Category: Kelly Clarkson

The Billboard Music Awards Fashions Put The “Bored” In Billboard

May 21, 2018 / Posted by:

The Billboard Music Awards were last night and if the red carpet is any indication, it lived up to it’s name because most stars looked as bored as can be. With very few exceptions, most of the night’s looks were uninspired and devoid of whimsy. Nick Jonas (above) looks like he just showed up for his shift at Applebees and still needs to go get his flair from his locker and take a quick shot at the bar before getting started. He’ll be with you in a minute, ok?

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It Looks Like Allison Mack Tried To Lure Emma Watson Into Her Sex Slave Cult On Twitter 

April 24, 2018 / Posted by:

Allison Mack, who used to be known as the harmless unflavored microwave oatmeal blonde from Smallville and is now known as the alleged sex slave recruiter for a cult called NXIVM, is currently sitting in a NYC jail cell on sex trafficking and forced labor charges. Allison pleaded not guilty to the charges, and she and the leader of the sex slave cult, Keith Raniere, are both facing a life locked up in the clink forever. Allison is apparently looking to cut a plea deal with the feds (translation: Bitch is ready to spill it and turn on her former sex slave master), and as she does that, more bits of chunky messy details are popping up in this giant bowl of thick fuckery.

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The Fashion And Folly Of The American Music Awards

November 20, 2017 / Posted by:

The American Music Awards aired on CBS last night in order for you to have something to talk about with your weird cousin Trisha over Thanksgiving weekend. The AMA’s are the perfect empty vessel in which to hold your familial conversational obligations. That said, a few attendees did come to slay. Like Hailee Steinfeld, who, thanks to that leather bra and sharp shoulder pad situation, is seen giving you The Bodyguard starring a young Joan Crawford.

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Kelly Clarkson Says She Was Asexual Before Her Husband

November 5, 2017 / Posted by:

Her husband must be serving A LOT in EVERY area if he was able to rouse her out of what sounds like a casual state of asexuality.

Kelly Clarkson played a private show for SiriusXM listeners at the Highline Ballroom in NYC, and according to People, she revealed that she never felt sexual attraction for anyone until she met her husband Brandon Blackstock. Christ, how lucky is she? She ended up meeting what sounds like the one person in the universe that had the stuff to awaken her dormant sessuality. What are the odds of that? Shouldn’t this be a movie? Continue reading

Kelly Clarkson Is Joining “The Voice” And Not “American Idol” 

May 11, 2017 / Posted by:

Kelly Clarkson was supposedly in talks to make her grand return to American Idol when ABC brings it back from the morgue next year, but there’s been a twist bigger than the one that Ryan Seacrest’s panties get into when his hairstylist uses the wrong kind of pomade. TMZ said that Kelly was making room in her schedule to shoot American Idol, but it turns out that she was making room in her schedule to shoot Idol’s nemesis The Voice. NBC snatching Kelly Clarkson away from ABC is going to lead to the NBC Peacock v. Mickey Mouse bitch fight I’ve been waiting for.

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