For the fifth – yes fifth – time, Julia Roberts has been chosen by People magazine (aka People with Aggressive Publicists magazine) for their annual World’s Most Beautiful issue. I honestly didn’t think People could get more predictable with their pick than when they threw Jennifer Aniston on the cover last year, but here we are.
Before Stepmom came out in December of 1998, there was a rumor that Susan Sarandon and Julia Roberts hated working with each other. Both Susan and Julia denied that they were feuding to Entertainment Weekly about a month before the film’s release. Julia called the rumor “boring” and a “yawn” and said she was actually hoping people would have started a better rumor, like that she and Susan were fucking each other. Almost twenty years later, the rumor can finally be throw out along with that a VHS copy of Stepmom that every basement seems to have.
Tomorrow we find out if all the hard work and hand jobs Ryan Reynolds has been giving have paid off when the Oscar nominations are announced. But today we find out whose lazy hand job of a performance was rewarded with a 2017 Razzie nomination
There was a nominations sweep at this year’s Razzies. Zoolander 2 got 9 nominations, followed closely behind by Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice with 8. Sorry, 1997’s Batman and Robin, it looks like you’re still the Batman movie with the most Razzie nominations. But don’t worry, there’s a chance that Batman movie written and directed by Ben Affleck could happen.
Jared Leto’s award dreams came true in the most Twilight Zone-y of ways. He’s not going to get the Oscar nomination he was no doubt sure he was going to get, but he did get a Worst Supporting Actor Razzie for Suicide Squad. And Julia Roberts’ performance as Lady Wearing a Bad Wig in Mother’s Day earned her a Worst Actress nomination. That wig didn’t get a Worst Supporting Actor nomination, because of course it didn’t; that wig worked its ass off and supported her like a load-bearing beam.
And Ben Affleck received his 10th Razzie nomination today. The big one-zero! He should go out and celebrate tonight for reaching a career milestone. Maybe his BFF Tom Brady will treat Ben to a steamed green bean and unseasoned fish dinner at his house.
The list of nominees is after the cut.
The shady paycheck-analyzing bitches at Forbes have released their annual “Actors with too many undeserved dollars in their wallet” list (aka Hollywood’s Most Overpaid Actors of 2016). For the second year in a row, Johnny Depp has topped the list.
Forbes figured out the most overpaid actors like this:
Our rundown of Hollywood’s Most Overpaid Actors looked at the last three films each actor starred in before June 2016, save animated films, movies where the actor appeared in an insignificant role, or movies that were released on fewer than 2,000 screens.We then deducted the estimated production budget from the global box office for each film according to Box Office Mojo to come up with a limited definition of each movie’s operating income. We took the total operating income from the star’s three most recent significant films then divided by the star’s estimated pay for those films to come up with a final return on investment number.
Math isn’t my strongest brain function, so I’m taking Forbes’ word for it.
Brad Pitt has been laying low ever since St. Angie Jolie caused the definition of marriage to crumble into a billion pieces when she filed for divorce. I figured that he’d spend the next few weeks holed up in his bachelor mansion where he’d suck on cigars and play cards with Jacques Jolie-Pitt on a table made from the empty pizza boxes they’ve been collecting ever since they moved in. But on Monday, Brad hosted a private screening in L.A. of Moonlight, which may get a few Oscar nominations and was produced by his production company Plan B. Julia Roberts also showed up to support Brad and she may or may not have brought a shirt with the words “A Low Angie” on it and asked him if he wanted to wear it for the pics.
I figured that in the first pictures of Brad since the SPLIT OF THE CENTURY, he’d look bloated, puffy-eyed, extra greasy and he’d have dried nacho cheese clinging to the side of his mouth and flies circling the crusty shirt he hasn’t changed in weeks. (What I’m saying is that I thought he’d look like me on any given day of the week.) But Brad actually washed his ass, put on clean clothes and showed up looking like a Pacific Northwestern high school English teacher who tells the kids to call him by his first name and can be found down-low vaping behind the bleachers at lunch time.
It was reported that Brad wasn’t going to go to the premiere of his movie Allied in L.A. tonight, but People says that he will be there. It’s going to be real awkward for Brad to pose next to his unborn baby growing inside of Marion Cotillard’s body. I need an escandalo right now, okay?
While the cast of Cafe Society is nervously crossing their fingers and hoping that nobody else asks about or makes any jokes about Woody Allen’s alleged gross ways, the cast of Money Monster is apparently having a great time at Cannes. Or maybe they’re just happy that the worst thing they have to deal with are sort-of “Meh” reviews. Yesterday, Julia Roberts and George Clooney were caught giggling their asses off at the Money Monster photocall, and today they were doing the same thing at the premiere.
Whatever airline Julia flew to France on clearly lost her bag containing all her fucks, because didn’t have a single one. She was cackling and clinging onto Clooney for stability like she had just hit up the deux-pour-un champagne happy hour at the hotel. About halfway up the red carpet, she kicked off her heels and walked the rest of it barefoot. I guess what I’m trying to say is, Julia knows how to do Cannes right. Even though Julia and George make the cutest couple on the red carpet, she wasn’t actually his date. That honor goes to Amal Clooney, of course, who wore what looks like a dead-ringer for the most expensive gown in the bridesmaid section of David’s Bridal.
I don’t know what George and Amal are looking at, but based on Amal’s ‘restrained horror’ face, I’m going to assume it’s the moment Julia whipped off her shoes. “How frightfully horrible. George, tell that woman to put her footwear back on before I report her to the proper authorities and she’s escorted off the property.”
Here’s more from the Money Monster premiere. I’ve also included some pictures of Susan Sarandon, who isn’t in the movie, but looks really good. According to me, at least. Piers Morgan, on the other hand, is probably on the ground unconscious after clutching his pearls so hard he cut off the circulation to his head.