Category: Melissa Rivers

Melissa Rivers Shits On Kathy Griffin For Shitting On Her Mother’s Legacy

May 14, 2015 / Posted by:

If you’ve been looking for a reason to start your weekend drinking early, then you have found a reason in the image of Melissa Rivers, Kathy Griffin and Joan Rivers’ legacy having one big ole’ scat party.

When Kathy Griffin busted out of Fashion Police, she burped up a statement (which Lena Dunham helped write, because UGH) where she basically said that she and the show were like two power bottoms trying to hook up together. They just didn’t work and didn’t connect. Kathy thought the show was too mean and she didn’t want to partake in body-shaming. (Defamer claimed that the real reason why Kathy quit is because E! was getting ready to pink slip her for being a thorn in their taint.) Well, two months after Kathy checked out of Fashion Police, Melissa Rivers has spit out her thoughts. Melissa thinks that Kathy destroyed her mother’s legacy with her exit statement.

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“Fashion Police” Was Too Mean For Kathy Griffin So She Quit That Bitch

March 12, 2015 / Posted by:

Well, that lasted about as long as my patience while watching Ghouliana Rancid interview anybody on the red carpet. When Kathy Griffin said that she signed up to be the head bitch of the Fashion Police, I figured she was doing it for Joan Rivers and didn’t think she would last more than a year, because when you think of fashion, the last ho you think of is Kathy Griffin. Actually, the last ho you think of is Kanye West, so Kathy Griffin is second to last. But well, she lasted a lot less longer than a year.

About two weeks after Kelly Osbourne sashayed out of the exit door and a quick minute after Kathy said that she wouldn’t tell the “patchouli and weed” joke that Ghouliana made about Zendaya, she declared on Facebook tonight that she’s completely over Fashion Police. In a post where she said her age and how many awards she’s won, Kathy said that she doesn’t want to take part in a shit fest where bitches drag people’s looks. Kathy thought Fashion Police was just going to be about making fun of dresses. So basically, it feels like Kathy spread her legs, squatted over Ghouliana and let out a wet queef.

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E! says that when Fashion Police comes back on March 30th, Melissa Rivers will take over for Kathy and both Ghouliana and Brad Goreski will be back. Kelly has already thrown some support at Kathy by tweeting a picture of them touching tongues.

Now Kathy Griffin is free to do a gossip show on CNN with Anderson Cooper where she’ll tell rim jokes and he’ll giggle out of his jock strap.

Joan Rivers was Fashion Police, but of course E! is going to try to keep that shit alive. I don’t even know why they’re bothering bringing Melissa Rivers on for one episode. Why postpone the inevitable? They’re obviously going to replace Kathy with Kanye West and replace the rest with Kim, Kourtney and Khloe. The entire show will be Kanye worshipping his looks while Kummy, the Slow One and Khlozilla take turns sucking on his ass lips. I don’t know what E! is waiting for?

Joan Rivers Has Been Moved Out Of ICU, Says Melissa Rivers

September 3, 2014 / Posted by:

A few days ago, there were reports that doctors were bringing Joan Rivers out of the medically induced coma they put her in and her family was hoping that she’d wake up and curse all of their bitch asses out for making her wear a hospital gown that wasn’t made by Chanel, lined with fur and embedded with jewels from her QVC collection. But yesterday, Melissa Rivers issued a statement saying that her mom was still on life support and today, she issued another statement on Facebook saying that her mom has been moved out of ICU and into a private room at Mount Sinai Hospital in NYC:

“My mother has been moved out of intensive care and into a private room where she is being kept comfortable. Thank you for your continued support.”

Melissa has kept her lips all the way shut about her mom’s current condition, but a source tells E! that Joan is getting better and all of those reports that claim she’ll soon be wrestling Elizabeth Taylor in the afterworld are not true.

Award show season starts up again in a few months and if Joan isn’t around for it, Fashion Police will be nothing but Ghouliana Rancic, Kelly Osbourne and George Iforgothislastname sitting around while saying to each other, “Well…I thought she looked nice.” So, somebody get Kathy Griffin and tell her to return the favor and slap Joan awake.

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