Earlier today we learned that Kevin Smith suffered a massive heart attack after a show in Glendale, CA last night. Kevin came face-to-face with The Widow-Maker, the most diabolical foe Kevin has encountered since the executive at ABC responsible for cancelling Clerks: The Animated Series. Lots of people are thinking good thoughts and sending them Kevin’s way. Some people sent him a prayer or two. Chris Pratt is one of those people. Unfortunately, not everyone with down with his prayers.
Kevin Smith almost died! He tweeted a shot of himself from the hospital bed saying he narrowly avoided death after having a massive “Widow-Maker” heart attack.
Ben Affleck is not going to rest until he’s solved this whole “Hollywood happy hands” problem. After announcing that he was going to lead the charge to vanquish sexual assault, Variety reports that Brother Ben (oh, you didn’t know? He’s a saintly monk now. Forget that old creeper Bruh Ben you used to know) is putting his money where his mouth is by donating all future The Weinstein Company and Miramax earnings to charity.
Sorry, I should clarify: a whole lot of women and a couple dudes. For some reason, the men of Hollywood aren’t exactly rushing to pipe up with their thoughts about the recent dump of sexual harassment allegations against Harvey Weinstein. Which I’m sure is just because they dropped their cellphones in the toilet and have no current means of communication, and not because they had been benefiting from doing business with the alleged creepy shower enthusiast. But for now, we’ve got the thoughts from plenty of actresses and a couple actors, including George Clooney.
Hello all. Welcome to He Said, She Said Theater. Please enjoy today’s performance of She Took To Twitter: A Play in Four Acts #tooktotwitter
Westworld robutt, Evan Rachel Wood, had some unkind words for Ben Affleck on Twitter yesterday. Paper Magazine tweeted a story in which Kevin Smith, at a recent Q&A for an Outfest screening of 1997’s Chasing Amy (via Gay Star News), recounted the time, 20 years ago, when Ben said of his onscreen kiss with co-star Jason Lee “a man kissing another man is the greatest acting challenge an actor can ever face.” Paper magazine said that Kevin said that Ben also said “now, I’m a serious actor.”
The only traumatizing experience I’ve ever had with Uber was when an Uber driver played Hoobstank during the entire ride. No, I don’t know what Hoobastank songs sound like. I used Shazam to find out because I wanted to make sure I got all the details right when filing a police report against that Uber driver for attacking my ear drums like that. But I have heard a couple of scary Uber-related stories and Kevin Smith’s 16-year-old daughter Harley Quinn Smith (born name: Harley Quinn Smith) told one to her Instagram followers over the weekend. And yes, her real name is Harley Quinn Smith. I guess Kevin Smith and his wife really wanted a name that screamed, “MY PARENTS ARE THE BIGGEST FUCKING NERDS ALIVE!” Now on to Harley’s Uber horror story….