Category: Night Crumbs

Night Crumbs

March 24, 2017 / Posted by:

Tom Hardy’s dog Woody visited him on the set of Peaky Blinders and easily stole the show. And apologies if you’re a dick-obsessed trick like me and read that first sentence as “Tom Hardy’s woody” before looking at the picture. I didn’t mean to give you a case of blue balls on a Friday – Lainey Gossip 

Paging Courtney Stodden! Round up your lawyers because Bella Thorne is stealing your act – Drunken Stepfather

Sienna Miller doesn’t really give a fuck that we all called her the Queen of Home Wrecking – Celebitchy

But can Teen Mom Jenelle even read? – Reality Tea

Thanks to their cartoon lips and cartoon asses, the Kartrashians are already cartoon characters – The Superficial

David D’Amato (aka Jane O’Brien and Terri Tickle), the focus of the interesting-as-hell documentary Tickled, has died – Towleroad

Elizabeth Banks looks like she snatched her outfit out of Lisa Vanderpump’s closet – Popoholic

Artie Lange may or may not have been fired from HBO’s CrashingPajiba

Excuse me while I recreate Kara Del Toro’s outfit and pose for a future Grindr profile pic – Hollywood Tuna 

Iggy Azalea’s new song is the reason why mute exists – IDLYITW

Stephanie Tanner should stop fighting it and go back to her true soulmate, Harry Takayama! – Just Jared

We really don’t need yet another TV thing about the murder of JonBenet Ramsey, but I’m still all about this Netflix docuseries – Boy Culture



Night Crumbs

March 23, 2017 / Posted by:

Tall glass of Swedish leche Alexander Skarsgard and Alexa Chung are still together, but something doesn’t seem right. If you’re fucking ASkars full-time, you don’t walk around with a sour ass look on your face. You do naked cartwheels down the street while singing about how you’re fucking ASkars full-time. That’s a natural reaction! – Lainey Gossip

Even though her dog is panting, Katharine McPhee is the thirstiest one in that pic. And for John Mayer nonetheless! – Drunken Stepfather

Have a teen daughter and want her to hate herself and her body? Get her the new book by soulless workout troll Tracy AndersonCelebitchy

Yes, Christina Milian wore one of Kylie Jenner’s wigs last night, but the most question mark-inducing thing about her look is that chichi chain thing – The Superficial 

Blondie put out yet another new song, and would I drunkenly dance to it at a bar? Probably. Would I be asked to leave that bar because my dancing was scaring the other customers? Definitely. – Towleroad

The Shat is really into Dancing with the Stars, and is also really into hating on The BachelorReality Tea 

If Olivia Wilde’s character is pregnant with a basketball, then they nailed her look – Popoholic

Bella Thorne is still Bella Thorne-ing – Hollywood Tuna 

“Eating an anointed cake” sounds like another way to say that you ate an ass so sweet it made you see God – OMG Blog

I must’ve missed the teaser for the teaser for the trailer for Justice LeaguePajiba

The Candy Crush game show just got a million times worse and I didn’t think that was possible – Just Jared

Demi Lovato doesn’t care that a hacked picture of her tit cleavage is out there – IDLYITW

Memaws and Pepaws are going to party all night (read: until 9:58pm) tonight because CBS renewed a ton of shows – SOW

Panty Creamer of the Day: This hot piece from Iron FistPopsugar

Pic: Splash


Night Crumbs

March 22, 2017 / Posted by:

Filter-free Trump hater Michael Shannon is reportedly the frontrunner to play Cable in Deadpool.  I know as much about characters in Deadpool as I do about calculus (I failed twice), but I am all about this for two reasons: 1. The shit he’ll say during the promo tour. And 2. The jorts he’ll wear during the promo tour. – Lainey Gossip

Joanna Krupa wanted her followers to know that she looks at views from a hot tub while not wearing a top – Drunken Stepfather

That skirt ScarJo is wearing looks like Queen Kong’s bush from here – Celebitchy

Something productive I did today: Stare at Emily RideAJetSki’s bikini bottom tan lines for 3 seconds – The Nip Slip

Because our TV screens haven’t been infected with enough CyrusesReality Tea

Here’s Megan Fox  in anotherFrederick’s of Hollywood ad where she’s giving you plastic from forehead to toe – Hollywood Tuna

Even U-Haul lesbians are telling Colton Haynes to slow down – Towleroad

The mini Love, Actually sequel still isn’t out yet, but there is a trailer now – Pajiba

Tragedy isn’t just a song by the Bee Gees, it’s also a word that describes the current state of Jessica Biel’s bangs – Popoholic

This baby looks like Ed SheeranOMG Blog


I’m sure this story about Taraji P. Henson fighting with Nia Long on the set of Empire isn’t a shameless stunt to promote tonight’s episode – Just Jared

Chuck Barris has died and now the gong will never ever gong again – SOW



Night Crumbs

March 21, 2017 / Posted by:

Elizabeth Olsen hit the pap stroll with her new dude, an indie musician named Robbie Arnett, and I can practically hear her conversation with her older-man-loving sisters about her current boyfriend. “Ewww, Lizzie, darling, we don’t get it, how can you put your mouth on balls that don’t have white hairs sprouting out of them?” – Celebitchy

