was anywhere near RPattz, I would’ve said, “Now Iz Ze Time On Schprockets Ven Ve Dance!”, because I’d want to see him serve up these hot malfunctioning robot moves:
Nearly every dude in high school who was really into The Cure wore RPattz’s look to the prom. FKA Twigs needs to keep laying his clothes out for him, because this is the look, all the way. And here’s more of RPattz giving you vampire Zoolander as well as pictures of Panty Creamer Hall of Famer, Charlie Hunnam, in a suit and Sienna Miller in Dior boxer briefs.
Ben Affleck’s standalone Batman movie hasn’t even started shooting yet and it’s already turning into a bigger wreck than Batman & Robin (although, it’s one of my favorite thanks to Vivica A. Fox’s important cameo appearance as Ms. B. Haven). When The Batman was first announced, Warner Bros. said that Ben would be writing, directing and starring in it. But then Ben dropped out as director and Matt Reeves was brought in as his replacement. Now there’s a rumor that Ben doesn’t even want to star in it anymore and is done with playing Batman. “You’re late to the party, bitch, we were done with you playing Batman the day it was announced,” screamed millions of tricks to Ben.
Let’s turn the clock back to 2012. Hurricane Sandy was slapping the shit out of NYC. Jessica Simpson struggled to deal with Papa Joe’s twink addiction. And our current president Donald Trump felt necessary to chime in about a celebrity couple’s tragic breakup. He’s grown so much since then.
Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson starred as a starcrossed and sparkly vampire couple in a seemingly endless film franchise called Twilight in the early 2010s. They were also in a poorly concealed “secret” relationship which kaboomed when Kristen was papped letting a director attend to her needs in a mini-Cooper. Our future president, who was merely a reality television star back then, was firmly on Team Edward. He hates cheating (he’s been romancing the Twitter bird for a looonnngg time)!