I know adding the word “messy” in that headline was extremely redundant of me; I mean, is there any other kind of Kardashian break-up? Yesterday it was revealed 39-year-old Kourtney Kardashian dumped her 25-year-old boy toy Younes Bendjima. Today, we’re watching the other Kardashians get into this Younes situation.
Kourtney Kardashian got some attention this week after she launched herself into a messy scripted Twitter fight with her sisters Kim and Khloe Kardashian over some dumb, scripted drama about a family photo shoot. And now she’s getting a little more probably scripted attention.
TMZ says that 39-year-old Kourtney and her 25-year-old model boyfriend Younes Bendjima are over after 2 years with her ending it. Younes confirmed that he’s done with Kourtney by getting photographed in Mexico with an Instagram model named Jordan Ozuna. Jordan reportedly dated Tyga shortly after he split from Kourtney’s sister Kylie Jenner. It’s just like that song from The Lion King: it’s the ciiiiircle of Calabasaaaaaas.
In July, things started to go south after Kourtney Instagrammed a picture of her ass. Younes, clearly forgetting who pays the bills, called Kourtney out by asking “That’s what you need to show to get likes?” (before deleting his comment). Younes always had a problem with Kourtney acting THOTty on social media. Kourtney wasn’t feeling Younes’ possessiveness over her butt pics, and now she’s single.
The only downside is that Kris Jenner will now have to schedule an exit interview, like I’m sure she does with every one of the Kardashian-Jenner males that escape the koven. Luckily, it should be quick and painless. All Younes has to do is promise that he won’t yank too much publicity away from the family by dating a teenager like Kourtney’s previous dude, and he’s good to go.
UPDATE: Younes responded to the rumor that he’s already moved on, and it looks like a new KUWTK story arc has been born.
If you plan on killing your brain by watching the newest season of Keeping Up With The Kardashians (or any season really, the brain-killing is consistent throughout the series) then you are in for a visual treat from one Miss Khloé Kardashian.
Khlozilla took to Instagram to let the world know what was going on with her mouth during the newest season of her show. Apparently she wanted to get the jump on some Internet trolls, knowing her swollen slug-lips would be a topic of discussion.
Because I’m sure your brain keeps important info like this, I’m sure you remember how Kourtney Kardashian‘s boyfriend Younes Bendjima got konfused about what his girlfriend does for “work.” We have an update. And by that I mean, the Kardashians sent out a few statements to E! News through their minions.
25-year-old Younes Bendjima, the current man getting on that Kardashian gravy train, commented on an Instagram picture of 35-year-old Kourtney Kardashian where her ass was showing. No, she wasn’t taking a pic with Kris. Her actual ass was showing, which is about as scandalous as well… a Kardashian showing her ass of on Instagram. If a Kardashian tries to post a picture on IG where she’s not showing her ass, I’m pretty sure Instagram immediately labels the account as “fraudulent” and shuts it down thinking they were hacked.
Younes and Kourtney have been dating for almost two years, so he’s been knowing that Kardashian game for a while. Yet for some reason he still felt the need to write: “That’s what you need to show to get likes?” Um? What? Maybe he doesn’t actually know who he’s dating? Or who her family is? I’m… genuinely confused by the question. Would you ask McDonald’s if they have to sell fries to make money? It’s McDonald’s!
There were some real upside down and sideways looks on display at the The Council of Fashion Designers of America awards in NYC last night. Most notably Whoopi Goldberg giving us Little Bo Peep who lost her sheep and was forced to go to the big city and take out a bank loan for more, wearing her best Big Business suit. The added bonus of that suit is that those giant bell bottoms probably ring so damn loud, the sheep should have no problem finding their way back home.
Other notable looks included: Cate Blanchett‘s tuxedo/ baked potato/ butcher’s apron combo, and the night’s host Issa Rae’s belt that read “Every Nigga Is A Star”. All of those looks and more are in the gallery but for now, we’ve got plenty of high fashion to keep us in “what is going on here”s for a week.