The only thing Kendall Jenner has dodged more on the internet than the hate she took for that tone-deaf Pepsi commercial, are the rumors that she’s secretly the gay one. Kendall recently “got candid” about the rumors in the April issue of Vogue, and she candidly swears she’s hetero.
You probably read that as “their faces will fall off on Family Feud” because that’s bound to happen sooner or later when you’ve toyed with the natural law that much. People reports that Kim Kardashian West, her husband and Instagram tease Kanye West, and Kim’s family the Kardashians/Jenners will compete on Family Feud. Just like you, I too thought that nothing on that show could be as irritating as real-life Horrible Boss Steve Harvey. Proven wrong – all of us. Continue reading
Forbes reports that leggy, pouty thing Kendall Jenner is 2017’s highest-paid model. And in juuuuuuust the right level of knife twist, they add that it’s the first time since 2002 that the crown has not been worn by Gisele Bundchen. Meow! Kendall hauled in $22 million over the last year, which I’m sure makes Kris Jenner elated, since her Madam ass takes 40%. Kidding, she gets the family discount (39%).
Keeping Up With The Kardashians premiered last night, and, no, dem babies weren’t mentioned. Pimp Mama Kris is a grower and not a shower, so instead we got the real tea on Kendall Jenner’s Pepsi commercial as a starter to tide us over until we get the unholy trinity pregnancy presumably later in the season.
Kendall Jenner, one of Victoria’s more recent secrets, is skipping the 2017 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show because she has skankier panties to fry and a bigger cash to check. TMZ says expensive underwear company La Perla is tossing millions at Kendall to work her America’s Next Top Model third-episode-of-the-season-caliber modeling into their britches, and that shit comes with a non-compete! So no more Vicky for Kenny, which is a shame because it’s the one night of the year people younger than 900 tune into CBS.
While I’m not surprised La Perla has a non-compete clause, I am surprised they have their French lace panties in a wad thinking Victoria’s Secret is actual competition. Every time I walk by a La Perla, I get anxious thinking they make you take an AP French exam before they let you try on a thong. Meanwhile, I see Victoria’s Secret more often than not slumming it in the corner of a mall next to Old Navy! Check out Kendall’s first Le Perla post below:
This leaves thwacking Ariana Grande with angel wings and playing the “How long can you walk down a runway with a pout while Leonardo DiCaprio wolf whistles from the sideline” game to the likes of Gigi and Bella Hadid and perpetual angel Adriana Lima. I’m also sure Kendall realized Taylor Swift has an album to push, so she would naturally be there. Tay and Leo both view that shit as open hunting season for squad members and girlfriends. Get out while you can, K!
Yes, of this decade. Yes, of this Earth’s decade. Yes, the Kendall Jenner you know from that semi-plastic reality television family. And no, today’s date is not April 1st. Don’t worry, I too had to double-check and make sure they weren’t talking about some charismatic alien fashion icon from a future universe that was also named Kendall Jenner.