Well I’ll be a corn shucker’s silver dollar pancake! Last week boot scootin’ salad tosser Miranda Lambert went and surprised us all (not really) by throwing some lettuce on a stranger in a steak restaurant. Not that Miranda needs an excuse to toss a salad in public whenever she feels like it, but now we know the real reason why she did it! Miranda was just releasing some pre-wedding jitters. That’s right, Miranda has gone and surprised us all again (not really) by getting secret married to her new boyfriend of a few minutes.
When it was reported earlier this week that Ben Affleck and Lindsay Shookus had broken up after about a year of dating, and that he had moved on to a 22-year-old Playboy model, it seemed like yet another box was checked on Ben’s Mid-Life To-Do List. I’m sure anyone was surprised, and Jennifer Garner was right there with the rest of us.
After years and years of allegations and hints and Law & Order episodes implying that Terry Richardson is a class-A creep, the New York Daily News says that the NYPD’s Special Victim’s Squad is currently conducting an investigation against him. “Okay, but what took so long,” thought anyone familiar with Uncle Terry.
Anyone who has ever watched the Dr. Phil show knows that the “Dr.” in the name Dr. Phil McGraw feels less like a medical title and more like an abbreviation for Driventoexploitpeople. Well, the Dr. Phil show might be doing more than just profiting off people’s problems. According to an investigation published by The Boston Globe’s STAT News, the Dr. Phil show is also allegedly guilty of encouraging guests to get fucked-up before they walk on stage.
Gwyneth Paltrow woke up this morning with an email from nonprofit consumer watchdog group Truth in Advertising (aka TINA). Rather than words, it was just a clip of Dionne Warwick saying, “I got your number, hussy.” OK, maybe she didn’t get that, but she done pissed off TINA!
I wish I could say this was a story about how Gwyneth Paltrow called up NASA and asked if they could get to work on creating a zero-gravity vaginal steaming booth for her. Rather, this is about NASA calling out the dubious claims of something dumb and expensive that was shilled on Goop.com.