E! News pretty much shot a million more holes into Brooks Ayers’ “I swear I’ve got cancer” claims yesterday when they posted proof that he faked his chemotherapy bills and got a rep from City of Hope to confirm that they’ve never treated the slimy douche dingle from the Real Housewives of Orange County. Brooks told E! News last week that he does have cancer and he showed them chemotherapy bills from City of Hope as proof. But after getting called out, Brooks admitted to E! that the chemotherapy bills he showed them were as real as whatever the hell Vicki Gunvalson put in her face.
On the Real Housewives of Orange County last season, a huge chunk of time was spent on whether or not Vicki Gunvalson’s (now ex) piece Brooks Ayers was and is faking cancer. New Housemess and piece of dehydrated celery, Meghan King Edmonds, was one of the first to say that something in the milk ain’t cancer. In one of the earlier episodes, a psychic told Meghan, Tamra Judge and Heather Dubrow that shifty and shady Brooks doesn’t have cancer. They decided to investigate that shit and stopped short of hiring Detective La Toya to get to the bottom of everything. Meanwhile, Brooks and Vicki kept insisting that he has the Big C and those demonic hags will rot (well, not really rot since plastic doesn’t do that) in hell for accusing a poor, sick man of faking the sicks. Brooks recently claimed he got chemotherapy treatments at City of Hope and he provided the receipts. But well, City of Hope has released a statement saying, “We don’t know the bitch.”
If you checked inside of Khloe Kartrashian’s veins, you’d probably find nothing but silicone, fillers and extra chunky flecks of LIES flowing through them. Khloe has said before that she stays looking like a plastic Muppet dipped in metallic paint thanks to squats and makeup contouring. Khloe has stepped away from filming the upcoming 36-part E! docu-series Khloe Saves Lamar to pimp out her new book Strong Looks Better Naked and she is once again howling about how not even an ounce of filler has filled her mug and how her Butterball turkey ass is cage and hormone-free.
“Big Papa Frankie – he lets me call him that – asked me out weeks ago and we had a beautiful long date and he told me he loved me, showered me with gifts and promised me that we’d be in each other’s hearts forever.”
Today, Pope Francis was like:
“Errr, yeah, we went out, but after 5 minutes, I acted like I had to go to the bathroom and left while blocking her number on my phone.”
We’ve all been there.