Since Salma Hayek is married to a billionaire, that better not be one of Katy Perry’s old ones. That wig better be made from a mane that was donated by an actual pastel pink unicorn. Or a wig made from the pubes of the actual Jem.
At the Women in Motion party at Cannes last night, Salma worked a cotton candy lace front while posing with her billionaire husband and Isabelle Huppert on the black carpet. That wig isn’t the look, but Salma obviously disagrees with me, because She. Is. Feeling. Her. Self. Throw a pink wig on Salma Hayek and suddenly she’s come hither-ing for her life.
And yesterday when my hungover eyes saw these pictures in thumbnail form on the photo agency’s website, I thought it was Kylie Jenner wearing more bronzer than usual. I hope I’m the only one who thought that and nobody told Salma they reminded her of Kylie Jenner. Because if they did, she’d torch that wig and get a new face installed on her head so nobody would ever say the words, “You kind of remind me of Kylie Jenner tonight,” to her again. And honestly, that’d be a reasonable reaction.
We’ve been shitting up post after post from last night’s Adele Appreciation Ceremony (Featuring Adele Appreciating Beyonce), but another awards show happened yesterday. Two weeks before Hollywood gets dressed up in $15,000 gowns to lick each other’s taints and jack one another off at the Oscars, they got into $15,000 gowns to lick each other’s taints and jack one another off at the BAFTAs last night.