Category: Night Crumbs

Night Crumbs

June 28, 2016 / Posted by:

Leah Remini is shooting a TV series that will EXPOSE the way Scientology destroys families. Leah Remini’s mission to take Scientology down and burn up the Thetans on Little Lord Miscavige’s Scientolohole is the best thing she’s done since Living DollsThe Superficial 

Bradley Cooper laid down some sweet moves and fist action at Glastonbury – Lainey Gossip 

I’m sure that just like Charlotte McKinney, you too pour your morning coffee while in full makeup, full hair and a push-up bra that makes your magnificent chichis look like they’re struggling to breathe – Drunken Stepfather

And here’s today’s episode of “How Farrah Abraham Is Showing Everyone That A Dried Dog Turd Would Make A Better Mother Than Her” Reality Tea 

CITIZEN’S ARREST! CITIZEN’S ARREST! Jail that thief Bella Thorne for stealing my mom’s jeans from 1984 – Hollywood Tuna 

New York City is planning a memorial to the victims of the Orlando massacre and other victims of hate crimes – Towleroad

Chelsea Handler says she had two abortions at the age of 16 and doesn’t regret them at all  – IDLYITW

On a lighter note, here’s a question mark of a person working the ho stroll – Popoholic

Ugh, my arm is starting to cramp. Will those assholes get the picture already?” is probably what Tom Hiddleston is thinking in this natural and candid picture of him and Taylor SwiftPopsugar

If you’ve always wanted to put The Fat One’s juicy wiener in your mouth, your dream is about to come true! – SOW

Candice Swanepoel’s nips are in Vogue Spain – (NSFW) The Nip Slip

Prince Hot Ginge and I really are soulmates… – Celebitchy

“The public doesn’t find me annoying or hate me nearly enough, so why don’t I fix that by doing a talk show?!”Drew Barrymore Just Jared

Pic: Wenn.com

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Night Crumbs

June 27, 2016 / Posted by:

Robert Pattinson showed up looking like this to the Dior show. Instead of laughing at his jacked-up bangs, I’m going to praise him for bravely going out in public after losing a bet that involved him letting his drunk friend cut his hair like 90s George Clooney with baby scissors – Lainey Gossip 

We get it, Chris Martin, you wanna do RiRiCelebitchy

It came from the sea…… – Drunken Stepfather 

Now that it seems like CoCo has sadly retired as the Queen of Camel Toes, somebody needs to take her place and it looks like Erika Jayne has thrown her camel toe into the running – Reality Tea

Ariel Winter and her boyfriend broke up – The Superficial 

Survivor is $25,000 richer (well, $1.50 richer after lawyer fees) thanks to Mike Huckabee using “Eye of the Tiger” without permission at a Kim Davis rally – Towleroad

As expected, Abby Lee Miller declared that she’s guilty of bankruptcy fraud in court today – Jezebel

Two minutes after these pictures were taken, Brit Brit Spears walked by, mistook Natasha Poly for a Flamin’ Hot Cheeto and swallowed her up – The Nip Slip 

For why does Natalie Portman have Wonka Runts on her loafers? – Popoholic

Olivia Munn looks so calm and relaxed like she just finally pooted out a stubborn fart  – Hollywood Tuna

This is what Judd Apatow’s soft peen looks like – (NSFW) OMG Blog

You know, now that Jamie Lynn Spears mentions it, “I Found Out I Was Knocked Up In A Gas Station Bathroom” sounds like the name of a country song by a Spears sister – HuffPo

Lamar Odom is reportedly still partying and boozing – Starcasm

Jay Leno lived to tell the tale of being in a car as it flipped – SOW

Ben Affleck’s chichis are looking as luscious as ever – Just Jared

I thought that was Dorinda Medley next to the Dalai Lama and he probably did too. Please nobody break his heart by telling him that he shook hands with a much less famous trick – Popsugar

Note: The CAPTION THIS Contest’s lazy ass has called in sick today. It’ll be back tomorrow.

Pic: Splash

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Night Crumbs

June 24, 2016 / Posted by:

Ben Affleck arrived to the set of his movie with his belt buckle undone… Do I even want to know what he was doing in that car? That relaxed smile and undone belt buckle tells me that he was probably thoroughly enjoying slow-motion footage of his bro crush Tom Brady running with a ball – Lainey Gossip 

Ariel Winter shits on the bitches who had something bad to say about her extremely elegant graduation dress – Celebitchy

Sophia Bush is giving me 70s hitchhiker – Drunken Stepfather

To the surprise of absolutely no one, a class action lawsuit has been born thanks to Anton Yelchin’s death – The Superficial 

One of the dudes from Million Dollar Listing L.A. had to take out a restraining order against a crazed dermatologist for allegedly making anti-Semetic death threats – Reality Tea 

