There’s very few things that could make me appreciate the wig-patting simper of Jimmy Fallon. This isn’t one of those things. Fortunately, Seth Meyers passes muster, and he offset his former co-worker’s presence last night on Saturday Night Live Weekend Update Thursday.
Jamie Foxx filmed a Tonight Show promo and decided to pretend to use sign language, while that simpering enabler of assholes Jimmy Fallon laughed at Jamie’s outrageous antics. (Who knows why Wanda thought that was hilarious, but at least he didn’t sing.) The deaf community, as represented by model/activist/dancing Tarzan cosplayer Nyle DiMarco, was unamused.
Katy Perry is finally experiencing a senior slump (she managed to make it past sophomore and junior), and her latest singles aren’t capturing the world’s imagination like she’s come to expect. Hillary Clinton couldn’t guarantee sales and neither could that bizarro video which only a cannibal cop could love.
So, she’s using the past to push the third song from her upcoming record, Witness, HARD. And by HARD, I mean she’s doing everything but calling the song “Taylor Swift Is An Evil, Fake-Ass Bitch Bully And We’re Still Fighting.” E! tells us that Katy went on The Tonight Show to promote her song Swish Swish, and Jimmy Fallon made sure to go with the one giant talking point her publicist gave him:
TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT Continue reading
Sportsball isn’t my thing, so my lack of enthusiasm for the Super Bowl is palpable. Plus, it turns out that the team I’m supposed to be rooting for has some dubious allegiances. “Well, who cares? You’re not into the Super Bowl. Go read a book, whiny!” You don’t get it! Did you see where I just linked to? J Harvey lives in Boston! You can’t NOT LIKE THE PATRIOTS or NOT CARE ABOUT SPORTSBALL here. They find you!
For real, I have to have set replies ready in the back of my head for when someone tries to engage me in Pats conversation. I get some sort of Pats-related sports factoid having to do with the current season from one of my brothers. I also make sure my “ready reply” avoids expressing an actual opinion. And voila! How do you think I get through most Uber rides and barbershop haircuts here in the Hub?
Jimmy Fallon had a bunch of adorable little pups predict who’s going to win the big game between the New England Patriots and the Atlanta Falcons on The Tonight Show last night. This uncomfortable and possibly life-threatening situation would be able to be avoided if THIS was how they played professional football in the US. With puppies! I’d watch every game!
In addition to being credited with making football palatable to me for a few moments, these puppies should also be credited for briefly allowing me to stomach Jimmy Fallon.
Check out the puppy predictors below!
Almost two years ago, Nicole Kidman appeared on The Tonight Show and told a story about the time she tried – and failed – to get a date with Jimmy Fallon. Nicole showed up to Jimmy’s apartment and hit on him. Jimmy was a clueless dum-dum and didn’t pick up what Nicole threw down. Nicole returned to The Tonight Show last night to promote her latest movie Lion, and they both played up how awkward it is between the two of them now. The audience didn’t know that they were in for a lot more than just the mental image of Jimmy giggling while doing Nicole’s icicle body.
Jimmy Fallon earned an eternal side-eye from myself and the many, many others when he played cutesy with the Dorito-toned crazy currently running for POTUS during an interview on The Tonight Show. As he massaged Donald Trump’s hair like a desperate rub n’ tug parlor worker with the rent due, you could almost read the “I’m covering my ass just in case he wins” in his face. But not everyone on The Tonight Show followed Jimmy’s lead and kissed Trumps ass. The Tonight Show’s house band The Roots took a cue from Trump’s wall idea if and performed a short selection from an Erykah Badu song with an appropriate lyric when he walked out. via Entertainment Weekly
The Roots welcomed Trump to the stage with a short rendition of Erykah Badu’s “20 Feet Tall.” As the former reality television host took the stage, singer Black Thought sang, “Then you, you built a wall/ A 20-foot wall so I couldn’t see.” A major part of Trump’s platform is a proposed plan to build a wall along the U.S-Mexico border if elected president.
You can see The Roots’ troll move at the 11:30 mark below below:
This isn’t the first time that The Roots has used a song to express their true feelings about a guest. When Michelle Bachmann appeared on the show in 2011, they played a bit of Fishbone’s “Lyin’ Ass Bitch.”
Maybe The Roots can take Jimmy aside and teach him how to perfectly shade and troll a guest to their face?