Category: Keira Knightley
Keira Knightley Went After Duchess Kate For Looking Too Perfect After Childbirth
Keira Knightley has shared her childbirth experience in an essay entitled “The Weaker Sex” for a book called Feminists Don’t Wear Pink (And Other Lies). Keira spares no detail of the birth of her daughter Edie in May 2015. Gag reflex trigger warning: unless you like your brunch frittata with a side of umbilical cord, skip the essay and stay for the shade of it all, because after giving us the gory/wonderful details of giving birth, Keira had something to say about how Duchess Kate turned from an Autocrat into a Decepticon when she presented a perfect image of herself to the world just hours after giving birth to her second child, Princess Charlotte.
Regular Emma Thompson Is About To Become Dame Emma Thompson
The venerable Emma Thompson will be joining the ranks of the Dame’ed. According to the Associated Press, Queen Elizabeth II about to get her investiture on, and give Emma the title of Dame Emma. It’s the lady equivalent of a knighthood. Emma will finally be able to join fellow Dames Judi Dench, Julie Andrews, Angela Lansbury, Helen Mirren, Joan Collins and Maggie Smith in the secret underground Dame Fight Club where the only things that land harder than the punches, are the devastating one-liners.
Keira Knightley Recently Started Wearing Wigs To Prevent Her Hair From Falling Out
Under that hat could be one of two things. It’s either a scalp full of healthy hairs that are mad at Keira Knightley for inflicting years of processing damage, or an itchy wig. One thing is for sure: you won’t pull off that hat and find a patchy follicular Hellscape of tiny regrowth hairs. Because Keira Knightley stopped letting them fuck with her hair on film sets a long time ago.
Several Directors Say That Keira Knightley Isn’t As Bad As John Carney Says She Is (UPDATE)
On Monday, we learned that the director of Begin Again, John Carney, didn’t exactly have a soft spot in his heart for Keira Knightley after he shat on her during a bunch of interviews for his latest film, Sing Street. John called her a “supermodel” who wasn’t ready to be an actress, and accused her of being a showbiz diva who showed up to set with an entourage. Clearly not every director in Hollywood feels the same way, because three have dropped their backpacks and jumped to her defense in the metaphorical schoolyard fight that is John vs. Keira.
So, It Looks Like Keira Knightley And The Director Of “Begin Again” Are Never Going To Work Together Again
John Carney, the director of Once, is out there pushing his new movie Sing Street and while he’s got our attention, he’d like to tell us how he pretty much hated working with Keira Knightley and that he learned he’ll never cast a “supermodel” like her again.
Begin Again starred Keira Knightley as a singer-songwriter type who gets discovered by a once-successful record executive played by Mark Ruffalo. Adam Levine is also in it and he basically plays Adam Levine. I watched Begin Again a couple of years ago after it came out on HBO or Starz or whatever, and I didn’t think it was the worse thing and I definitely didn’t call up my cable company and say, “You better give me a partial refund, because I just struggled through a shit show of a movie that killed pieces of my soul and it’s all Keira Knightley’s fault!” (However, I may have done that after watching A Dangerous Method.)
But John Carney, who directed Begin Again, thinks that main problem with that movie was KK. John started off his interview with The Independent by shitting on Keira right out the gate.
Keira Knightley Is A Mom
After months of building a massive collection of whimsical Flower Fairies maternity couture, it looks like Keira Knightley can go ahead and stuff them all in a bag and throw them in the donation bin, because E! says she doesn’t need them anymore. “Multiple sources” have confirmed that Keira Knightley has given birth to the baby that was growing inside her for the past 9 months, which means Keira and her husband James Righton are parents now. I know, this news is nothing unless it’s being sung by Michael Bolton.
Keira isn’t exactly the run-to-the-press fame whore type, so not much is really known about Keira Knightley’s baby just yet. But here’s what I do know: it could be a boy or a girl and it’s most likely under 20lbs. Then again, I probably shouldn’t assume anything, since there’s always a chance she gave birth to a 30lb record-shattering vagina-destroying baby. But for the sake of her down-low parts, let’s all cross our fingers and pray that didn’t happen.
I know I mentioned before that I hoped Keira and James embraced all those ght‘s in their last names and named their kid Dwight Knightley-Righton, but now I want to change my baby name guess. Keira and James both have very fancy British-sounding names, so until I hear otherwise, I choose to believe they named their new baby either Poppy Pippa Paddington, Nigel Fitzcrumpet, Keep Calm Reference, or Corgi Union Jack Marmalade. It’s totally the last one, isn’t it?