Calvin Harris and friends worked their rolled-up athletic socks bulges on Instagram – Towleroad

Blake NotSoLively’s dress looks like something a spoiled little rich girl would wear to her Victorian-themed 5th birthday party – Popoholic

What’s more painful? Listening to Tony Robbins talk or burning your feet on hot coals? – HuffPo

Heidi Klum peddles bras while not wearing a bra – Egotastic

I forgot about Jon Gosselin, and his son Collin may have forgotten about him too, because they haven’t seen each other in over a year – Starcasm

It took me a few blinks to realize that this wasn’t a white actor in blackface, it was just George Hamilton as Colonel Sanders – SOW

Bradley Cooper’s piece rolled out of bed and went straight to some event – Hollywood Tuna 

MESS = Taylor Lautner playing a doctor named Cassidy Cascade on the next season of Scream QueensPopsugar

Chloe Grace Moretz wanted wanted a boob job and ass reduction at 16  – HuffPo

Sorry Posh, but THE QUEEN is totally going to take your man – Just Jared

Pic: FameFlynet

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Night Crumbs

June 23, 2016 / Posted by:

Lainey has a blind item about a famous man whore, partier and actor who is currently in a serious relationship, but sends one of his exes a fancy purse every month so she’ll keep her mouth shut about how he has herpes. My first guess was Leonardo DiCatcho, but I think he’s currently allergic to serious relationships. My second guess was Gerard Butler, but I don’t think he gives a shit enough to send a hush present. So I’m going to go with my third guess, Ed Asner – Lainey Gossip 

In case you don’t watch Real DrunkWives of New York City and want to know about Bethenny Frankel’s health situation, she has fibroids – Reality Tea 

Amber Heard apparently thought Johnny Depp was passing his queso-covered peen to another – Celebitchy

What the head bitch of Disney meant to say is, “Huh? What personal problems?”, before diving into the pool of money he made from Pirates of the Caribbean crap – The Superficial 

FYI: That child who sings “Stitches” isn’t gay, but he did come out as the kind of dude who watches his own interviews on YouTube – Towleroad

Louisiana blossom Brit Brit Spears continues to show us that she’s the queen of weaves, twirling and fashion – Drunken Stepfather

Ben Affleck loves that slur-fest of an interview where he made it clear that he wants to butt birth one of Tom Brady’s babies – Jezebel

A reminder that we’re all older than we’ve ever been: Nintendo 64 turned 20 – Egotastic

This list of the 7 best songs of the 90s is invalid without some Adina Howard on it – Pajiba

I have no idea what’s going on with Chloe Grace Moretz’s outfit – Popoholic

Taylor Swift’s ass pads may have made an encore appearance on her butt – IDLYITW

Disappointment IS me thinking these were new pictures of Bai Ling. Confusion IS me wondering who in the hell Bip Ling is – Hollywood Tuna 

Since the second season of True Detective was shit, The Texas T-Rex may go back to save it during its time of need  – Starcasm

Kanye West must be Chun-Li’s new stylist – OMG Blog

David Beckham wore too many clothes to Fashion Week in Paris – Popsugar

Kelly McGillis was attacked by a crazed stalker – Just Jared

Pic: Tradesy

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Night Crumbs

June 22, 2016 / Posted by:

Goopy Paltrow still hasn’t consciously uncoupled from talking about her conscious uncoupling – Lainey Gossip 

The mom of Justin Theroux’s ex says that his world and Jennifer Aniston’s world is full of darkness and they’re acting out that darkness. I didn’t know that the mom of Justin Theroux’s ex is God Warrior – Celebitchy

Kenya Moore denies going full Kenya Moore on the set of some show – Reality Tea 

Bella Thorne served up some 70s soft-core porn star realness in Galore magazine – Drunken Stepfather

Nico Tortorella goes wherever his peen takes him – Towleroad

I want to listen to Alexander Skarsgard talk at length about a hard, loaded weapon, but this is not what I had in mind  – The Superficial 

Martha Stewart was better off not knowing the name of the wonk-eyed algae eater who is usually stuck to Kim Kartrashian’s asshole – Jezebel

Lea Michele did topless yoga – Egotastic

David Duchovny smeared peanut butter on his mug and let his dog lick it off in the name of charity! – SOW

Peg Bundy definitely wore that dress first and she definitely wore it better – Hollywood Tuna 

Lea Michele is coming for Jennifer Aniston’s Smart Water contract, I see. And I can’t believe this Crumbs has links to two Lea Michele posts. What year is this? – Popoholic

What many people make in a year, Drake lost by betting on some basketball game – IDLYITW

More proof that Emma Stone is in goddamn everything – Pajiba

Break out the baby bottles full of barley water! Scientology has a new young mind to try and brainwash – Popsugar

