Finally, the foot fetish community has a sexy role model that they can all get behind (I wish). Because Quentin Tarantino isn’t exactly the most wholesome example of a foot freak.
Idris Elba and Kate Winslet appeared on The Graham Norton Show, and Kate revealed that Idris is into feet. He’s so into feet that he made Kate cover her peds up while they were filming a sex scene for their new movie, The Mountain Between Us. I guess so he wouldn’t bust for real if he caught a glimpse of her giant hooves?
Idris Elba recently told People that he auditioned for the role of Gaston in the live-action Beauty and The Beast, a role that ultimately went to West End musical theater veteran Luke Evans. Idris in a musical? Sounds great doesn’t it? But maybe we need to pump the brakes on that until we find out what he’s capable of.
In a promotional video for his new movie The Mountain Between Us, Idris Elba sits down and reads some fanfic and I want to know which one of you hookers goes by the pseudonym Jelly Bean Julia? Diamond Shy, where you at? What I’m saying is this could be any of us. Who among us has not harbored elaborate and unlikely scenarios where Idris springs like a snake in gag can of nuts from the confines of his trousers into our eagerly waiting hands/orifices?
Families fight. It’s a fact of life. But there’s one thing almost every member of the family can agree on: Idris Elba can get it. Sisters drop they panties for him. Aunties be making a fool out of themselves and getting them hot flashes over him. Moms be planning elaborate meals to feed him, should he ever drop by. Straight uncles be binge-watching Luther and questioning theyselves. Gay brothers already done told you ’bout him 10 years ago. Well, here’s some good news for the family to enjoy together: Idris is never going to disappoint you by marrying some unworthy chickenhead.
I don’t know why Mondays keep happening, but for some reason, they do and another one happened today. But well, the universe must have taken pity on those who have to struggle through another gross Monday, because it has gifted the world with these pictures of Big Gulp of hotness, Idris Elba, swallowing a hot dog. Mondays are still disgusting, but they aren’t that disgusting when you can rest your eyes on pictures of Idris Elba wrapping his mouth around a plump wiener between two buns.
On Saturday, Idris shot scenes in Downtown L.A. for The Dark Tower, and he took a break to fill himself with the luckiest hot dog in the world! It’s obvious to me now that Idris and I are soulmates, because like me, he’s a weird trick who can eat a dry dog. Movie theater employees always look at me like I’ve got a dick on my forehead when they ask me if I want ketchup or mustard for my hot dog and I say, “No, I like it plain.” But what’s really weird to me is that Idris’ hot dog stayed dry. I would think that as soon as he put it in his mouth, it’d shoot out a stream of mayonnaise. Weird hot dog is weird.
Here’s more of the Panty Creamer Hall of Famer on Saturday:
Panty Creamer Hall of Famer Idris Elba is currently shooting a “docu-series” for Discovery UK that follows him as he lives out his dream of being a professional kickboxer. Idris pounded and fisted a dude in a match over the weekend and sitting in the front row was Madonna, who posted a clip of him in action on Instagram. Idris and some of his friends celebrated his kickboxing debut at a restaurant in London called M, and Madge was papped going in. A witness tells The Sun that once inside, Idris risked getting his soul sucked out of his body by putting his mouth on the mouth of the always-thirsty High Priestess of the Illuminati.