Category: I’ll See You In Court!

Cardi B Thinks She’s Too Famous For Court

December 4, 2018 / Posted by:

Remember when Cardi B turned herself in for allegedly arranging for those two girls to get jumped? That was the last time she was going to take this shit seriously, because when she was supposed to go to court yesterday, she did not show up. And why was Cardi not in attendance? Durh, because she’s way too relevant and busy to be bothered. Delusion, thy name is Cardi B

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CNN And Jim Acosta Have Filed A Lawsuit Against Donald Trump And Sarah Sanders

November 13, 2018 / Posted by:

This season of America is so wild, y’all. Did you catch last week’s episode where President Trump was holding a press conference and Jim Acosta from CNN asked him a few pointed questions, so Trump sent in an intern to take his microphone away and then revoked his press credentials? Then had his press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders try to make it seem like it was because Jim had “placed hands” on the intern by posting a video they got from a fringe, right-wing conspiracy website, which one of Trump’s attorneys later confirmed to had been “not altered” but “sped up“? That shit was BANANAS. Well, this week’s episode is just as crazy. CNN and Jim are suing Donald, Sarah, White House Chief of Staff John Kelly, the Deputy Chief of staff, the Director of the Secret Service, and an individual secret service officer.

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A Dutch Man Is Suing To Have His Age Legally Changed From 69 To 49

November 9, 2018 / Posted by:

Men have a very narrow window in which they can get a fair shake in life. They’re at the peak of their powers between the ages 40 and 60. Any man below the age of 40 isn’t taken seriously, and sadly, any man over the age of 60 is practically invisible. It’s not fair, and it’s not right, but it just is. And has been for centuries. Well, one man is saying no more!

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A Swiss Tourist Is Suing The Elvis Presley Estate For Giving Him Tinnitus

October 30, 2018 / Posted by:

A Swiss man and his daughter decided to have a nice quiet vacation in America and the dad came home with a life-ruining case of tinnitus that he claims eventually broke up his marriage. According to The Blast, Hans-Peter Gauch says that while he and his daughter were staying at The Guesthouse at Graceland hotel in Memphis last October, they were awakened by a very loud fire alarm. Now he’s suing the Elvis Presley Estate for negligence and is seeking $75,000 in damages. And I hope he gets it too. I’d like to sue the EPE for exposing my ear to his terrible covers songs for decades.

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A Woman Is Suing Billy Idol For Standing Her Up For A Hotel “Meet And Greet”

October 22, 2018 / Posted by:

Apparently, even though the year is 2018 and Billy Idol is 62 years of age, lusty ladies are still more than willing to drop their panties for him. Not only will they drop their panties, they will drop every fucking thing in their damn life for a chance at one night in heaven with the sneering rocker. Well, at least one lady was, and now she’s suing Billy for standing her up.

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Frances Bean’s Ex Is Suing Courtney Love For Conspiring To Have A Laundry-List Of Crimes Done To Him

May 30, 2018 / Posted by:

Frances Bean’s ex-husband, Isaiah Silva, is not quite ready to slink back into obscurity despite winning Kurt Cobain’s “Unplugged” guitar in his divorce settlement (and precious little else). According to TMZ, Isaiah has filed a lawsuit against his ex-mother-in-law Courtney Love that accuses her of orchestrating an outlandish conspiracy against him that included burglary, robbery, assault, sexually battery, kidnapping and attempted murder. Which is probably just an average Tuesday night for Courtney, but Isaiah apparently wasn’t into it. And it was all over that GODDAMN GUITAR! Kurt must have put a heckuva hex on that axe.

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