What in Chess King circa 1989 HELL is Ricky Martin wearing? – Just Jared

Pic: Getty

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Night Crumbs

June 21, 2016 / Posted by:

Beyonce is on beycation in Hawaii, and since the promo never ends, she wore a lemon crown and necklace. Her lemon crown and necklace are probably solid gold and cost $90,000 each, but I can’t wait to see the members of the Beyhive work their own cheap bitch version made from gold rope and empty lemon juice containers – Lainey Gossip 

Tom Hiddleston claims that his butt is not dangerous. Um, I’m sure Tom’s butt is dangerous after he eats Taco Bell. Everyone’s butt is dangerous after eating Taco Bell – Celebitchy

And Andy Cohen will beg Lauri Peterson to go back to Real Housewives of Orange County in 3…2…. – Reality Tea 

Michael Jackson was reportedly into some dark-sided and unholy shit that’ll make you wish you could drill a hole into your skull and pour bleach in – The Superficial 

Bella Thorne Snapchatted her bare back – Hollywood Tuna 

In “people have wars in their countries” news, Billy Eichner and Ross Matthews got into a Twitter fight over a dumb Capital One commercial – Towleroad

WARNING: Pull out the eyeball Band-Aids, because Elle Fanning’s V Magazine spread is so edgy it’ll leave paper cuts on your eyes – Drunken Stepfather

And keep those eyeball Band-Aids out, because you may get poked in the eye by Jennifer Aniston’s hard nip – The Nip Slip 

Katy Perry either shaded Taylor Swift with her perfume name or everybody is spraining several muscles from all the reaching – Jezebel

Kermit the Frog should really sue Good Morning America for this – Pajiba

Okay, but I’m still waiting for an action figure of the Backin’ Up Lady  – OMG Blog

Blake NotSoLively looks like she’s wearing someone’s mother’s prom dress from the 60s – Popoholic

Hilary Duff’s trainer may be her piece after all – HuffPo

This mini Mean Girls reunion had me at “Chibi the Chihuahua” – Boy Culture 

Iggy Azalea didn’t throw all of Nick Young’s shit out of her house after all – Just Jared

I’m a little disappointed about the fact that THE QUEEN’s iPad isn’t gold too – Popsugar

Pic: Beyonce.com

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Night Crumbs

June 20, 2016 / Posted by:

Goopy Paltrow’s Manhattan white palace is on the market for $12.8 million and it’s been described as an apartment that “floats above the cobblestone streets like a pale, dreamy cloud.” That pretentious ass description makes me want to barf…. all over that kitchen that’s more sterile and ice cold than Goopy herself – Lainey Gossip 

Oh yeah, I forgot that professional paparazzi bikini model LeAnn Rimes is a singer too – Celebitchy

Meghan King Edmonds from The Real PlasticWives of Orange County is knocked up – Reality Tea

One of the Pretty Little Liars did her best JLo cosplay – Drunken Stepfather

 Charlotte McKinney’s magnificent chichis braved the heat for the sake of a little pap action – The Superficial 

What in slutty space granny HELL is Lindsay Lohan wearing? – The Nip Slip 

The Photoshop Awards: Priyanka Chopra’s armpit – Jezebel

Looking, a show I forgot happened, is back with a trailer for its 2-hour finale movie – Towleroad

Germany’s Finest Rose kissed another delicate blossom, and I’m guessing it’s because they’re genuine lesbians in love and not because they’re shameless attention whores – Hollywood  Tuna 

RIP Penny DreadfulPajiba

MiserAlba’s shoes look like orthopedic goth sandals from the 90s – Popoholic

That dog totally just butt burped on Heidi Klum’s tit – SOW

Carly Rae Jepsen is doing shampoo commercials in Japan – OMG Blog

What I’m getting from that picture is that RiRi really wants LeBron James to jizz out his number on her stomach – IDLYITW

Idris Elba, Alexander Skarsgard and Prince Hot Ginge, take note, this is how you should pose on the red carpet – Popsugar

Panty Creamers of the Day: Alexander Skarsgard and Theo James bring their nipples out in some movie – Just Jared

Pic: GOOP

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Night Crumbs

June 17, 2016 / Posted by:

Opera Australia’s opening night of Carmen was the most important star-studded event of the year and that’s solely because SHANNEN DOHERTY was there! Even her friend Holly Marie Combs is thinking to herself, “Tip me over and pour me out, I can’t believe I’m touching thee Brenda Walsh!” – Lainey Gossip 

Is this Posh Beckham or Kira from The Dark Crystal in a brown wig? – Celebitchy

Most of The Real Housewives of Orange County reunited for the show’s 10th anniversary, and the pictures look like they were taken at a Bad Plastic Surgery Convention – Reality Tea 

