Category: Playboy
Holly Madison Is Still Talking About How Bad Sex With Hugh Hefner Was
When most of us think of undesirable but required day-to-day burdens, it’s usually things like having to come up with a way to respond to the co-worker who walks in late with an iced coffee every morning and asks, “hey there! Working hard, or hardly working?” without choke-slamming them or having to get back out of bed after retiring for the evening because you just remembered that you didn’t move the laundry from the washer to the dryer. But, from 2001-2008 for former Girls Next Door star/Hugh Hefner girlfriend, Holly Madison, it was having to lower herself onto his stagnant old wrinkled microwaved hot dog while other girls who hated her looked on and commented. Holly and fellow Girl Next Door, Bridget Marquardt, launched a podcast and have been discussing the encumbrance of having sex with the elderly Playboy founder.
Crystal Hefner Says She’s Removed Everything Fake From Her Body And Has Embraced Modesty
When I think of Hugh Hefner’s revolving door of blonde, plastic girlfriends, I mostly just think of Holly Madison and Kendra Wilkinson. But Crystal Hefner (nee Harris) was Hef’s third and final wife; she was with him from 2009 until Hef’s death at age 91 in 2017, and he left her a cool $5 million and a house in his will.
Nearly five years later, and a now ancient Crystal has taken to Instagram to let her 3 million followers know that she’s entered a new phase in her life. The 35-year-old says she’s deleted all the sexy photos on her social media, removed “everything fake” from her body, and is embracing “modesty”. And just like that, Hef rolled over so many times in his grave that next-door neighbor Marilyn Monroe had to bang on their shared crypt wall to get him to shut up: “Bitch, I know I rolled hard when Madonna recreated my death for V Magazine, but keep it down, PUH-LEASE!”
Dolly Parton Recreated Her Playboy Cover For Her Husband Carl Dean’s 79th Birthday
75-year-old Dolly Parton has been married to Carl Thomas Dean since 1966, and for his 79th birthday, she decided to give him a heart attack. JK, but she very well may have as she recreated her 1978 Playboy cover and showed the world that she still got it. And hot dayum, she sure does! If this doesn’t help her husband “get it up to pee” then nothing will! For Carl’s birthday, Dolly decided to surprise him by working the same Playboy Bunny ensemble she wore on her cover in 1978.
Dolly Parton Is In Talks To Pose For Playboy For Her 75th Birthday
Good Golly Miss Dolly Parton! The septuagenarian country legend has revealed that she’s in talks to return to Playboy in honor of her 75th birthday (January 19th, Capricorn). The last time Dolly graced their cover was back in 1978, when she was a mere 32. Dolly mentioned that she’d love to be a Playboy cover girl again back in early March. But only if the magazine would “go for it”. Well, it looks like they’re interested, because in a new radio interview, she revealed that she’s in talks to actually do it.
Open Post: Hosted By Dolly Parton Letting Playboy Know That She’s Ready To Grace Their Cover With Her Beauty Again
Thank your lucky stars, because you’re smack dab in the middle of a Dolly Parton Renaissance. The last few months Dolly’s been out there hustling her new wig line, her 50th anniversary celebration at the Grand Ole Opry, her Netflix series Heartstrings, and her lifestyle brand. She also set the internet aflame with that dumb LinkedIn/Facebook/Instagram/Tinder thing all your aunts did, AKA the Dolly Parton challenge.
Recently, while promoting her new A&E documentary on 60 Minutes: Australia, she shared the happy news that she’ll never retire, and, in fact, would love to pose for Playboy again. Continue reading
Playboy Finally Delivers Some Nipple Hardening And Loin Quivering Hotness
It’s been a good week for the majority shareholders in the companies who make Preparation H and Vagisil, because b-holes have been howling themselves raw and coochie holes have been slobbering themselves bone dry over Extra Miller serving bust-a-nut-inducing looks like his Queen Of The Gothic Trash Bags look, his Electrocuted Swan Lake look, and his Uniqlo assistant manager on E look (above). Get ready to throw an entire warehouse of Prep H and/or Vagisil at your fuck parts, because Extra Ezra has once again struck genitals with his sexiness. This time he had help from Playboy. I know, Playboy actually delivering some fap material? 2018 really is like an acid trip in the Upside Down.