Category: James Earl Jones

The Lion Speaks Tonight In The New Full Length Trailer For “The Lion King”

April 10, 2019 / Posted by:

For the first time in furstory, RuPaul needs to tell both Mufasa (James Earl Jones) and Scar (Chiwetel Ejiofor) to sashay away. The time came for them to lipsync for their lives, and they both fucked it up. In the first full-length trailer for Disney’s “live-action” remake of The Lion King, it’s impossible to tell what is a voiceover and what is supposed to be coming out of them critters’ mouths. Sorry, Disney. This is not an improvement. I honestly think they’ve made a grave mistake. None of this looks right to me. In the original, Simba smiled to express joy. You cannot have a realistic lion smile, it would be positively ghoulish. So they’ve all got weird, stiff mouths and they should have kept their veils on.

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Here’s The Teaser Trailer For The Live-Action Version Of “The Lion King”

November 23, 2018 / Posted by:

The teaser trailer for Disney’s latest minimal effort cash grab, the live-action remake of The Lion King, rolled out yesterday while many of us were busy eating animals. Which is alarming if you think about it. Here’s Disney, trying to get us invested in the inner lives of talking birds and shit, as we’re feasting on the carcasses of their brethren. The sick fucks.

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Here Is Who Is Voicing Who In Disney’s Live-Action Version Of “The Lion King”

November 2, 2017 / Posted by:

Disney’s latest live-action MWTPTBG (mess with the potential to be good), The Lion King, is coming together and yesterday, Disney tweeted a picture of the confirmed cast. For a company like Disney, that is a very low-budget community theater-looking cast sheet. Not to mention how confusing it must have been when the real star  Beyonce saw it. “Can someone explain why both my picture and name are the same size as everyone else? Oh wait, is this like a Destiny’s Child thing, where I pretend I’m part of a group? Ok, gotcha (wink).

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Beyonce May Be Joining The New Live-Action “The Lion King” Remake

April 1, 2017 / Posted by:

I realize that during the Grammys earlier this year is that Beyonce, the queen of our time, placed a spell on all of us in the middle of her Offering to the Goddess performance when she gazed into the camera like “Love Me..Join Tidal… I COMMAND YOU!!” But that shit don’t work on me, because I don’t drink the damn lemonade. I prefer my ice to caress whiskey and honestly, I don’t even need the ice. So go hypnotize someone else, sistah!

Still, the spell worked on a few people (like Adele, who damn near somersaulted on stage to present Queen Bey with her Grammy on a bended knee). And director Jon Favreau is also ready to hand over stacks of cash for her to voice Nala in an upcoming live-action remake of The Lion King.

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Donald Glover And James Earl Jones Have Been Cast In The Live-Action “The Lion King”

February 18, 2017 / Posted by:

Mufasa lives! Or, rather, Mufasa will live AGAIN, until that catty queen Scar engineers his tragic death in a live-action film, The Lion King.

Director Jon Favreau, fresh off his live-action The Jungle Book, is giving Simba, Pumbaa, Rafiki, and those angel-dusted hyenas the similar treatment (there are no original ideas in Hollywood). Jon revealed the voice-casting of Donald Glover as Simba, and Mufasa himself, James Earl Jones, via Twitter this week.

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