It’s not often that the universe conspires to do us a favor but it must feel really sorry for us right now because it’s thrown us a tasty bone. I nearly plotzed (oh who am I kidding, I plotzed like a bitch) when I read in Entertainment Weekly that one of my favorite shows of all time, America’s Next Top Model was going to have a crossover episode with my absolute favorite show of all time RuPaul’s Drag Race in it’s upcoming Cycle 24. As we already know, Tyra Banks is back, and joining her will be Noted Fashion Photographer Nigel Barker, Ashley Graham, and Drew Elliott. Also, since both ANTM and Drag Race are on Vh1 now, there will be a crossover episode starring Katya, Valentina and Manila Luzon.
For all five of us who make time each week to drool in front of the couch and watch Vanderpump Rules, it should come as no shock that Stassi Schroeder is up to some shit stirring. But unlike when she does it with the bus boys and cocktail waitresses at Sur, this time advertisers are having the last laugh. Continue reading
Satisfying, uncomplicated, wholesome and fun. These are words we don’t get to throw around a lot in #thesetroubledtimes. But thanks to one of the best game shows of all time, there may be hope for us still. Supermarket Sweep is coming back! Why is this show so fucking great? I don’t know it just is! Why am I so exited? I don’t know I just am!
Oh 2016. You are the twenty-year old re-gifted fruitcake that nobody wants during the festive season. It was bad enough when you permanently kidnapped my first blue-eyed bae while I was getting hammered on knock-off Jameson during Christmas, but before then you have made it your mission to treat racism like a relative living in the basement that only comes up for the Christmas ham and spiked eggnog. Translation: it’s always in the background waiting to make an appearance once again.
When we last left the totally real reality show starring the most reluctant Kardashian fame whore Rob Kardashian and his knocked-up enthusiastic fame whore fiancé Blac Chyna, they were having “problems” during filming. Rob had erased all pictures, including ones of Chyna, from his Instagram. He also unfollowed her for a second. Rob’s decision to dramatically remove the humanoid vinyl toy from his social media life was apparently caused by a fight they had during the filming of Rob & Chyna. At the time, it was rumored that their fight was over some suspicious texts Rob found on Chyna’s phone and that they were breaking up. Now TMZ is saying that things have been rough between Rob and Chyna, but it might have more to do with the 20-person kamera krew following them around everywhere.
Shortly after Blac Chyna announced that she was knocked up with Rob Kardashian’s baby, there were whispers that the two of them were trying to get a reality show. Well, E! has announced what we all pretty much figured was only a matter of time before it was announced: that Rob and Chyna are getting their own reality show. Rob & Chyna (current working title) will be a six-episode docuseries that will follow Rob and Chyna’s engagement, her pregnancy, and “everything in between.” Finally, an answer to the question: “Is there is a reality show more pointless than Keeping Up With The Kardashians?”
Each episode will be an hour long (good fucking lord WHY), and will be followed by a separate special featuring the birth of their baby. I don’t know what the working title of that one will be, but I’m sure “Rob & Chyna: Who Cares, Just Give Us The Money” has been thrown around a couple times in the writer’s room. Rob & Chyna will air sometime later this year. E! released this comedy gem about the show:
“Very few love stories have created as much pop culture buzz as Rob and Chyna’s, and we are thrilled to see Rob in such a happy place. We are excited to share the next chapter in their relationship.”
I know your first instinct will be to congratulate the woman who probably orchestrated this shamelessness. But please do not disturb Kris Jenner at this time. She’ll be spending the next 24 hours twirling around Khasa Kardashian to Kelly Clarkson’s “A Moment Like This” in celebration of the fact that what was once her least-pimpable child has done the unthinkable and landed himself a six-episode reality show AND a special. If you need Blac Chyna, she’ll be doing the same. But her song choice will be “Finally” by CeCe Peniston and she’ll be singing it to her shiny new reality show contract. “Finally, it has happened to me, validation and fame, no more Instagram modeling.”
Here’s future E! reality star Blac Chyna and the man who made it all possible, Rob Kardashian, at an event in Las Vegas this weekend.