Category: Phil Collins

Phil Collin’s Ex-Wife Orianne Cevey Is Getting A Divorce From Her New Husband Who Was An Escort

April 19, 2022 / Posted by:

If you should see Andy Cohen today, please give him his space. He is surely in deep mourning after learning that Phil Collins’ ex-wife Orianne Cevey is getting a divorce from her husband of just over a year, Thomas Bates, who she secretly married in Las Vegas while she and Phil were still together. Yet Andy missed his opportunity to cast Orianne in the reboot of Real Housewives of Miami last year. According to Page Six, Orianne and Tom’s love “turned sour” after Phil successfully had them removed from his mansion, where they had been squatting ever since Orianne moved him in, following their wedding while Phil was away on tour. So to learn today from court papers pertaining to her divorce, that Orianne ordered Tom through an escort service and he’s now accusing her of threatening to chop his dick off, must be devastating for Andy. You can’t script that kind of drama! It has to fall from the sky like manna from heaven, and Andy’s over here sitting high and dry. Oh well, you snooze, you lose! And nobody snoozes on Orianne unless they want to see their dick in a jar being auctioned off to the highest bidder!

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Lily Collins Got Married To Charlie McDowell Over The Weekend

September 8, 2021 / Posted by:

Prepare for a wedding announcement that will surely sound like the result of playing a quick round of Celebrity Spawn Mad-Libs. Because almost everyone in this story is famous or famous-adjacent. There are even some famous names that will get dropped that have nothing to do with these notable nuptials. But here’s what you need to know right away: Emily in Paris’ Lily Collins, seen above in so much white lace your grandma’s living room windows would be jealous, got married over the weekend, and the man in the brown velvet sharing the “I do” duties is her fiancé of nearly a year, Charlie McDowell.

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Orianne Cevey Is Auctioning Off Some Of Phil Collins’ Gold Records And Awards

January 27, 2021 / Posted by:

If you close your eyes and listen very carefully, you can hear a dull thudding noise coming from the west. That’s Andy Cohen kicking himself for not having signed Orianne Cevey, Phil Collins’ outrageous ex-wife, sooner to star in a planned reboot of Real Housewives of Miami. He waited too long and now Orianne is out here burning through one delicious plot line after another with nary a camera to record all the drama. Page Six reports that Orianne’s latest FU to Phil has her auctioning off some of his gold records and awards for a song because they “no longer spark joy.” Also no longer sparking joy— 5,000 pairs of shoes. Andy must be livid. That’s some Real Housewives of Despotic Kleptocrats shit right there, AKA the franchise that got away.

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Phil Collins’ Ex Orianne Cevey May Appear In The Possible Return Of “Real Housewives Of Miami”

January 13, 2021 / Posted by:

Andy Cohen sure knows how to pick ‘em. According to Page Six, Andy’s trying to revive The Real Housewives of Miami and is eyeing Phil Collinsspectacularly messy ex-wife Orianne Cevey to join the cast. Since he’ll probably have to wait a little while to see how things shake down before he signs his #1 draft pick Melania Trump, Orianne, and the possible return of Larsa Pippen, who has stepped up her mess game admirably, will have to suffice. While no one can ever replace Grand Dame of Miami Housewives eleganza, Elsa Patton aka La Bruja, Orianne’s rapidly evolving visage does make her the heir apparent.

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Phil Collins’ Ex-Wife Says A Spinal Injury Is Preventing Her From Leaving His Miami Mansion

November 16, 2020 / Posted by:

Since the Dragon Breath & Broken Penis Plan wasn’t the Hail Mary her lawyers were counting on, Orianne Cevey has come up with another strategy to keep her in Phil Collins’ multi-million Miami Beach mansion. Phil has been trying to evict his ex-wife Orianne from his Florida mansion for several months now because it’s his house, and he doesn’t want his ex-wife living there (especially not with her new husband, which she allegedly has been doing). Despite a lawsuit telling her to get out, Orianne ain’t going nowhere. And now she’s claiming that she literally can’t pack her bags and leave the property, because of spine issues.

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Phil Collins’ Ex-Wife Claims That He Didn’t Bathe For Months, Never Brushed His Teeth, And Is Impotent 

November 10, 2020 / Posted by:

The fight between Phil Collins and his ex-wife, Orianne Cevey, over his $33 million Miami Beach mansion has gotten messier, and specifically, it’s gotten stankier.  TMZ says that Orianne has filed legal paperwork alleging that Phil Collins is Pig Pen’s English uncle because he didn’t brush his teeth or wash his ass for a year. But Phil has shot back at Orianne, saying she’s an exaggerating liar who’s extorting him for money through scandal.

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