Having famous, rich, attractive parents sounds like winning the kid lottery. But for Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher’s kids, it’s closer to winning $200 on a scratcher than hitting it big on Powerball. The Kunis-Kutchers are planning to eschew nepotism and force their kids make it on their own. According E!, Ashton appeared on his Punk’d pal Dax Shepard’s Armchair Expert podcast and revealed that his kids aren’t getting trust funds from mommy and daddy.
It’s three weeks until Halloween, which means we’re already…what, two, three weeks into talking about Christmas. Mila Kunis has Christmas on the brain, because she’s promoting A Bad Moms Christmas. She’s also a mom to two little kids. So what how are Mila and Ashton Kutcher celebrating Christmas with their kids this year? Well, not with presents, that’s for sure.
It’s been a while since the true heyday of Ashton Kutcher, when he was wearing Von Dutch hats and Kabbalah string while boning any side piece who would listen to him talk about Twitter while then-wife Demi Moore was out of town. These days, I just figured he and now-wife Mila Kunis lived off her Jim Beam bucks, showed up on the Bachelorette and occasionally acted in a shitty movie to pay for all those courtside seats. Seriously, the only person to go to more basketball games than those two is mid-90s Madonna, and that was only because she was a warm-up for the Chicago Bulls.
The second human that Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher are now in charge of came into the world on Wednesday and ever since then, their 2-year-old daughter Wyatt Isabelle has probably been thinking to herself, “I hope they give that baby a worse name than me, I hope they give that baby a worse name than me.”
Mila birthed out a boy and I was hoping that they’d name him Earp. But KuKu didn’t do that and instead, they paid tribute to Dimitri Marick from All My Children and Amber Portwood from Teen Mom by naming him Dimitri Portwood! The baby name news was dropped on Ashton Kutcher’s site A Plus today:
Today, A Plus is happy to announce that Dimitri Portwood Kutcher was born at 1:21 a.m. on November 30, weighing 8 pounds and 15 ounces. Dimitri is the couple’s second child, after having their daughter Wyatt in October of 2014.
Mila was born in Ukraine and speaks fluent Russian (see: that hot video of Mila bitching out a reporter in Russian), so that explains the name Dimitri. But Demi Moore is probably looking at that name and thinking that it’s Ashton’s way of letting her know that he hasn’t let go!!!
Dimitri Portwood sounds like the name of an 80s soap opera character whose mother is a Russian socialite and whose father is a Texas oil mogul, so I love it! But poor Wyatt Isabelle didn’t get a glamorous 80s soap opera name. Somebody pass her name-changing papers so she can change her name to Ekaterina Carrington.
And here’s a stage 10 knocked up Mila in L.A. just a day before she gave birth.
Pics: Splash, ABC Daytime
Mila Kunis is the latest Hollywood actress to come forward and blow the lid (or at least crack it a little to let the steam out) off of the truth about being an actress in Hollywood. Mila wrote an essay about sexism called “You’ll Never Work In This Town Again…” for Medium. Mila writes that she was threatened to be sent to the end of the unemployment line when she refused to bring the sexy.
The latest issue of Glamour features Mila Kunis saying “bye, bitch” to, as the English call it, slap. For us Americans, that’s makeup. I personally don’t wear makeup, but it’s six billion degrees with 500% humidity today in New York, so I’m going to point every woman I see wearing makeup to the newsstand because there’s no reason to suffer through this heat with a full face.
The sans fards selling point is a bit of a wash in the issue itself. Mila is done up for the cover and inside spread, but she’s working an Alicia Keys-approved #nomakeup look on the back cover. There’s also an “undone-beauty guide” in the magazine. Which is kind of like your parents promising you Six Flags and then taking you to Rye Playland, aka LIES. But they do let Mila push her “I’m normal and chill” schtick.