My favorite part in a Real Housewives of Anywhere reunion is when one of them brags about her wealth and another one of them whips out her Swarovski crystal-coated iPhone with county courthouse records of tax liens and unpaid bills, catching the heifer in said lie(s). American Express is that cunning bitch for most of Hollywood.
TMZ reports that – shocker – Iggy Azalea has racked up a hefty AmEx bill. As in, $300,000 hefty. Meanwhile, I’m over her praying to the good LAWD that there’s enough room on my Vanilla Visa to pay for a macchiato when I go to Starbucks after posting this post.
Iggy’s account is reportedly $250,000 over its limit, and I couldn’t possibly imagine why. Oh, maybe it’s because she spends money on stupid ass shit like that $12,000 popsicle art she bought earlier this year. AmEx wants the full balance plus its legal fees.
This isn’t even the first time Iggy has been caught living beyond her means. The IRS has come for her twice: first for nearly $400K and then again last year for nearly $270K. Don’t fret, Iggy. There are so many words you can rhyme with “tax lien” and “maxed out,” which will go great on that song you’re working on with fellow credit abuser and ex-nemesis Azealia Banks!
Iggy Azalea and Azealia Banks used to hate each other more than spellcheck hates their names. But then Iggy decided she didn’t want to hate Azealia anymore, and Azealia agreed to stop hating on Iggy. Apparently things are so good between them, they’re working on a song together.
Last week, a future “Where are they now?” started a feud when Halsey fired some shady shots at Iggy Azalea. Halsey, who is bi-racial, said she’d never work with Iggy Azalea, because Iggy’s a “moron” with a “complete disregard for black culture.” People says Iggy talked about Halsey’s shots at her while on the Australia radio show Smallzy’s Surgery (which also sounds like where she gets her work done).
Azealia Banks has apparently put away the shank she waved in Iggy Azalea’s direction for years, and those two wrecks may have finally trashed their overcooked beef and made up. But as Azealia (temporarily) scratches Iggy’s name off of a list of enemies to cast a black magic spell on, Halsey has stood up and declared to the world that along with good taste and nice wigs, she wants nothing to do with Iggy Azalea.
A few months after Iggy Azalea called it quits with French Montana, she bounced her exploded-can-of-biscuits ass over to Odell Beckham Jr., wide receiver for the NY Giants. Page Six says that Odell skipped the Giant’s first OTA practice (organized team activities, aka training) on Monday. Instead of throwing balls with the rest of his team in New Jersey, he went bowling with Iggy and some friends in Los Angeles.
Real love IS a trick risking his life by putting his head on Iggy Azalea’s DuPont factory of an ass. Because if she blew out a fart onto his face, he would’ve died of toxic plastic fume inhalation a few seconds later.
French Montana, rapper-type and survivor of the Kartrashian Man Kurse, and Iggy Azalea, alleged rapper turned (insert the name of whatever the hell she does now), got together last August. During Friggy’s reign as the definition of true love’s favorite couple, he went to Jared seven times for her and they partook in some couples animal cruelty by posing with a poor circus elephant at his birthday party. Since both French and Iggy are certified attention whores, I figured that they would eventually get married in a televised wedding on the season finale of their E! reality show. But sadly, it looks like their love has died like that poor elephant’s sense of dignity when it was forced to perform for those two dildo dingles.