Open Post: Hosted By Joni Mitchell Stealing The Show During A Surprise Closing Set At The Newport Folk Festival

Way back in 1967, Judy Collins introduced an up-and-coming Joni Mitchell to the crowds at the Newport Folk Festival. It was the 23-year-old’s major debut, and she performed her song “Both Sides Now.” She returned for 1968 and 1969, but, after that, the festival was canceled until 1985 (blame disco!). Joni suffered a brain aneurysm in 2015, which temporarily took her speech and ability to walk. Other than the odd interview, picking up her Kennedy Center Honors, and saying, “Fuck you, Joe Rogan”, we haven’t heard much from her. That all changed this past Sunday when 78-year-old Joni made her triumphant return to the Newport Folk Festival for her first full-length public concert anywhere since 2000. And yeah, she performed “Both Sides Now”. Tear ducts, activate! Continue reading

The Rock Praised Joe Rogan’s Response To His Spotify Controversy

While Prince Harry and Meghan Markle may have voiced some “concerns” about getting into bed with Spotify if Joe Rogan is also gonna be there getting the sheets all greasy, The Rock is more than eager to hop on in and get a look at those legendary nips up close. And he’s even agreed to bring some of his signature tequila now that Joe’s addressed the controversy. Possible future president The Rock was apparently one of several people who were actually able to stomach the stream of verbal diarrhea spewing out of Joe’s mouth in his almost 10-minute long response to Neil Young and Joni Mitchell telling Spotify to kick rocks for helping perpetuate misinformation about COVID-19 on their  #1 rated podcast The Joe Rogan Experience. According to TMZ, The Rock has sampled Joe’s hot and chunky stream and declared it to be “Great stuff.”

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Joni Mitchell Joins Neil Young In Pulling Her Music Off Of Spotify Over “Irresponsible People Spreading Lies”

You know you really fucked up when you start pissing off the Canadians. Earlier this month a group of 270 doctors and scientists released an open letter to Spotify asking them to do something about “menace to public health” Joe Rogan because he keeps mouth-farting out all sorts of COVID-19-related misinformation to his millions of listeners. Then this week, Neil Young threw down an ultimatum to Spotify, telling them that either Joe Rogan goes, or he goes. Spotify sided with Joe Rogan and pulled most of Neil Young’s music, which was the opposite of $urprising since Spotify has a $100 million multi-year deal with Joe Rogan. And now the legendary Joni Mitchell, whose vast catalog is a treasure trove for ears, has announced that she’s looked at it from both sides now and she’s on Neil’s side.

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Joni Mitchell Had An Aneurysm And Can’t Speak, So Says David Crosby

Joni Mitchell was found unconscious at her home in L.A. late last March and we haven’t really had that many updates about how she’s doing. Back in April, there was a story going around that she was in a coma and was seconds away from skipping up to the great big Woodstock stage in the sky, but her website quickly dropped a dry queef of denial on that. They said that Joni was “awake” and “alert” and was expected to make a full recovery. There hasn’t been an update since then, but during an interview with HuffPost Live about his solo tour, her friend, former old man of a minute and legendary stache wearer David Crosby said that she’s at home and recovering. David also said that the aneurysm fucked with her something real and she still can’t talk.

“I have not spoken to her. To my knowledge, she is not speaking yet. She is home, she is in care, she is in recovery. How that’s going to go, we don’t know yet. She took a terrible hit. She had an aneurysm, and nobody found her for a while. And she’s going to have to struggle back from it the way you struggle back from a traumatic brain injury.

I love her. She was my old lady at one point. She’s probably the best of us — probably the greatest living singer-songwriter. … We’re all holding our breath and thinking a good thought, hoping that it’s going to turn out okay.”

“Greatest living songwriter..” Um, obviously David Crosby doesn’t know that poetic lyricist Tyga is alive. Hopefully Joni Mitchell makes a full recovery because my ears need to hear her say, “Step off, bitch,” to Taylor Swift one more time.

Joni Mitchell Is Reportedly In A Coma (UPDATE: No, She’s Not)

UPDATE: According to a note on her website, Joni is still in the hospital, but she’s not in a coma and is not close to twirling up to heaven.

Contrary to rumors circulating on the Internet today, Joni is not in a coma. Joni is still in the hospital – but she comprehends, she’s alert, and she has her full senses. A full recovery is expected. The document obtained by a certain media outlet simply gives her longtime friend Leslie Morris the authority – in the absence of 24-hour doctor care – to make care decisions for Joni once she leaves the hospital. As we all know, Joni is a strong-willed woman and is nowhere near giving up the fight. Please continue to keep Joni in your thoughts.

Here’s the original post:

Well, damn. Prayer circles were formed late last month when 71-year-old Joni Mitchell was found unconscious at her home in Bel Air, CA and was taken to UCLA Medical Center. The other day, I wondered how she’s doing and today I got my answer. The answer is: She’s in a bad, bad way.

The day after Joni went to the hospital, her rep said that she was in “good spirits” and was awake. A few days later, her Twitter account said she was resting comfortably and getting better each day. I’m not sure what happened between now and then, but TMZ says that she’s now in a coma and is responding to nothing. TMZ found out, because Joni’s friend of a million years, Leslie Morris, filed documents to become her conservator. Apparently, Joni has no close relatives who could take the role. The documents also say that Joni is “so impaired as to be incapable of being assessed.”

Joni’s rep hasn’t said anything about this yet. Joni’s official diagnosis isn’t known, but she has talked about having a condition called Morgellons (again, DO NOT GOOGLE THAT) and once said that years of smoking fucked with her singing voice.

QUICK! Somebody whisper the words, “Joni, they just greenlighted a biopic about your life starring Taylor Swift.” Maybe she’ll wake up to slap a trick hard.

And back to the prayer circle…

Joni Mitchell Is In The Hospital After She Was Found Unconscious In Her Home

And all together now while putting on “River“: NOOOooooOOOOOO.

TMZ says that the legendary Joni Mitchell was found unconscious at her home in Bel Air this afternoon. Someone at her house called 911. Joni eventually came to and was “alert” during the ambulance ride to the hospital. 71-year-old Joni is now in ICU. Her Twitter account confirmed that she’s in the hospital, but they didn’t really have any details. TMZ says that they’re hearing it’s “serious.”

The Daily Mail also points out that in her memoirs, Joni wrote about how she was diagnosed with Morgellons, which is a condition where the sufferer believes that disgusting parasites are living under their skin. If you want to be able to close your eyes again, do not go to Google Images and type in “Morgellons.”

Now let’s resume the prayer circle.

Pic: Getty