Category: Kim Basinger
Ireland Baldwin Says She Doesn’t Get An Allowance From Her Parents, But Does Acknowledge Her Privilege
Most of us don’t give any thought to Ireland Baldwin unless someone just said “rude,” “thoughtless,” “little,” or “pig” in any capacity and it flashed us right back to that infamous 2007 voicemail, but apparently, she has a TikTok account and has recently taken to it to post several replies to people in the comment section questioning how she makes her money. According to TooFab, Ireland wanted to set the record straight; and while she acknowledges the financial and nepotistic privileges that her famous parents, Kim Basinger and Alec Baldwin, afforded her, she sometimes models and now “works” and doesn’t get an allowance from them, ok?!
Kim Basinger Talked About Her Struggles With Agoraphobia On “Red Table Talk”
Kim Basinger and daughter Ireland Baldwin are on the most recent episode of Red Table Talk to discuss their struggles with anxiety. 68-year-old Kim reveals that she lived with agoraphobia for years. If you’re a psychologist like Dr. Jada Pinkett Smith, you’ll know that agoraphobia is a rare anxiety disorder where people are afraid of getting into situations where they’ll panic. In many cases, the sufferer avoids open, public spaces and crowds. Kim says she constantly stayed at home, was scared of everything, and eventually had to relearn how to drive. Interesting. Before this, my only knowledge of agoraphobia came from that one creepy plant-obsessed guy from Twin Peaks, and Edna Turnblad (John Travolta) from the movie Hairspray. Edna-John is cured of the disorder via a super fun sixties-themed musical montage. Did Kim try a super fun sixties-themed musical montage?
The Razzie Nominations Are Here, And It’s A “mother!” Of A Line-Up
You could just tell from Darren Aronofsky’s rambling on and on and on and…you get the idea…about his twisted Sunday School of a movie, mother!, that he just KNEW he was going to spend the night of the Oscars collecting statue after statue and rubbing shoulders with Meryl Streep. Instead, he’ll get the chance to maybe be the muse for James Franco’s next movie about a turd of a movie (well, if he’s even allowed to make movies again). That’s right, the 38th annual Golden Raspberry Awards nominees were released today, and it looks like those Fifty Shades Of Shit movies have some competition from mother!. Continue reading
Here’s The “Fifty Shades Darker” Trailer: Now With Even Less Sexiness And Charisma!
In the first Fifty Shits of Boring movie, Dakota Johnson and pretty wooden post Jamie Dornan had the chemistry of two paper bowls full of overcooked Malt-O-Meal. I figured that the only way Christian Grey and Anastasia Steele could look less like they wanted to fuck each other is if the roles were recast with John Travolta and Kelly Preston. But it looks like the makers of the sequel Fifty Shits Darker somehow managed to make the second movie even less sexier than the first one. Congrats to them!
The trailer for Fifty Shits Darker was released today, and besides every single trick looking like their Ambien just kicked in, this mess looks like it’s part watered down remake of Eyes Wide Shut and part horror movie. There’s a helicopter crash! There’s Kim Basinger coming at Jamie Dornan while thinking to herself, “Fuck my career.” There’s an angry dude coming at Dakota. And there’s a spooky chick who keeps stalking Dakota. The producers should definitely try to re-market this as a horror movie. I mean, I have a feeling that Fifty Shits Darker is going to leave most of the audience screaming. They’ll be screaming at themselves for paying actual money for this crap, and they’ll be screaming at Kim Basinger and Hugh Dancy for needing a check that bad.
IMDB tells me that James Foley, who directed Fifty Shits Darker, also directed Who’s That Girl. The phrase “How the mighty have fallen!” has never been so fitting.
Why, Kim Basinger, Why?!
The first Fifty Shades of Shit movie was duller than wet baking powder but it still made $571 million worldwide and so of course, Universal is shitting out another one. One of the “key roles” in the second movie, Fifty Shades Darker, is Elena Lincoln, the child-whipping pedo who introduced Christian Grey to the world of BDSM when he was 15. There was a funny rumor that Charlize Theron was going to play the role, but that’s not going to happen, because Kim Basinger is going to do it. It’s been over 10 years since Kim has been nominated for a Razzie so maybe she figured that it’s about time she gets another one.
Kim Basinger Thinks Women Would Rule The World If They Just Stopped Having Sex
During an interview with Elle magazine, Kim Basinger (who sort of looks like a partially-thawed version of Nicole Kidman in the picture above) put on her smart glasses and scientific problem solver’s lab coat and schooled us on the steps women, especially actresses, should take if they want to rise up and rule the world. Warning: if you are a lady with a chronic case of the horn-horns, you are not going to like what you’re about to read.
“Women are important, and they have to be in the movies. So, what are you going to do? All we have to do is all hold our hands and stand up and say ‘No.’ We can stop having babies, we can stop having sex, everything. And then women will rule the world. We’d all hold hands and say, ‘No more.’ How about that? That’s it. Women would know their power.”
To be honest, I don’t know if I’d want to hold the hand of a woman who hasn’t been fucked in a while. Can you even imagine the nerve damage? “I’m sorry if I’m crushing your fingers, dear, but I’m just so, so horny.”
I understand what Kim is saying about the babies thing. Threatening to stop making humans is a good negotiation tactic, since it still takes a lady egg to make one. Not to mention that no more babies means a greater chance that super-smart dolphins will take over the world and enslave what’s left of humanity into aquatic servitude (or so I’ve read on the internet). But that “stop having sex” thing would be really difficult. Sure, it would be easy for Kim; all she has to do is picture her ex-husband screaming a bunch of offensive shit while covered in a layer of anger sweat, and she’s instantly turned off for the next six months. But what about the rest of us?