Lindsay Lohan showed Taylor Swift how the shameless staged photo shoot is really done – Drunken Stepfather

Another one of Josh Duggar’s victims may have come forward – The Superficial 

Xtina put out a song for the victims of the Orlando massacre – Towleroad

Nick Minaj, on the other hand, unfollowed a fan on Twitter for wondering why she hasn’t said anything about Orlando – Boy Culture

Because one of Ashley Greene’s nipple is hard and the other one isn’t, it looks like her tits are winking – Hollywood Tuna

Emily RideAJetSki’s velvet ensemble is very “Willy Wonka as a 70s pimp” and I don’t hate it – Popoholic

Disneyland really is the Happiest Place on Earth if it made Kanye West actually produce a smile – HuffPo

Dexter’s sister (and ex-wife in real-life) got secret married – Just Jared

Logo finally announced which queens will battle it out in RuPual’s Drag Race All Stars 2, and I’m guessing Shangela is hiding under Roxxxy Andrews’ dress – NewNowNext

Justin Theroux managed to help Jennifer Aniston up some stairs even though he was just electrocuted. I mean, he was, right? That’s why his hair looks like that, right?  – Popsugar

Diane Keaton wants some dick – SOW

Pic: Getty

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Night Crumbs

June 16, 2016 / Posted by:

A GIF of THE QUEEN telling Prince William to stand his ass up is making the rounds, and it’s the posh British version of an abuelita burning you with a stank eye as she reaches for her chancleta. That “reaching for her chancleta” move tells you that you better stand up, straighten up and shut the fuck up – Lainey Gossip 

Bella Hadid is ready for her third face – Celebitchy

Jules Wainstein of The Real Drunkwives of New York City filed for divorce after her Keebler Elf of a husband cheated on her – Reality Tea

Question: Is Backdoor Farrah’s ass skin made of plastic or did she use an Instagram filter to erase all her butt pimples? –  The Superficial 

How many of Oscar the Grouch’s relatives died to make Bella Thorne’s ugly sandals? – Drunken Stepfather

The Wicked movie is finally coming out….. in 3 long years – Jezebel

RuPaul gives his thoughts about the massacre in Orlando – Towleroad

Vanessa Hudgens’ “covering face with coffee” skills are getting slightly better – Popoholic

Natalie Dormer’s top looks like a Christmas placemat I made for my mom in the second grade – Hollywood Tuna 

A Married With Children reunion will probably never ever happen – HuffPo

Panty Creamer of the Day: Vintage Stanley Tucci struttin’ his ass in a tank top for a Levi’s commercial – SOW

Do we even have to go through the whole election process now that THE MIGHTY O has chosen her candidate? – Boy Culture

BREAKING: Jennifer Aniston did a pap stroll without a bottle of Smart Water in her hand – Just Jared

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Night Crumbs

June 15, 2016 / Posted by:

Duchess Kate’s style is usually about as boring as a potato flake to me, but she wore a hat that made one of my senses tingle: my sense of taste. Because that raw Cinnabon hat would be delicious if it was perfectly baked, covered with frosting and served with an Oreo Chillata™ – Celebitchy

Speaking of being as boring as a potato flake, Blake NotSoLively talked about global warming with Marie ClaireLainey Gossip 

Reality TV swallowed up another marriage: The Jewish Asian chick from The Real Housewives of New York (you know, the one who tells everyone she’s Jewish and Asian) is getting a divorce from her bit-sized husband – Reality Tea 

In case you missed it, here’s Samantha Bee letting out all her feelings about the Orlando massacre and gun control – The Superficial 

And because I’m really good at segues, let’s go from gun control to Kim Kartrashian’s plastic Honey Baked Ham ass in GQDrunken Stepfather

Richard Simmons sends love and healing thoughts to Orlando – Towleroad

So it looks like next season’s episodes of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills will have 100% less talk about Lyme disease in them – Jezebel

Oh, hey again, Rita Ora’s nipple knobs – The Nip Slip

GOOP who? Celine Dion is about to become the GREATEST LIFESTYLE GURU IN DA WORLD! – Just Jared

Aubrey O’Day and Shannon Bex’s hair color looks like watered down piss in an ash tray – Hollywood Tuna

Christina Hendrick’s abuelita of the bride dress is not the look – Popoholic

Now that they mention it, there are more mattress stores than Starbucks in this country – Pajiba

Argentine footballer peen alert! – (NSFW) – OMG Blog 

Kelly Osbourne got a head tattoo to show support for the Orlando victims – Starcasm

Lea Michele and her new piece (the hot dude from Lipstick Jungle) held hands – Popsugar

There was tons of fucking sequins at The Neon Demon premiere – IDLYITW

Pic: Wenn.com

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