Panty Creamer of the Day: Charlie Hunnam in sweatpants – Lainey Gossip 

Bella Hadid’s nipples are still on vacation from her vacation of a life – Drunken Stepfather 

Today, please direct your sympathy toward Kim Zocliak, whose Nutri-Grain bars were squeezed by airport security in Germany – Reality Tea 

Elizabeth Olsen ain’t the only one whose getting on a hot musician nobody knows. Kate Hudson is apparently humping on musician Danny FujikawaThe Nip Slip 

And the RUnaissance continues, J.J. Abrams’ production company is doing a TV show about the rise of RuPaul in NYC in the 1980s – Towleroad

Ariel Winter is giving me “recurring cast member on Mob Wives” – Hollywood Tuna

I guess the money situation on Big Bang Theory got worked out – SOW

Either I’m going wonk-eyed (it’s possible) or the arches in Olivia Wilde’s eyebrow situation need to be synchronized – Popoholic

If while watching the 20th cycle of America’s Next Top Model in 2013, you thought to yourself, “I really want to see Marvin’s peen,” your wish came true over three years later – (NSFW) OMG Blog

Ellen DeGenres is a lightweight – IDLYITW

Poke at me when a major character in a big-budget superhero movie has full-on, genitals-to-genitals gay or lesbian sex – Jezebel

The internet has blue balls now, because Orlando Bloom went paddle boarding with his shorts ON – Popsugar

Prepare yourself for a chorus of dancing Glen Cocos, because Mean Girls the Musical is finally coming – Just Jared

Pic: GC Images/Getty


Night Crumbs

March 20, 2017 / Posted by:

A-Rod’s sister called JLo her sister-in-law on Instagram. You know shit must be serious if JLo is taking face-tuned selfies with the family for Instagram. At this rate, they’ll be engaged by Easter, married by the Fourth of July, he’ll be caught with a side piece by Halloween and they’ll be divorced by Thanksgiving. Well, at least she won’t have to get his ass a Christmas present – Lainey Gossip 

Errr, does La Perla know that they could’ve just shot pictures of a dead-eyed mannequin and they would’ve ended up with the same result for much, much less money? – Drunken Stepfather

Why isn’t the United Nations investigating the violation of Kim Zolciak’s wigs in Germany?! – Reality Tea 

Tim Allen did that really smart thing where he compared something that’s not Nazi Germany to Nazi Germany – Celebitchy

Talk about tacky! Peach panties with a maroon dress?! – The Nip Slip 

AJ McClean and his wife are parents again and their new daughter’s name sounds like the name of an up-and-coming country singer/Bluebird Cafe waitress on NashvillePopsugar

My ears and loins really need to hear the audio of Mads Mikkelsen saying, “After all, I am a bitch.” – Pajiba

Get a big bowl of ice ready because you’ll need to dunk your nips in there after they catch on fire from this airplane performance by a Glittery Gay of YouTube Twitter – Towleroad

Nina Adgal is in Maxim looking like she fell asleep while fapping – Hollywood Tuna

The power of a beach vacation: it can even make Bella Hadid look alive in the face – Popoholic

Wonder Woman had another Wonder Baby – Just Jared

Bill Condon basically dropped a “well, bless her heart” on Lindsay LohanOMG Blog

At least there’s some good news to deliver today – Jezebel

And thank you for all the dick jokes and Bertney stories, Fish! – The Superficial 

Pic: Instagram


Night Crumbs

March 17, 2017 / Posted by:

The Weeknd brought Selena Gomez home to Toronto where he bought out an entire screening of Get Out for them. Either The Weeknd is seriously coochmatized or the relationship contract he signed states that he has to pull stunts like that – Lainey Gossip

Here’s Anne Hathaway airing her Oscar-winning pits out on ElleDrunken Stepfather 

Strangely enough, capris would go perfectly with that tank top Tom Hiddleston wore on the beach – Celebitchy

The Real Housewives are going on tour, in case you want to spend a chunk of money to see 2 entertaining messes and 3 drips talk about boring shit – Reality Tea

I’m going to have to quote Jabba the Trump and call this fake news, because I’m guessing it’s about Tiffany Trump and there’s no way he cares enough about her to do something like this – The Superficial 

Noel Fielding will be one of the new hosts of the Great British Bake-OffPajiba

Feeling herself: Ariel Winter is – Popoholic

Thank God that Emma Watson will make a ton of money from Beauty and the Beast, because maybe she finally pay off her student loans – Just Jared

WWPLS? (What Would Pepper LaBeija Say?): Ryan Murphy will take on the NYC ball scene of the 80s in his new show for FX – Jezebel

The trailer for the new season of RuPaul’s Drag Race had me 1 second in but it really had me at Lisa KudrowOMG Blog

Emily RideAJetSki served up her signature comatose zombie poses for DKNY – Hollywood Tuna

And finally, let’s end this St. Patrick’s Day with Robert Downey Jr. in a shamrock onesie – SOW

Pic: Splash


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