I don’t think that there’s a single person who could read that headline and be surprised. Maybe if they thought that Jersey Shore was a romantic-comedy about a New Jersey couple who spend a summer by the beach in the hopes of reigniting their romance. Then someone would be like: “Oh that actor’s girlfriend attacked him?!” But that person would be wrong.
Jersey Shore is a comedy, but not the good kind–you laugh to stop from crying at the dark, trashy state humanity finds itself in. While DJ Pauly D and Vinnie Guadagnino may have moved on (ish–dating women on a competition show is different than picking up girls at the bar… sort of) from their past and are starting a new reality-type existence of their own, their meathead co-star, Ronnie Ortiz-Magro, seems caught in the same place. His tumultuous relationship with Sammi “Sweetheart” Giancola was a major narrative on Jersey Shore. Ronnie may not be with Sammi anymore, but his current girlfriend–and mother of his child–seems to be equally as invested as Sammi was in fighting with Ronnie. On New Years, his messy girlfriend, Jen Harley, who has a history of going crazy, attacked Ronnie with an ashtray and now she’s been arrested for it.
You know how the Jersey Shore douches are all about that GTL (gym, tan, laundry) life? Well, that was years ago and now sources are saying that Pauly D is currently more about that PTL (plastic surgery, tan, laundry) life, because they say his hard cum gutters are from something called ab etching.
Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino forgot rule #1 of any money situation, which is that if you find yourself making more of it, you need to remember to pay Uncle Sam. Otherwise, you might find yourself in a locked-up situation. Which is where The Situation is today.
Jersey Shore is coming back to MTV and nothing has changed yet everything has changed (mainly their faces and bodies, the gang’s had a lot of work done). Entertainment Tonight reports that almost the entire cast (Sammi Sweetheart is the only one missing this check) will be traveling to Miami for Jersey Shore Family Vacation: Smells Like Old Times, which will air on April 5th. Continue reading
If there’s one thing we all know, it’s that the IRS is the brightest pupil from Detective LaToya’s House of Creeping. In short, pay up or she’ll find your ass. Even though Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino had claimed he had not been guilty of adding tax evasion to his G, T, L to-do list, it appears a deal has been struck since he plead guilty in court today. Continue reading
Some people weren’t happy when MTV brought back Jersey Shore in the form of Floribama Shore. Sigh, I guess some people just don’t appreciate their share of beachside moonshine. But MTV clearly took note and has decided to bring back the original group of spray tanned, Jäger-loving hot messes. Continue reading