Angelina Jolie was just announced as possibly/probably/most likely going to be in a new Marvel comic superhero movie called The Eternals. Well, Marvel is really working overtime to get this movie on the pre-pre-pre hype train. We’re hearing even more rumors like how the male lead superhero could be a big gay. Specifically, it could be Hercules, seen above making out with an alternate-universe cowboy-style Wolverine. Gird your loins, comic book geeks: the homophobic ones among you are about to come out in full force.
The Hollywood Reporter is saying that Angelina Jolie is on her way to getting that sweet, sweet Marvel money. Well, well, well, I’m sure it’s a coincidence that Angie is taking a break from making HIGH ART by getting Marvel money and it has nothing to do with the rumors that she’s broke.
Angie has done a bunch of action type stuff in the past, like that Russian-spy movie Salt which she stole from Tom Cruise, and she was Lara Croft, and she met Brad Pitt while playing a spy, and she’s even done a comic book movie before when she starred in Wanted. But Angelina has yet to make her way into one of those big-budget, insanely over-paid superhero movies that break the box office. Well, cross it off her bucket list because it looks like Angelina is about to star in Marvel Studios’ The Eternals.
The Hollywood Reporter is saying that Scarlett Johansson is going to get a huge ton of cash for working on the standalone Black Widow movie which recently got its director. According to THR, Scarlett’s salary is equal to what the delicious Captain of America, Chris Evans, and what the hunky God of Thunder and Muscle Mass, Chris Hemsworth, were paid for Avengers: Infinity War, Captain America: Civil War and Thor: Ragnarok. Scarlett will be earning a grandios $15 million for playing Black Widow in her own movie.
Anyone still holding out a shred of hope that Disney will have a change of heart and re-hire James Gunn to direct the next Guardians of the Galaxy film better lower their expectations down to zero percent (I’m looking at you, Dave Bautista). Because if this news is true, then DC might be in the midst of poaching James Gunn to the other side of superhero franchises.
Marvel decided that because The Emmys were last night, the heterosexuals of America also deserved a lil something, something, so they released the Captain Marvel trailer today for all of the nerds out there.
Brie Larson, who plays the titular Captain Marvel (how many of you giggled at the words “titular”?), was on Good Morning America today to reveal the trailer herself. This is the first Marvel Studios project with a female lead since they started making movies 10 years ago with the release of Iron Man, so it’s kind of a big deal. Cut to Scarlett Johansson screeching into a pillow somewhere: “Why couldn’t it have been me?!”
We are one step closer to seeing Scarlett Johansson kicking ass in a movie while giving me the bare minimum of emotional output and dressed in a black leather bodysuit. But don’t worry, she won’t be playing an Asian person. Not this time, anyway.